Yo, wanna join dis epic Minecraft server? We got internet speeds so fast, you’ll gain weight just by logging on! According to a totally real study in Australia, our server is so lit that you’ll be packing on the pounds in no time. Plus, our players are all jacked and ready to take on any challenge. So come on down and get ready to level up your BMI while having a blast in our virtual world!

Updated October 19, 2024

Players: 97/900 Uptime: 100%
Rating: 4.1 / 5
Glowing Eyes in the Dark: 4 Cursed Amulets Found: 2
Vanishing Structures Built: 5 Gryphons Tamed: 2
Mythical Beasts Vanquished: 1 Warrior Spirits Summoned: 33
Pirate Ships Captured: 3 Chaos Emeralds Discovered: 2
Sentient Weapons Trained: 1 Friendship Bracelets Exchanged: 30

Random Fact: Cute But True: Someone built a house out of enchanted gingerbread—it’s sturdy, sweet, and smells like Christmas all year round.

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