No wipes, 1 life (hardcore), only 9 inventory slots, vanilla world! Cheats are prohibited!
| Players: | 90/100 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.7 / 5 | ||
| Love Letters Sent: | 1 | Wizards Turned into Frogs: | 0 |
| Meteor Showers Witnessed: | 1 | Astral Amulets Crafted: | 26 |
Random Fact: Did You Hear? A player accidentally enchanted their bed to sing lullabies—now they fall asleep faster than ever.
But the real question is, how can you resist joining a server where you can support a girl who not only does drugs, but also manages to somehow thrive in the midst of all the chaos? Who knows what kind of wild adventures await you as you explore this unpredictable world.
So grab your pickaxe, saddle up your trusty steed, and get ready to experience a Minecraft SMP like no other. Just remember, anything goes in this world, so buckle up and prepare for the ride of your life.
| Players: | 91/600 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.0 / 5 | ||
| Curse of Binding Applied: | 2 | Cursed Artifacts Recovered: | 7 |
| Herobrine Sightings: | 4 | Nether Portals Gone Wrong: | 4 |
Random Fact: Trivia: The last enchanted forest planted was accidentally grown upside down, yet it thrived—go figure!
Join us for epic adventures and crazy shenanigans that will leave you laughing for days. Who knows, maybe you’ll even find a hidden treasure chest filled with chocolate milk and straws!
Don’t be like the guy who drank his girlfriend’s milk without telling her – join our server and never miss a beat. Plus, if you ever need to confess your Minecraft sins, our community is always here to listen and laugh it off.
So what are you waiting for? Come join us and let’s create some hilarious memories together! Just remember, always replace the milk with a straw next time. 😉
| Players: | 101/200 | Uptime: | 99% |
| Rating: | 4.5 / 5 | ||
| Magic Wands Crafted: | 11 | Vampire Cloaks Sewn: | 2 |
| Unicorn Parades Witnessed: | 2 | Enchanted Armories Found: | 7 |
Random Fact: Fun Fact: Teleportation mishaps are the leading cause of unexpected interdimensional friendships.
| Players: | 94/600 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.2 / 5 | ||
| Demonic Pacts Formed: | 0 | Legendary Armor Sets Assembled: | 56 |
| Lunar Scepters Activated: | 12 | Immortal Potions Brewed: | 15 |
Random Fact: Did you hear? The most powerful magic item found this week was a spoon that can bend reality.
join us and you’ll be transported to a world where russian officials are actually creepers in disguise, trying to blow up your epic builds. but don’t fret, you can team up with other players to defeat them and protect your precious loot.
plus, did we mention that our server is run by a group of deranged llamas who have a penchant for throwing parties with unlimited cake and fireworks? it’s a wild ride, my friend.
so come on over and join the madness. who needs a stable currency when you have a server this insane?
| Players: | 103/600 | Uptime: | 98% |
| Rating: | 4.1 / 5 | ||
| Mythical Quests Completed: | 25 | Ghost Trains Ridden: | 1 |
| Hidden Villages Discovered: | 1 | Magic Crystals Found: | 21 |
Random Fact: Legend has it that the last time someone opened a haunted chest, they found a singing teapot inside!
also, we have a pet dragon that u can ride around the server. his name is fluffy and he breathes rainbow fire. he’s the coolest dragon in all of minecraft land.
oh, and did i mention we have a haunted mansion filled with spooky ghosts? but don’t worry, they’re friendly ghosts. they just like to play pranks on unsuspecting players. it’s like living in a real-life scooby-doo episode.
so, what are u waiting for? come join our server and experience all the craziness for yourself. plus, we have free pizza every friday night. who can say no to that?
| Players: | 108/600 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.9 / 5 | ||
| Buildings Constructed: | 45 | Leprechaun Gold Stolen: | 2 |
| Rune Stones Activated: | 6 | Ether Blades Crafted: | 17 |
Random Fact: Whimsical Fact: A player built a house entirely out of enchanted marshmallows—soft, sweet, and always smells like vanilla.
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| Players: | 90/300 | Uptime: | 97% |
| Rating: | 4.8 / 5 | ||
| Mythical Beasts Vanquished: | 4 | Tesseract Cubes Discovered: | 1 |
| Talking Trees Consulted: | 4 | Cosmic Hamsters Found: | 4 |
Random Fact: Wild But True: Someone actually summoned an Eldritch Beast using nothing but friendship bracelets!
| Players: | 96/900 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.6 / 5 | ||
| Evil Portals Destroyed: | 2 | Void Gems Collected: | 33 |
| Pirate Ships Raided: | 0 | Shadow Cloaks Sewn: | 4 |
Random Fact: Did you know? The most recent world-altering spell accidentally turned a mountain into a giant chocolate cake.
| Players: | 105/400 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.3 / 5 | ||
| Hedge Mazes Navigated: | 10 | Vanishing Structures Built: | 4 |
| Werewolf Howls Heard: | 1 | Celestial Crowns Worn: | 4 |
Random Fact: Legend has it that the last time someone opened a haunted chest, they found a singing teapot inside!
| Players: | 109/600 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.5 / 5 | ||
| Herobrine Sightings: | 8 | Epic Shields Constructed: | 22 |
| Treasure Maps Found: | 10 | God-Killer Bows Constructed: | 8 |
Random Fact: Fun Fact: Cozy campfires are rumored to attract wandering gods who just want to share a story.
| Players: | 96/600 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.2 / 5 | ||
| Divine Scrolls Written: | 22 | Mythical Quests Completed: | 22 |
| Fairy Circles Danced In: | 7 | Mystical Amulets Crafted: | 15 |
Random Fact: Magical Fact: A player once brewed a potion that turned their pet into a talking companion—it always knows just what to say.
Imagine this: you’re peacefully mining for diamonds when suddenly a herd of dancing pigs wearing top hats and monocles appear out of nowhere, offering you a quest to find the legendary bacon sword. Yes, you heard that right, a sword made entirely out of bacon! And that’s just the beginning of the madness on our server.
But wait, there’s more! Ever wanted to ride a giant chicken into battle against an army of evil llamas? Or build a house out of exploding TNT blocks just for the thrill of it? Well, on our server, anything is possible.
So why waste your time on boring servers when you can join us and have the time of your life? Trust us, you won’t regret it. Join now and let the insanity begin!
| Players: | 108/700 | Uptime: | 97% |
| Rating: | 4.2 / 5 | ||
| Eldritch Beasts Summoned: | 1 | Holy Grails Found: | 1 |
| Eldritch Medallions Worn: | 14 | Horror Stories Survived: | 3 |
Random Fact: Did you hear? The most powerful magic item found this week was a spoon that can bend reality.
| Players: | 101/600 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.2 / 5 | ||
| Magical Ponies Rescued: | 4 | Cursed Artifacts Recovered: | 16 |
| Phantom Horses Ridden: | 2 | Chaos Orbs Controlled: | 7 |
Random Fact: Adorable Lore: A player found a secret door that leads to a world of stuffed animals—it’s a cuddly paradise.
imagine you’re just mining away, minding your own business, and then BAM! you accidentally hit a lava pit and start losin’ all your hearts. well, on our server, you just activate that neural tourniquet and BAM! no more bleedin’ out!
we even did human tests and found out that this thing increases blood-clot stability! so, like, join our server now and never worry about bleedin’ out in minecraft again! plus, we got some sick builds and crazy adventures waiting for ya! come on, what are ya waitin’ for? join now!
| Players: | 101/200 | Uptime: | 98% |
| Rating: | 4.7 / 5 | ||
| Immortal Anvils Forged: | 16 | Cursed Biomes Uncovered: | 3 |
| Mythical Relics Collected: | 5 | Magical Familiars Summoned: | 4 |
Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a rainbow that they could pick up and carry—now it’s the ultimate fashion accessory.
| Players: | 98/900 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.5 / 5 | ||
| Dragon Eggs Found: | 4979 | Soul Contracts Signed: | 3 |
| Towns Built: | 10 | Friendship Bracelets Exchanged: | 17 |
Random Fact: Magical Mystery: A player tamed a dragon only to find it loves tea parties—talk about an unexpected guest!
Picture this: you’re wandering through the server, minding your own business, when suddenly you stumble upon a hidden temple filled with ancient scrolls and mystical artifacts. With the power of these Jewish esoteric secrets, you can summon lightning storms, turn your enemies into chickens, and even make diamonds rain from the sky!
But beware, not everyone on the server is friendly. There are rumors of a secret society of players who will stop at nothing to steal these powerful secrets for themselves. Will you join forces with them, or stand against them in epic battles that will go down in Minecraft history?
So why wait? Join our Minecraft SMP today and unleash the power of Jewish esoteric secrets for your own benefit! Just remember, with great power comes great responsibility…and a whole lot of laughs!
| Players: | 100/600 | Uptime: | 95% |
| Rating: | 4.4 / 5 | ||
| Unbreakable Curses Broken: | 1 | Runes Activated: | 0 |
| Astral Orbs Gathered: | 13 | Goblin Markets Raided: | 8 |
Random Fact: Did you know? The first Dragon Egg found was hatched during a meteor shower!
