Yo, forget about that boring real world news, come join our Minecraft server where we have unlimited virtual food for everyone! We got so much virtual steak and virtual cake, you won’t even remember what real food tastes like. Plus, we have a secret underground farm where we grow virtual carrots and potatoes, so you’ll never go hungry. Join now and save yourself from the UN’s food blockade in northern Gaza…or something like that. Just come play Minecraft with us, it’s way more fun than starving in real life, trust me.

Updated October 15, 2024

Players: 91/500 Uptime: 98%
Rating: 4.5 / 5
Enchanted Weapons Reforged: 9 Endless Mazes Conquered: 2
Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured: 1 Storm Giants Negotiated With: 0
Rune Stones Activated: 4 Doomsday Clocks Constructed: 0
Secret Guilds Joined: 2 Haunted Chests Opened: 10
Zombie Dances: 7 Eerie Music Discs Played: 5

Random Fact: Did you know? The last phantom ship sighted was carrying a cargo of glow-in-the-dark kittens.

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