CraftyCommieCritiques | New Minecraft Servers 2024

CreeperLoveCraft

action, Adventure, Connection, CreeperLoveCraft, EXCITEMENT, FANTASY, Intimacy, love, multiplayer, Passion, Pleasure, relationships, role playing, romance, satisfaction, sex life, simulation, Single player, strategy, video games, virtual reality

Are you tired of your sex life feeling like a solo game of Minesweeper? Join our Minecraft server and level up your love life! Our virtual world is filled with sexy villagers just waiting to trade with you…if you catch our drift. Explore our pixelated paradise and find hidden chests filled with naughty surprises. Who needs a partner when you have a diamond sword to keep you company? So ditch the real world and come play with us, because on our server, the only limit is your imagination (and maybe the Ender Dragon).

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	108/700	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Lava Oceans Crossed:	1	Legendary Titles Earned:	1
Cursed Artifacts Recovered:	24	Villages Defended:	9
Endless Night Skies:	5	Void Armor Forged:	17
Unique Catgirls Spotted:	0	Celestial Blades Sharpened:	6
Vampire Cloaks Sewn:	2	Sunfire Helmets Forged:	4

Random Fact: Wild Fact: A cursed sword, when broken, can actually release the spirits trapped inside—talk about a plot twist!

LebCraft Minecraft Server

airstrikes, Beirut, Ceasefire, Conflict, Crisis, Diplomacy, escalation, international relations, intervention, Israel, lebanon, LebCraft, MIDDLE EAST, Military Action, Minecraft, negotiations, political tension, SECURITY, Server, united states, US-backed, violence, War

Yo, so like, if you wanna join a lit Minecraft server, come to our place cuz we got crazier explosions than Israel hitting Beirut, yo! Our server is so wild, it’s like a war zone but with creepers and zombies instead of actual bombs. Plus, we straight up rejected any boring ceasefire plans cuz we’re all about that chaos and destruction, fam. Join us if you wanna experience the thrill of constant mayhem and non-stop action. Let’s blow stuff up together, yo!

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	101/800	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Epic Shields Constructed:	37	Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	4
Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	3	Reality-Warping Charms Crafted:	1
Infinity Stones Found:	3	Sentient Weapons Trained:	3
Mineshafts Explored:	1	Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured:	3
Treasure Maps Found:	7	Cursed Swords Broken:	3

Random Fact: Fun Fact: A dragon egg once hatched into a tiny kitten with wings—it now rules the skies (and laps) of the server.

UkraineCraft: Biden’s Billions

$8 billion, aid for Ukraine, Announces, biden, Bidens, Billions, long tail, military aid, tags, Ukraine, UkraineCraft

come join our epic minecraft server where we have more surprises than biden giving $8 billion in military aid to ukraine! we got creepers that explode with confetti instead of blowing up your house, we got villagers that trade diamonds for dirt because they’re just that crazy. our server is so lit, even herobrine wants to join in on the fun. come build your dream castle or create a roller coaster that goes through the nether and back. trust me, you won’t find a server like ours anywhere else. so what are you waiting for? join now and let the madness begin!

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	103/100	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	1	Astral Projections Made:	1
Dragon Eggs Hatched:	1	Shadow Daggers Crafted:	45
Heroic Legacies Created:	3	Inverted Worlds Discovered:	1
Legendary Heroes Trained:	3	Players Killed by Monsters:	1881
Forbidden Tomes Read:	4	Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	3

Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a magical teapot that pours endless hot chocolate—it’s now the most popular spot in town!

Alzheimers Drug Craze: Deaths, Data, & Conflicts!

alzheimer’s, Alzheimer’s disease, Approval, brain health, clinical trials, cognitive decline, Conflicts, controversy, CRAZE, data, deaths, DRUG, drug development, excess deaths, EXCITEMENT, financial conflicts of interest, Healthcare, independent advisory panel, Medical Ethics, neurology, new drug, patient safety, pharmaceuticals, questionable efficacy, regulatory approval, safety data

so, like, this server is like the ultimate cure for your boring Minecraft life, dude. it’s like a new drug for Alzheimer’s but for your gaming brain, ya know? there’s so much excitement, you won’t even remember what boredom feels like.

even though there’s some excess deaths (RIP to those pixels), missing safety data (who needs safety when you’re building epic structures?), and questionable efficacy (who cares as long as it’s fun), this server is the place to be, man.

and get this, the “independent” advisory panel is totally not biased at all. like, they’re so independent that they’re probably not even real people. but who cares about conflicts of interest when you’re mining diamonds and battling creepers, right?

so come join us on this wild ride of a Minecraft server. it’s like a rollercoaster for your brain, but with more explosions and less nausea. you won’t regret it, unless you do, but who cares? YOLO, amirite?

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	110/100	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Secret Guilds Joined:	1	Goblin Armies Outwitted:	8
Living Shadows Defeated:	5	Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	2
Ethereal Dreams Experienced:	7	Twisted Realms Survived:	3
Phantom Horses Ridden:	3	Gods Slained:	2
Crops Grown:	3623	Divine Scrolls Written:	13

Random Fact: Magical Fact: Someone once enchanted their fireplace to tell bedtime stories—now it’s the coziest spot in any house.

LANtErNcRaFt: Where Semi-Vanilla Meets PVE for Cross-Play Shenanigans!

activities, bedrock player, Builds, Community, crossplay, Custom Dungeons, Economy, Friendly, Griefers, Keep Inventory, Land Claim, Lanterncraft, loot tables, meets, Phone, Plugins, PvE, Questline, Resource World, Rewards, Semivanilla, Server, Shenanigans, Staff Team, Starting again, Welcoming

Welcome to Lanterncraft
We are a new Semi-Vanilla SMP server offering various activities and plugins such as a resource world, player controlled economy, quests, land claiming, custom dungeons, and crossplay for Bedrock players.

FAQ

Question	Answer
Do you have a detailed questline?	Yes, we offer multiple questlines with great rewards.
What measures do you have against griefers?	Players can claim their land to prevent griefing. Our staff team is also quick to assist in case of any damages.
Do you keep inventory on death?	Yes, we have enabled keeping inventory so players do not lose their gear upon death.
Do you have custom dungeons?	Yes, we have custom dungeons with unique loot tables for players to explore.
Is the server crossplay compatible for Bedrock players?	Yes, Bedrock players can join the server and play with Java players.
How can I join the server?	You can join via the Java IP: play.lanterncraft.net or the Bedrock IP & Port: play.lanterncraft.net:25586
Is there a Discord server for communication?	Yes, you can join our Discord server at discord.gg/TMCXNu7zgy

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	97/500	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Villages Defended:	18	New Chunks Explored:	464810
Infinite Knowledge Scrolls Discovered:	2	Paranormal Events Investigated:	3
Unsolvable Puzzles Solved:	4	Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured:	2
Eldritch Medallions Worn:	14	Chaos Gates Opened:	0
Unholy Beasts Tamed:	1	Meteorites Collected:	1

Random Fact: Magical Fact: Someone once enchanted their fireplace to tell bedtime stories—now it’s the coziest spot in any house.

Loser Incels Minecraft Server

Achievements, Careers, discrimination, equality, faults, gender equality, Gender Roles, Handouts, hard work, hobbies, Incels, Loser, Minecraft, Misogyny, Projection, Server, societal expectations, Stereotypes, Talents, weaknesses, Women

Looking for a Minecraft server where you can escape the drama of the real world? Look no further! Our server is the perfect place for all you hardworking, smart, and talented individuals to come together and build epic creations without any distractions.

Join us and leave behind the world of handouts and laziness, where equality is a foreign concept. Here, you can show off your impressive skills and achievements without being overshadowed by those who project their faults onto others.

So why wait? Join our server now and start building your own greatness, because let’s face it, women just can’t compete with the awesomeness that awaits you here!

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	94/400	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Enchanted Forests Planted:	11	Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	2
Spells Gone Horribly Wrong:	8	Secret Passages Found:	7
Unholy Beasts Tamed:	3	Invisible Walls Found:	2
Meteorites Collected:	4	Endermen Teleportation Errors:	0
Titan Hearts Harvested:	5	Potions Brewed:	160

Random Fact: Wild Fact: Every time a mimic chest is discovered, it doubles the amount of loot in the next treasure found.

The Secret Society of Minecraft SMP

ANONYMOUS, anonymous source., arstechnica, Digital, Digital Media, IMG_0466, internet, Media, media sharing, Minecraft, News, No. 78933527, ONLINE, online content, secret, smp, society, streaming, Tech News, Tech Trends, Technology, Video, video clip, video sharing

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers where the only excitement is mining for diamonds? Well, do we have the perfect SMP for you! Join us on our server where the creepers have learned how to breakdance and the villagers have formed a secret underground rave club.

But wait, there’s more! Our server is home to a legendary chicken that lays golden eggs, but only on Tuesdays. And rumor has it that if you find the hidden treasure chest in the Nether, you’ll be granted three wishes by the elusive Ender Dragon.

So why wait? Join our wacky and wild Minecraft SMP today and experience the craziest adventures you’ve ever had in the blocky world. Trust us, you won’t regret it! 🐔💃🕺🐉

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	94/300	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Titanic Battles Fought:	29	Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured:	2
Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	4	Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	0
Reality-Warping Charms Crafted:	2	Endless Mazes Solved:	4
Backwards Speech Heard:	4	Phantom Knights Defeated:	4
Lost Artifacts Recovered:	4	Magical Ponies Rescued:	7

Random Fact: Did you hear? A player once rode a unicorn straight into a dimension hop, and they haven’t stopped laughing since.

NoBoyfriendMinecraftServer

Accommodation, apartment, apartment rules, Boundaries, Boyfriend, comfort, Commitment, Communication, compromise, discomfort, Drama, Favor, friendship, guest rules, judgment, living together, NoBoyfriendMinecraftServer, Respect, roommate, temporary stay, Trust

Welcome to our Minecraft server where we have strict rules for guests just like the OP’s roommate! But don’t worry, we won’t ask you to let your roommate’s boyfriend move in for 10 days.

Join us for a wild adventure where you can build your dream world without worrying about unwanted guests overstaying their welcome. Our server is drama-free, unlike the OP’s situation with her roommate.

So come on over and let your creativity run wild, because on our server, you never have to question whether or not it’s okay to say no to someone crashing at your place for an extended period of time. Let’s build and have fun together, without the cold shoulders or awkward confrontations.

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	98/700	Uptime:	99%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Ghostly Villagers Traded With:	2	Titanic Battles Fought:	12
Ender Dragon Reincarnations:	3	Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	2
Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	6	Eerie Music Discs Played:	5
Crystal Wands Charged:	11	Vanishing Structures Built:	1
Astral Amulets Crafted:	44	Unicorn Sightings:	1

Random Fact: Lovely Lore: A friendship bracelet once turned into a glowing beacon—now it lights the way for adventurers at night.

Ozempic-FreeZone

aita, body image, body positivity, Boundaries, Communication, Conflict, diet talk, eating disorder, friendship, health, judgment, medication, misunderstanding, ozempic, OzempicFreeZone, perspective, self esteem, sensitivity, Support, weight loss

Welcome to our Minecraft server, where you can settle your real-life disputes in a virtual world! Join us for epic battles between friends, like the showdown between me (23F) and my friend Hannah (23F).

Picture this: I, a short and skinny warrior, face off against Hannah, a towering giant who has recently discovered the wonders of Ozempic. She challenges me to join her in this weight loss journey, but I, being already slender and wise, politely decline. Little did I know, my refusal would lead to a virtual feud of epic proportions!

Will you join our server and choose a side? Will you fight for the right to refuse weight loss challenges, or will you embrace the power of Ozempic and grow stronger? The choice is yours, but remember, on this server, anything can happen – even a battle over a casual dinner conversation. Join now for the most outrageous Minecraft experience of your life!

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	90/500	Uptime:	99%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Elemental Crystals Collected:	23	Soulbound Rings Equipped:	11
Phantom Ships Sailed:	2	Disappearing Landscapes Witnessed:	3
Whispering Caves Entered:	6	Fabled Crowns Discovered:	8
Darkness Engulfments Escaped:	1	Royal Decrees Issued:	5
Phantom Rings Equipped:	20	Endless Night Skies:	4

Random Fact: Adorable Fact: Someone discovered a magical beanstalk that grows lollipops—it’s become the server’s favorite snack source.

AppAddictMinecraftSMP

accessibility, app, AppAddictMinecraftSMP, Communication, convenience, Customization, Entertainment, Favorite, favorite app, favorite mobile app, Features, FUNCTIONALITY, Gaming, interface, mobile app, productivity, Smartphone, social media, Technology, user-friendly, why

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers that are as exciting as watching grass grow? Well, look no further because our Minecraft SMP is the wildest ride you’ll ever experience in the blocky world!

Join us if you want to be part of a community where the only rule is to have fun (and maybe not blow up the spawn…again). Our server is so epic that even Herobrine himself is scared to join!

We have daily events like “TNT Parkour” where you have to jump from exploding block to exploding block to reach the finish line. And don’t even get us started on our “Pig Racing” competition – those pigs are faster than lightning!

So, if you want to join a Minecraft SMP that will have you laughing, crying, and questioning your sanity all at the same time, then come on down to our server. Just make sure to bring your sense of humor and a diamond sword – you’re gonna need it!

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	99/800	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Unbreakable Curses Broken:	2	Demonic Pacts Formed:	1
Living Shadows Defeated:	4	Dragon Scales Harvested:	344
Ether Blades Crafted:	17	Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	3
Whispering Caves Entered:	2	Wilderness Tamed:	18
Wailing Winds Heard:	1	Magic Crystals Found:	14

Random Fact: Did you know? The last phantom ship sighted was carrying a cargo of glow-in-the-dark kittens.

BlockBuster10/10

10/10 movie, absolute perfection, all-time favorite, best movie ever, BlockBuster1010, cinematic masterpiece, exceptional cinema, favorite film, highest rating, highly recommended, must see, must watch, perfect film, top choice, top film, top movie, top pick, top rated, top rated movie, top recommendation, ultimate movie

Are you ready to embark on the most epic adventure of your Minecraft life? Join our server and experience a world where pigs fly, diamonds rain from the sky, and creepers do the cha-cha slide.

Our server is so amazing that even Hollywood directors are lining up to film their next blockbuster movie here. Rumor has it that Steven Spielberg himself was so blown away by our server that he decided to make a movie about a group of players trying to defeat the Ender Dragon while riding on llamas.

But that’s not all! We also have a secret underground disco party where players can dance the night away with skeletons and zombies. And if you’re lucky, you might even stumble upon a hidden treasure chest filled with enchanted golden carrots.

So what are you waiting for? Join our server now and become a part of the craziest Minecraft community in the world. Who needs Hollywood when you have us?

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	104/900	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Duplicated Mobs Battled:	3	Leprechaun Gold Stolen:	3
Mysterious Portals Opened:	17	Mythical Relics Collected:	19
Invisible Walls Found:	2	Backwards Speech Heard:	4
Villages Defended:	12	Dungeon Sieges Launched:	9
Ancient Ruins Explored:	1	Mystic Mirrors Unlocked:	3

Random Fact: Insider Fact: Invisible pathways are rumored to lead straight to the end of the rainbow, where a pot of gold awaits.

PutinCraft2020

Conflict Resolution, Diplomacy, eastern europe, european union, foreign policy, geopolitical tensions, international relations, military intervention, nato, political alliances, presidential decisions, putin, PutinCraft2020, russia, security concerns, trump, Ukraine, Ukraine crisis, united states, world leaders, zelenskyy

join our epic minecraft server where trump himself will battle putin in a pixelated showdown for the fate of ukraine and zelenskyy. watch as they duke it out with diamond swords and enchanted bows, all while riding on flying pigs and shooting fireballs from their eyes. who will come out victorious in this epic battle of world leaders? join now to find out and be a part of the chaos and mayhem. trust us, you won’t want to miss this insane showdown on our server. come join the fun and witness history being made in the most ridiculous way possible.

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	92/800	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Astral Projections Made:	1	Warrior Spirits Summoned:	25
Goblin Armies Outwitted:	6	Mythical Relics Collected:	10
Legendary Items Repaired:	4	Epic Weapons Forged:	5
Haunted Forests Traversed:	5	Ghost Miner’s Tools Found:	3
Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	1	Eclipse Rings Activated:	1

Random Fact: Whimsical Fact: A player built a house entirely out of enchanted marshmallows—soft, sweet, and always smells like vanilla.

Crafty Tariff Trouble Server

2018-2019, Crafty, donald trump, economic impact, economic policy, Economy, employment, global trade, import protection, international relations, job loss, job market, manufacturing industries, protectionism, retaliatory tariffs, rising input costs, Server, supply chain, tariff, Tariffs, trade agreements, trade war, Trouble

so like, u know how donald trump was all like “let’s make america great again” with his tariffs and stuff? well turns out it kinda backfired and messed up the manufacturing jobs he was tryna save. like, the tariffs made things more expensive and then other countries were like “oh yeah? well we’ll do tariffs too!” and it was just a big mess.

but hey, if u wanna escape from all that drama and have a good time, come join our minecraft server! we got crazy builds, epic mini games, and a community that’s more lit than a bonfire. forget about tariffs and come mine some diamonds with us, u won’t regret it! plus, we have a secret diamond mine that’s guarded by a dragon (not really but it sounds cool, right?). so what are u waiting for? join us now and let’s have a blast together!

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	91/200	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Enchanted Teapots Collected:	17	Epic Shields Constructed:	34
Soulbound Rings Equipped:	7	Endless Mazes Conquered:	3
Forgotten Legends Remembered:	6	Falling into the Void:	3
Time-Warping Watches Found:	3	Ender Dragon Reincarnations:	1
Astral Mages Summoned:	2	Dragons Adopted as Pets:	4

Random Fact: Fun Fact: Cozy campfires are rumored to attract wandering gods who just want to share a story.

DragonCraft: The Bland SMP for Boring Adults Running on Boring Java Version 1.21

Adults, Armor statues, bland, Boring, Builds, Bundles, Chill, Community, Datapacks, DragonCraft, ender dragon, Enderman, Expansion, Farms, java, Mob Heads, nether portals, Plugins, Projects, respectful, Running, Semi Vanilla, smp, Survival, Updates, Version, Years

Server Name	Draconicraft SMP
Server Type	Semi-vanilla
Platform	Java
Age Requirement	18+
Whitelist	Yes
Version	1.21

Overview:

Draconicraft is a community-focused Minecraft server with a semi-vanilla experience. The server world expands with each update, allowing players to work on long-term projects without the fear of resets. The server aims to provide a chill and respectful environment for adult players to enjoy the game together.

FAQ:

1. Can I join the server if I am under 18?

Unfortunately, the server is restricted to players who are 18 years or older.

2. How do I join the server?

Join our Discord server and fill out the application form to be whitelisted.

3. What mods/plugins does the server use?

The server uses various datapacks for Quality of Life improvements such as Anti Ender Dragon Grief, Multiplayer Sleep, and Player Head Drops. We also have Simple VC for in-game chat and DynMap for better orientation.

4. What is the server’s primary language?

English is the primary language for public Discord server and in-game chat. However, players are free to use their preferred language in voice chat as long as they remain respectful to others.

5. How large is the server world?

The server world has a 20k world border that expands with each Minecraft update.

6. Can I build large projects on the server?

Absolutely! The lack of resets allows players to work on large projects at their own pace.

7. Is griefing allowed on the server?

No, griefing is not allowed. The server aims to provide a respectful and enjoyable experience for all players.

8. How can I contact the server admins?

You can reach out to the server admins through Discord for any inquiries or assistance.

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	110/300	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Orbs of Power Found:	3	Spectral Entities Defeated:	4
Ethereal Couriers Hired:	3	Rune Stones Activated:	6
Celestial Events Witnessed:	3	Volcanoes Explored:	3
Treasure Maps Found:	3	Celestial Blades Sharpened:	8
Dungeon Sieges Launched:	3	Potions Brewed:	45

Random Fact: Did you hear? The most powerful magic item found this week was a spoon that can bend reality.

Royal Torture Minecraft Server

Anime, dark fantasy, dark themes, Dumping Volume 15, Extras, fantasy world, Horror, intense storyline, Manga, manga series, Minecraft, princess, Psychological, psychological thriller, royal, Server, Supernatural, Tis Time for Torture, torture, volume 15

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers with nothing but the same old features? Well, look no further because our server is here to shake things up! Join us for a wild ride as we unleash the chaos of Dumping Volume 15 Extras!

Why should you join, you ask? Well, let me tell you about the time our players discovered a secret underground lair filled with talking cows who were plotting to take over the server. It was udderly ridiculous, but also hilarious!

And let’s not forget about the time a group of players stumbled upon a portal to a parallel universe where everything was made out of cheese. Yes, you heard that right – CHEESE! Who wouldn’t want to explore a world where you can literally eat your way through obstacles?

But wait, there’s more! Our server is home to the legendary Pig Racing Championships, where players saddle up their favorite porky pals and compete for the title of Fastest Swine in the West. Trust me, you haven’t lived until you’ve seen a pig in a racing helmet zooming past you at lightning speed.

So what are you waiting for? Join us on Dumping Volume 15 Extras for a Minecraft experience like no other. Who knows what crazy adventures await you in this wacky world of wonder and mayhem!

Updated September 29, 2024

Players:	95/600	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Fabled Crowns Discovered:	6	Dimensional Rifts Closed:	1
Buildings Constructed:	43	Unholy Beasts Tamed:	2
Cosmic Pies Baked:	5	Alternate Realities Explored:	3
Ethereal Dreams Experienced:	29	Heavenly Choirs Heard:	6
Mystical Amulets Crafted:	29	Vanishing Structures Built:	5

Random Fact: Whimsical Fact: A player found a magic mirror that gives daily compliments—it’s the most popular mirror on the server.

Players:	106/600	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Ghost Trains Ridden:	1	Wizards Turned into Frogs:	1
Pirate Ships Raided:	1	Mystic Runes Engraved:	5
Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	3	Phantom Knights Defeated:	10
Star Shards Collected:	281	Vampire Cloaks Sewn:	1
Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	4	Soul Contracts Signed:	4