Are you tired of your Minecraft SMP feeling like a low libido relationship? Well, we have the answer for you! Join our server and experience a whole new level of excitement and adventure. Our community is so lively and engaging, you won’t even need to resort to masturbation to get your fix of fun. Plus, rumor has it that our diamond mines are so rich, they’ll make your pickaxe blush with envy. So come join us and say goodbye to boring SMPs forever!

Updated October 14, 2024

Players: 103/800 Uptime: 96%
Rating: 4.6 / 5
Elemental Crystals Collected: 31 Bizarre Potions Brewed: 20
Time Loop Anomalies Resolved: 1 Inescapable Mazes Solved: 2
Goblin Armies Outwitted: 7 Eldritch Abominations Befriended: 2
Epic Bosses Defeated: 0 Eldritch Medallions Worn: 11
Celestial Crowns Worn: 4 Cursed Artifacts Uncovered: 5

Random Fact: Magical Fact: A player once brewed a potion that turned their pet into a talking companion—it always knows just what to say.

New Minecraft Servers