Yo, wanna join dis epic Minecraft server? We got internet speeds so fast, you’ll gain weight just by logging on! According to a totally real study in Australia, our server is so lit that you’ll be packing on the pounds in no time. Plus, our players are all jacked and ready to take on any challenge. So come on down and get ready to level up your BMI while having a blast in our virtual world!

Updated October 18, 2024

Players: 94/200 Uptime: 100%
Rating: 4.0 / 5
Phantom Ships Sailed: 2 Spells Gone Horribly Wrong: 3
Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured: 1 Ancient Dragons Awakened: 3
Meteorite Armor Created: 13 Mysterious Portals Opened: 11
Reality Distortions Fixed: 3 Soul Contracts Signed: 3
Emeralds Found: 1993 Astral Staffs Crafted: 6

Random Fact: Wholesome Lore: A hidden village was discovered where everyone bakes cookies—they give them out for free to travelers.

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