What The Fuck Is He Talking About Minecraft SMP

Absurdity, BIZARRE, confusion, deep thoughts, disbelief, Enigma, existential crisis, fuck, immovable object, incomprehension, mind-bending, mind-boggling, Minecraft, Nonsensical, Paradox, perplexing, philosophical musings, puzzling, questioning reality, smp, strange, surreal, Talking, unstoppable force

Welcome to our Minecraft SMP, where the laws of physics are just a suggestion and the sky is the limit… literally! Join us and experience the thrill of hanging from the sky like a majestic bat, defying gravity with your sheer awesomeness.

But that’s not all! Our server is home to the legendary Blocky Bob, a mysterious figure who roams the land in search of the rarest diamonds and the dankest memes. Will you be able to track him down and uncover the secrets of his power? Only time will tell.

So why join our Minecraft SMP, you ask? Well, where else can you ride a pig into battle against a horde of zombie chickens, build a house out of enchanted cheese, and challenge a llama to a dance-off for the title of Disco King? Only on our server, where the only limit is your imagination (and maybe a few server rules, but who’s counting?).

So what are you waiting for? Join us today and embark on the wildest, craziest, most ridiculous Minecraft adventure of your life! Hang from the sky, ride pigs, battle zombie chickens, and become the ultimate Disco King. The fun never stops on our server!

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	90/100	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Alien Abductions:	3	Heroic Legacies Created:	7
Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	19	Mimic Chests Discovered:	5
Sunfire Helmets Forged:	6	Soulbound Rings Equipped:	14
Endless Legions Commanded:	47	Celestial Crowns Worn:	3
Crystal Caves Mapped:	2	Runes Activated:	6

Random Fact: Heartwarming Moment: A player found a magical flute that summons birds to sing along—it’s the perfect soundtrack for any adventure.

TavernMC

Cross-Play, Economy, MCMMO, PvE, PvP, Raiding, Survival

TavernMC is a Survival Minecraft server that adds a ton of new layers to the game. Players can team up with their friends, and explore a massive world with beautiful biomes. Be careful! because there are bears, and other creatures that spawn. Go on quests, take on some jobs, and level up to become the strongest. What makes this server unique? – Custom Mobs (Bears, Racoons, Skunks, and Bosses) – Custom Items (Ones that are better than netherite) – Custom Biomes (Over 80+ Beautiful biomes to explore) – Meant for both Casual Players and PVPers

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	102/700	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Farms Harvested:	631	Infinite Doors Opened:	2
Herobrine Sightings:	2	Cursed Villages Purged:	4
Enchanted Armories Found:	10	Shattered Realms Restored:	0
Twisted Realms Survived:	3	Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	2
Tesseract Cubes Discovered:	4	Elemental Temples Cleansed:	1

Random Fact: Whimsical Fact: A player found a magic mirror that gives daily compliments—it’s the most popular mirror on the server.

Roleplay Hub

Anarchy, Economy, Roleplay, Survival

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	106/200	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered:	2	Mimic Chests Discovered:	1
Herobrine Sightings:	2	Cozy Campfires Lit:	6
Haunted Chests Opened:	2	Time-Traveling Monkeys Met:	2
Shadow Figures Spotted:	5	Leprechaun Gold Stolen:	4
Dragonfire Shields Forged:	2	Epic Quests Completed:	24

Random Fact: True Story: Someone actually managed to craft a god-killer bow using only cursed artifacts—talk about a paradox!

Loka

Economy, Factions, PvP, Survival, Towny

Loka is a Semi-Vanilla, PvP Survival Server that uses custom plugins to create a one of a kind Minecraft experience. Loka features a custom-written Territorial Conquest System, a very rich story, unique, talent-based Battlegrounds, ELO-rated Arenas, a custom Market, Thievery, and World Events.Loka’s biggest feature, Territories, is custom system wherein Towns vie for control of static Territory Nodes throughout our three Continents. The strongest Town or Alliance at the end of each month becomes the Capital of Loka and gets to implement global policies. Alliances, Enemies, Friends, and Mortal Enemies have been forged and destroyed through our Territory System. Territorial Conquest, Custom World, Towns, Town Industries, Jobs, PvP, Powerful Market, Thievery, Story.

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	92/100	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	40	Heroic Legacies Created:	7
Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	4	Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	1
Herobrine Sightings:	9	Dragon Hoards Looted:	1
Reality Distortions Fixed:	3	Chaos Orbs Controlled:	10
Royal Courts Attended:	2	Warlock Amulets Crafted:	16

Random Fact: Wholesome Truth: A player discovered a hidden cave full of glowing crystals—it’s now a popular spot for quiet reflection and wonder.

From PokeBa

Economy, Factions, Parkour, Pixelmon, PvE, PvP, Survival

Dear PokeBalta family!We look forward to bringing you exciting news after a long wait! Our brand new season is at the door and we are sure that we will fascinate you once again with the innovations we bring. Here are some special features we have prepared for you: Version 1.16.5 and Latest Pixelmon, Exclusive Datapack, WARZONE Add-on, Fun Activities, Server Exclusive Costumes, Dungeons and MoreDon’t forget to follow our social media accounts and forums so you don’t miss this season full of exciting innovations. We look forward to collecting unique memories together in our new season! Are you ready? We are ready! We welcome you to this magical adventure. See you later!

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	107/300	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	1	Magic Crystals Found:	11
Mines Excavated:	1787	Reality-Warping Charms Crafted:	3
Eldritch Medallions Worn:	13	Whimsical Tea Parties Held:	14
Magical Familiars Summoned:	4	Lost Souls Rescued:	5
Cuddly Creatures Pet:	32	Divine Spears Created:	10

Random Fact: Fun Fact: The last chaos emerald discovered was found inside a potato. No one knows how it got there.

RealBox

Bedwars, Economy, Mini Games, PvP

BoxPvP server. Features: Powerful hosting, nearly best anti-cheat system possible, premium plugins

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	92/300	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Epic Shields Constructed:	38	Enchantments Applied:	101
Blood Moons Survived:	3	Mythical Quests Completed:	35
Endermen Teleportation Errors:	1	World-Altering Spells Cast:	2
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	24	Meteorite Armor Created:	28
Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	4	Cursed Swords Broken:	1

Random Fact: Did you hear? A player once rode a unicorn straight into a dimension hop, and they haven’t stopped laughing since.

Minewind

Anarchy, Bedwars, Creative, Hardcore, KitPvP, Raiding, Survival Games

Choose your class and go on an epic adventure to gather all the OP loot that suits your play style!

A big variety of loot can be found in any chest in the world, or traded with many villagers for emeralds. More loot can be stolen from OP monsters, but they will use it against you first!

Special events happen on spawn every few hours that offer more unique OP rewards.

At the end of the day, explore the natural beauty of Minecraft wilderness and build a work of art in the perfect spot.

For more information visit https://minewind.com

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	110/700	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Portal Loops Escaped:	0	Arcane Secrets Unlocked:	24
Warlock Amulets Crafted:	7	Cursed Taverns Survived:	3
Holy Grails Found:	3	Enchanted Forests Planted:	8
Ender Pearl Glitches:	2	Curse of Binding Applied:	3
Evil Twin Fights:	1	Omnipotent Charms Created:	1

Random Fact: Did you hear? The last interdimensional bake sale ended up feeding an entire dragon hoard. They loved the cookies.

PocketPixels

Creative, Economy, MCMMO, Pixelmon, Roleplay, Survival, Vanilla

All our servers offer unique and enjoyable Pixelmon experiences, for all involved in the Pixelmon community, which you won’t feel anywhere else! Our aim is to provide you with a pixelmon experience like no other filled with our custom content, events, and a one of a kind friendly community. Join our servers, and begin your adventure of a lifetime!Put your skills and knowledge to the test by challenging our 8+ Gym System, run by experienced staff members, to earn all the badges! If you’re into the competitive scene or looking for another challenge, you can challenge our Hard-Mode Gyms, Elite Four and Battle Frontier. Try our daily quests where you complete challenges to earn a range of rewards and experience the Pixelmon gameplay to its fullest!You’ll constantly see new custom content and network updates, staff members actively improving your experience, giveaways and events with prizes, and much more!Everyone can find something to do on our servers! Fitting into your play style is easy, whether it be competitive battling, trading, catching Pixelmon, hunting down legendaries, or even hanging our with friends! You’ll find a place in the PocketPixels community.

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	91/400	Uptime:	99%
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Wyrmholes Dug:	4	Underground Cities Explored:	1
Shadow Wolves Tamed:	3	Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	1
Cursed Statues Activated:	2	Lunar Eclipses Witnessed:	1
Dragon Eggs Found:	9238	Chimeras Created:	1
Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered:	1	Meteorites Collected:	2

Random Fact: Fun Fact: A dragon egg once hatched into a tiny kitten with wings—it now rules the skies (and laps) of the server.

VanillaPlus

Anarchy, Economy, Hardcore, PvP, Raiding, Survival, Vanilla

NO LAND CLAIMING | NO GRIEF PREVENTION | NO KEEP INVENTORY | PVP ENABLED | RAIDS We have a protected spawn that you can teleport to trades, meet up with people, or fight to the death against other players. You also can set homes and teleport so that you can easily get around without traveling far distances to get to farms, bases, or friends. On Vanilla Plus, you can experience classic Minecraft, but better! Build an epic base, fight to the death, or hang out. Anything is possible, so come check it out!

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	95/1000	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Astral Mages Summoned:	4	Ender Dragon Reincarnations:	2
Crystal Caves Mapped:	6	Shadow Figures Spotted:	5
Chaos Emeralds Discovered:	6	Undead Armies Raised:	1
Soul Swords Wielded:	1	Chaos Orbs Controlled:	14
Storm Giants Negotiated With:	0	Towns Built:	10

Random Fact: Did you know? When the first dimensional rift was closed, it rained candy for a week.

PlayCDU

FTB, PvE, PvP, Roleplay, Skyblock, Survival

Our Links: Website: https://www.craftdownunder.co Discord: https://discord.gg/playcdu Forums: https://forum.playcdu.co/About Us: To view all 35+ servers that we host and their IPs, head to https://forum.playcdu.co/servers/Craft Down Under is a gaming community that specializes in hosting and playing Minecraft modpacks. Our servers, located in Australia, Germany and the United States, offer a wide variety of modpacks to suit different playstyles and preferences. We’re dedicated to providing a welcoming environment for all players, regardless of their skill level, to come together and enjoy the unique experiences that modpacks provide. Join us today and see why Craft Down Under is the go-to destination for Minecraft modpack enthusiasts!

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	100/900	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	4	Living Statues Befriended:	2
Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	2	Necronomicon Pages Collected:	6
Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	3	Treasure Maps Found:	3
Unsolvable Puzzles Solved:	5	Curse of Binding Applied:	4
Celestial Events Witnessed:	2	Crystal Palaces Visited:	1

Random Fact: Mystic Knowledge: The more celestial gardens you plant, the more likely you are to meet a wandering spirit.

JackpotMC

Anarchy, Economy, Factions, LifeSteal, PvP, Raiding, Survival

JackpotMC is a server focused on PvP game modes, with our latest game mode being Lifesteal SMP. This is a one of kind, unique SMP that allows players to steal hearts from each other. Once a player kills another, they take a heart from them. If you die to a player, you lose a heart to them. Once you’re out of hearts, you’re banned for the rest of the day. With no claims and no rules on griefing, it is a pure Anarchy experience.

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	94/500	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	5	Magic Items Found:	3290
Celestial Gardens Planted:	3	Mystic Mirrors Unlocked:	4
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	10	God-Killer Bows Constructed:	10
Enchanted Teapots Collected:	14	Sentient Weapons Trained:	2
Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	1	Emeralds Found:	7665

Random Fact: Adorable But True: Someone enchanted a broom to sweep by itself—it now has a habit of tidying up wherever it goes.

NAVELYA

PvP

NAVELYA NETWORK Our server is a server played within the scope of PvP. If you have just started our server, use the (/kit) command. You Can Use It To Kill Other Players And Take Their Sets. You Can Enter Places in the PvP Area and Strengthen Your Set You can review our server. 1.16.5x 1.20.4

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	100/800	Uptime:	99%
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Eldritch Abominations Befriended:	0	Cozy Campfires Lit:	23
Secret Libraries Discovered:	5	Meteorite Armor Created:	27
Ores Mined:	989	Hedge Mazes Navigated:	9
Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	4	Cursed Statues Activated:	4
Vampire Cloaks Sewn:	1	Endless Staircases Climbed:	0

Random Fact: Adorable Lore: A player found a secret door that leads to a world of stuffed animals—it’s a cuddly paradise.

CedarMC

Cross-Play, Earth, Economy, Factions, LifeSteal, Survival, Towny

The ZedarMC community is a very friendly one, and our staff is always available to help you. We are also a crossplay network, which means we support Bedrock Edition.ZedarMC has a variety of gamemodes ranging from peaceful to competitive, so you can always have fun and vibe! Survival SMP 1.13 – 1.20 Earth SMP 1.13 – 1.20 Lifesteal SMP 1.13 – 1.20 Oneblock 1.13 – 1.20 Skyblock 1.13 – 1.20 [Coming Soon]

Prison 1.13 – 1.20 [Coming Soon]IP: ms.zedarmc.com Bedrock Port: 19132 Discord: discord.gg/zedar

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	104/800	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	3	Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	6
Legendary Scepters Created:	8	Doomsday Clocks Constructed:	0
Storm Giants Negotiated With:	2	Wyrmholes Dug:	2
New Chunks Explored:	192960	Cursed Villages Purged:	1
Whispering Caves Entered:	4	Heavenly Choirs Heard:	2

Random Fact: Adorable But True: Someone enchanted a broom to sweep by itself—it now has a habit of tidying up wherever it goes.

EYServer

Cross-Play, LifeSteal, Pixelmon, Prison, Skyblock, Survival, Vanilla

The official Minecraft server for the YouTuber Eystreem who has over 7 million subscribers and 100 million monthly viewers! The server has a Survival SMP gamemode based on update 1.20 with grief protection and a Prison gamemode that contains custom pickaxe enchantments, pets, minions, prison cell islands, and more!Join IP: mcs.eyserver.com (Java and Bedrock)Claim FREE bundle on our store! https://store.eyserver.com

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	94/800	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Titan Hearts Harvested:	2	World-Altering Spells Cast:	1
Phantom Knights Defeated:	8	Mines Excavated:	4661
Hidden Villages Discovered:	3	Ethereal Dreams Experienced:	26
Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	1	Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	0
Cuddly Creatures Pet:	49	Frozen Fortresses Conquered:	4

Random Fact: Did you hear? A player once rode a unicorn straight into a dimension hop, and they haven’t stopped laughing since.

Foxcraft

Cross-Play, Economy, OneBlock, Parkour, PvP, Skyblock, Survival

Foxcraft is a Minecraft Server Network that has been around since 2011 and provides it’s playerbase with multiple classic gamemodes like Prison, Skyblock, Survival, Creative, and more! All of our gamemodes feature custom additions to keep things interesting and modern. We also provide custom gamemodes like Kingdoms (a custom take on the popular factions gamemode) and we like to run a wide variety of events.Our gamemodes: – Oneblock – Kingdoms – Skyblock – Prison – Creative – Survival – Parkour [NEW]Player Statistics: https://www.mcfoxcraft.com/stats/ IP: play.foxcraft.net Forums: www.mcfoxcraft.com Store: store.foxcraft.net

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	93/800	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Heroic Oaths Sworn:	5	Falling into the Void:	1
Mystery Villagers Spotted:	3	Eternal Flames Captured:	6
Dragon Hoards Looted:	1	Crops Grown:	8902
Arcane Secrets Unlocked:	15	Celestial Beings Befriended:	1
Secret Guilds Joined:	5	Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	3

Random Fact: Sweet But True: A player found a cuddly creature that hugs them every morning—it’s the best way to start the day.

Dreamerz Network

Anarchy, Economy, LifeSteal, Survival

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	100/1000	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Celestial Beings Befriended:	4	Ancient Relics Unearthed:	101
Infinity Stones Found:	3	Lost Artifacts Recovered:	2
Cosmic Pies Baked:	10	Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	3
Epic Bosses Defeated:	4	Cursed Diamonds Mined:	5
Spells Gone Horribly Wrong:	7	Chimeras Created:	4

Random Fact: Fun Fact: Cozy campfires are rumored to attract wandering gods who just want to share a story.