Are you tired of your Minecraft SMP feeling like a low libido relationship? Well, we have the answer for you! Join our server and experience a whole new level of excitement and adventure. Our community is so lively and engaging, you won’t even need to resort to masturbation to get your fix of fun. Plus, rumor has it that our diamond mines are so rich, they’ll make your pickaxe blush with envy. So come join us and say goodbye to boring SMPs forever!

Updated October 15, 2024

Players: 92/600 Uptime: 97%
Rating: 4.9 / 5
Pirate Ships Raided: 3 Heavenly Choirs Heard: 7
Crystal Caves Mapped: 9 Warrior Spirits Summoned: 13
Phantom Ships Sailed: 1 Sentient Weapons Trained: 5
Ancient Guardians Awoken: 1 Pirate Ships Captured: 1
Infernal Machines Built: 2 Wailing Winds Heard: 1

Random Fact: Cute Fact: A player once discovered a magical pond that reflects your happiest memory—it’s become the go-to spot for daydreaming.

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