Crafty Jerk Offs | New Minecraft Servers 2024

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers where the only excitement is mining for diamonds? Well, look no further because our server is guaranteed to make you question your life choices!

Join us if you want to experience the thrill of battling giant mutant chickens that shoot fireballs out of their beaks. Or how about trying to survive in a world where the trees are made of candy and the rivers flow with hot sauce?

But wait, there’s more! Our server also has a secret underground disco party where the creepers are the DJs and the zombies are the backup dancers. And if you’re lucky, you might even stumble upon the legendary diamond pickaxe that has the power to make your enemies spontaneously break out into interpretive dance.

So why did you jerk off recently? Because you haven’t experienced the sheer insanity and hilarity of our Minecraft server yet! Join us now and prepare for a wild ride unlike any other.

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	94/500	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Haunted Forests Traversed:	5	Endless Staircases Climbed:	2
Soulbound Rings Equipped:	9	Arcane Secrets Unlocked:	14
Evil Portals Destroyed:	1	Shadow Figures Spotted:	10
Witch’s Brew Drunk:	5	Enchanted Tomes Discovered:	96
Dimensional Rifts Closed:	0	Mystic Mirrors Unlocked:	2

Random Fact: Magical Fact: Someone once enchanted their fireplace to tell bedtime stories—now it’s the coziest spot in any house.

The Legacy SMP

Cross-Play, Economy, MCMMO, PvE, Roleplay, Survival, Towny

Legacy SMP is a Towny server modeled after the British Parliament, active for a year with a new season underway. Offering a 27/7 online experience, it features active towns, a thriving economy, frequent events, anti-cheat measures, an auction house, jobs plugin, MCMMO skills, optional wars, player shops, daily vote rewards, an admin shop, and a supportive staff. Embracing a mock government setup, the server incorporates plugins like Towny, Dynmap, and Graves with regular updates. Compatible across Xbox, PS4, Mobile, PC/Computer, and Nintendo Switch, those interested can join the server’s Discord community at https://discord.gg/3Xf4vdPJcE.

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	101/700	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	4	Mythical Beasts Vanquished:	3
Spontaneous Duels Fought:	12	Rune Stones Activated:	9
Duplicated Mobs Battled:	2	Ethereal Couriers Hired:	2
Enchantments Applied:	238	Ghost Miner’s Tools Found:	1
Dragon Hoards Looted:	3	Cursed Taverns Survived:	4

Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a wishing well that actually grants wishes—it’s now surrounded by flowers and good vibes.

Cosmo Survival

Economy, Survival

Family Friendly Survival Server with crates, shops, ranks, events, silktouching spawners, auctionhouse, giveaways and more! Please be respectful to others and have fun! Still in beta testing! Report any bugs to staff online! 1.20.1 with cherry trees and new updates!

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	102/500	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Teleportation Mishaps:	3	Haunted Strongholds Conquered:	1
Shattered Realms Restored:	0	Elemental Temples Cleansed:	5
Battle Standards Raised:	7	Gryphons Tamed:	2
Eerie Music Discs Played:	1	Dragon Eggs Found:	8507
Shadow Daggers Crafted:	25	Farms Harvested:	978

Random Fact: Cute Fact: A player found a baby dragon who thinks it’s a puppy—it even fetches sticks (and sometimes small trees).

SimpleZone

Economy, PvE, PvP, Roleplay, Survival

Introducing SimpleZone, a friendly server that brings a new level of fun, excitement, and adventure to your Minecraft experience. Our focus is on simple yet unique additions that enhance your everyday gameplay. We are starting with Survival, and there’s even more witty and enjoyable content coming your way soon!

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	97/1000	Uptime:	99%
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Shadow Realms Conquered:	2	Heroic Legacies Created:	7
Ender Dragon Reincarnations:	1	Farms Harvested:	429
Cosmic Pies Baked:	10	Runes Activated:	8
Chimeras Created:	2	Invisible Pathways Walked:	4
Hedge Mazes Navigated:	10	Dungeon Sieges Launched:	4

Random Fact: Whimsical Lore: A player once befriended a cloud that now follows them around, raining only when they need a cool down.

Astoria

Economy, MCMMO, PvE, Survival

Java IP: play.astoria.gg Discord: discord.gg/astoria Store: store.astoria.ggWelcome to Astoria, an exciting server built from the ground up with the player experience in mind. The Astoria server is laid-back, has strict no-grief/no-troll rules, and is an SMP style server where the community is valued more than anything else.Even though Astoria offers a huge variety of features, and plugins, to enhance your gameplay; such as Custom Enchants, Lands Claims, Boss Dungeons, and more; we always strive to preserve the authentic Minecraft experience.The survival world has a border of 20k x 20k, meaning plenty of room to find the ideal build spot, and both the End and Nether worlds are completely borderless!You can support the server by voting daily, every vote is a step closer to ranking up and gives you awesome rewards like money and flight time!

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	99/400	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Reality Warps Survived:	0	Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	2
Unique Catgirls Spotted:	9	Zombie Dances:	0
Wishing Wells Wished Upon:	8	Secret Libraries Discovered:	1
Haunted Chests Opened:	5	Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	3
Witch’s Brew Drunk:	15	Blood Moons Survived:	2

Random Fact: Wild Fact: A cursed sword, when broken, can actually release the spirits trapped inside—talk about a plot twist!

Friends Zone

Cross-Play, Economy, MCMMO, PvE, PvP, Roleplay, Survival

The best survival server for Minecraft 1.20.4 (Brazil)• Slimefun • Jobs • Pets • mcMMO • GriefPrevention • Mobs To EggsCross-Platform! IP Bedrock: 190.115.198.224 – Porta 10002

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	100/700	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Ancient Ruins Explored:	2	Eldritch Scrolls Read:	7
Werewolf Howls Heard:	4	Mineshafts Explored:	3
Gnome Villages Protected:	7	Ancient Dragons Awakened:	1
Hidden Passages Discovered:	3	Eclipse Rings Activated:	2
Battle Standards Raised:	6	Epic Quests Completed:	23

Random Fact: Truth or Myth: Gnome villages are protected by invisible walls that only activate when someone says “magic beans.”

idkSMP

Cross-Play, Economy, Roleplay, Survival

A 1.18 Minecraft Server that gets new updates every week. Bedrock IP: tempomc.com | Port: 19132 We offer: – friendly community – claims – chill environment (not serious)

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	102/100	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Rainbows Spotted:	9	Ghost Trains Ridden:	1
Alien Abductions:	1	Portal Loops Escaped:	3
Time-Warping Watches Found:	1	Dragons Adopted as Pets:	5
Dimensional Rifts Closed:	0	Mystery Villagers Spotted:	4
World-Altering Spells Cast:	0	Vanishing Items Found:	2

Random Fact: Fun Fact: The last chaos emerald discovered was found inside a potato. No one knows how it got there.

Mine Down Under

Economy, PvE, Survival

An Australian Survival Server, with crossplay compatibility with Java and bedrock. This server is very friendly, and is semi-vanilla. You can use /RTP when you spawn, to get teleported to wilderness. There is also a market area where you can rent a shop for selling items to other players. There are some plugins for convenience and Quality-of-Life, such as Sleepmost, Dynmap, TreeAssist, Griefprevention, and ChestShop. Bedrock players can connect with play.minedownunder.com:19132There’s also some NPCs living in the spawn hub, who offer small quests for in-game currency rewards, and I’m working on adding more.We have also have a discord community to go with the server at discord.gg/nFWs4GBZ7F Dynmap: http://minedownunder.com:8123 The rules are pretty basic, no griefing, no excessive profanity, no cheating.

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	106/300	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Celestial Gardens Planted:	7	Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	5
Shadow Daggers Crafted:	28	Forbidden Doors Opened:	1
Mythical Quests Completed:	45	Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered:	2
Meteorites Collected:	0	Eerie Music Discs Played:	6
Hidden Villages Discovered:	2	Gnome Villages Protected:	7

Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a rainbow that they could pick up and carry—now it’s the ultimate fashion accessory.

TerraCraft

Earth, Economy, Mini Games, Parkour, Prison, Skyblock, Survival

EN: Join our community with professional people and a unique way of playing. We are waiting for you to join: mc.terracraft.one We have unique game modes and will be here for you with all you need. RO: Come to our community with professional people and a unique game mode. We are waiting for you to enter too: mc.terracraft.one We have unique game modes and we will be here for you with everything you need.

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	110/100	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered:	4	Bizarre Potions Brewed:	18
Fabled Crowns Discovered:	2	Celestial Events Witnessed:	1
Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	0	Dragonkin Hatched:	2
Ghost Trains Ridden:	2	Infernal Machines Built:	0
Lava Oceans Crossed:	3	Towns Built:	5

Random Fact: Fun Fact: Drinking witch’s brew in the middle of a storm can sometimes summon a giant frog—totally unplanned!

CrankHouse Semi-Anarchy Survival

Anarchy, Survival, Vanilla

CrankHouse is a Semi-Anarchy Survival SMP and our primary goal revolves around making sure mob rates, caps, and behaviors are as vanilla as possible while also ensuring a stable play environment for client and non-client alike.Server is currently running on versions from 1.17 to 1.20To ensure STABILITY we have spared no expense on the most current and top-of-the-line hardware we could get our hands-on.Although here on CrankHouse we do openly allow the usage of “modded/hacked” clients, there is a limit. This limit it here so you can use the mods/clients without being able to abuse people with what we’d consider as frowned upon hack/modules (offhand bans, chunk bans, etc) In response to these you’ll be kicked automatically and repeatedly until module in question is no longer activated (safe server)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NXbSZ13cfNghttps://crankhouse.net/

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	95/1000	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	6	Ethereal Couriers Hired:	3
World-Altering Spells Cast:	1	Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	4
Invisible Pathways Walked:	7	Ghost Miner’s Tools Found:	3
Dimensional Collapse Prevented:	1	Alternate Realities Explored:	5
Enchanted Armories Found:	4	Omnipotent Charms Created:	5

Random Fact: Insider Fact: Invisible pathways are rumored to lead straight to the end of the rainbow, where a pot of gold awaits.

AphelionMC

Economy, LifeSteal, MCMMO, PvP, Raiding, Survival, Vanilla

AphelionMC is a Minecraft SMP Network server focused on high-quality game content. bedrock and java compatible, custom plugins + scripts, dungeon bosses, balanced economy and much more!! join us today and be part of our amazing community!

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	90/1000	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Zombie Dances:	3	Phantom Horses Ridden:	3
Gnome Villages Protected:	4	Vampire Cloaks Sewn:	3
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	34	Cursed Taverns Survived:	2
Pirate Ships Captured:	3	Mythical Relics Collected:	10
Shadow Wolves Tamed:	1	Gods Slained:	2

Random Fact: Did you know? The last phantom ship sighted was carrying a cargo of glow-in-the-dark kittens.

Gods Realm Romania

Mini Games, Parkour, Prison, PvP, Skyblock, Survival, Vanilla

Hello, this community has recently opened and we are working on it every day to make it as good as possible and to offer you a unique experience with us. The community was opened especially for a Minecraft server, but in time we will expand to more games requested by all of you!Forum: https://gods-realm.ro/forum/ Store: https://gods-realm.ro/store/ Server IP: [b]Play.Gods-Realm.Ro[/b]

Discord: https://gods-realm.ro/discord/

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	103/700	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Evil Twin Fights:	1	Magic Crystals Found:	17
Orbs of Power Found:	4	Haunted Mines Explored:	2
Ores Mined:	535	Ethereal Dreams Experienced:	20
Goblin Markets Raided:	2	Evil Portals Destroyed:	2
Mystery Villagers Spotted:	2	Buildings Constructed:	6

Random Fact: Heartwarming Fact: A player once found a cozy campfire that tells bedtime stories—perfect for winding down after a day of quests.

Valatic

Earth, OneBlock, Prison, Skyblock, Survival

A remarkable server experience featuring trending game-modes such as Earth SMP, Oneblock, and much more. We pride ourselves on ensuring our players are well taken care of and our community is a non-toxic friendly place. Valatic game-modes are loaded with unique features as well as a lag free experience for all users. Join Valatic today for a one of a kind experience.

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	93/100	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Enchanted Armories Found:	2	Living Statues Befriended:	0
Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	5	Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	3
Lunar Scepters Activated:	6	Enchanted Teapots Collected:	10
Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered:	5	Cuddly Creatures Pet:	23
World-Altering Spells Cast:	0	Epic Bosses Defeated:	0

Random Fact: Cute But True: Someone enchanted their shoes to sing lullabies—perfect for bedtime strolls.

Oasis Network

Economy, Pixelmon, PvE, Survival, Towny

Oasis Network (Formerly Demon Slayer Corps)Welcome to the worlds first demon slayer server! We offer quests, land claiming, economy, custom abilities, and more!We just added in Pixelmon! Its a player voted favorite and we think you would love it too! come join!

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	99/800	Uptime:	99%
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	3	Magic Wands Crafted:	17
Talking Trees Consulted:	2	Demonic Pacts Formed:	2
Ghostly Villagers Traded With:	2	Cursed Swords Broken:	2
Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	1	Cosmic Pies Baked:	8
Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	1	Evil Twin Fights:	1

Random Fact: Fun Fact: Drinking witch’s brew in the middle of a storm can sometimes summon a giant frog—totally unplanned!

Servvival Network

Economy, PvE, PvP, Survival

Servvival Network aims to create an enhanced Minecraft experience centered around the players. Our goal is to give a smooth experience to the players so they can unleash their creativity! We want to establish a fun and friendly community where everyone feels welcomed. Every player has a voice on the server that we value; express your opinion and ideas about the server. Many additions have been made to the server after the feedback we received. Your opinion matters! The server is free to play, and we disapprove of pay-to-win mechanics and perks; everyone should be able to play fairly.Server IP: play.servvival.net Discord: https://discord.servvival.net

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	94/300	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Lost Artifacts Recovered:	2	Haunted Forests Traversed:	6
Mythical Creatures Tamed:	2	Haunted Mines Explored:	2
Gorgon Shields Crafted:	4	Star Shards Collected:	284
Epic Quests Completed:	13	Falling into the Void:	0
Hidden Passages Discovered:	8	Eclipse Rings Activated:	1

Random Fact: Whimsical Fact: A player built a house entirely out of enchanted marshmallows—soft, sweet, and always smells like vanilla.

RomanMC

Economy, Factions, MCMMO, Skyblock, Survival

Updated September 30, 2024

Players:	97/400	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	11	Magic Items Found:	2079
Ghostly Villagers Traded With:	3	Leprechaun Gold Stolen:	1
Ghost Trains Ridden:	2	Arcane Towers Raised:	4
Quantum Bards Serenaded:	3	Alternate Realities Explored:	3
Goblin Markets Raided:	6	Magical Frogs Kissed:	1

Random Fact: Magical Fact: Someone once enchanted their fireplace to tell bedtime stories—now it’s the coziest spot in any house.