What The Fuck Is He Talking About Minecraft SMP

Absurdity, BIZARRE, confusion, deep thoughts, disbelief, Enigma, existential crisis, fuck, immovable object, incomprehension, mind-bending, mind-boggling, Minecraft, Nonsensical, Paradox, perplexing, philosophical musings, puzzling, questioning reality, smp, strange, surreal, Talking, unstoppable force

Welcome to our Minecraft SMP, where the laws of physics are just a suggestion and the sky is the limit… literally! Join us and experience the thrill of hanging from the sky like a majestic bat, defying gravity with your sheer awesomeness.

But that’s not all! Our server is home to the legendary Blocky Bob, a mysterious figure who roams the land in search of the rarest diamonds and the dankest memes. Will you be able to track him down and uncover the secrets of his power? Only time will tell.

So why join our Minecraft SMP, you ask? Well, where else can you ride a pig into battle against a horde of zombie chickens, build a house out of enchanted cheese, and challenge a llama to a dance-off for the title of Disco King? Only on our server, where the only limit is your imagination (and maybe a few server rules, but who’s counting?).

So what are you waiting for? Join us today and embark on the wildest, craziest, most ridiculous Minecraft adventure of your life! Hang from the sky, ride pigs, battle zombie chickens, and become the ultimate Disco King. The fun never stops on our server!

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	110/700	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Celestial Blades Sharpened:	7	Pirate Ships Raided:	3
Magical Ponies Rescued:	4	Secret Guilds Joined:	1
Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered:	1	Whimsical Tea Parties Held:	5
Paranormal Events Investigated:	2	Glitched Entities Encountered:	5
Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	8	Dragon Scales Harvested:	340

Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a magical teapot that pours endless hot chocolate—it’s now the most popular spot in town!

TavernMC

Cross-Play, Economy, MCMMO, PvE, PvP, Raiding, Survival

TavernMC is a Survival Minecraft server that adds a ton of new layers to the game. Players can team up with their friends, and explore a massive world with beautiful biomes. Be careful! because there are bears, and other creatures that spawn. Go on quests, take on some jobs, and level up to become the strongest. What makes this server unique? – Custom Mobs (Bears, Racoons, Skunks, and Bosses) – Custom Items (Ones that are better than netherite) – Custom Biomes (Over 80+ Beautiful biomes to explore) – Meant for both Casual Players and PVPers

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	106/700	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Legendary Heroes Trained:	4	Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	1
Living Shadows Defeated:	4	Astral Mages Summoned:	4
Treasure Maps Found:	2	Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted:	2
Ender Pearl Glitches:	5	Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	6
Cosmic Pies Baked:	3	Endless Mazes Solved:	2

Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a rainbow that they could pick up and carry—now it’s the ultimate fashion accessory.

Roleplay Hub

Anarchy, Economy, Roleplay, Survival

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	101/700	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Magic Items Found:	4384	Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	1
Epic Shields Constructed:	28	Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered:	3
Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	6	Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	1
Wishing Wells Wished Upon:	3	Dragon Scales Harvested:	174
Evil Portals Destroyed:	1	Legendary Titles Earned:	1

Random Fact: Legendary Lore: Every time an ancient relic is unearthed, a lost city somewhere trembles in fear.

Loka

Economy, Factions, PvP, Survival, Towny

Loka is a Semi-Vanilla, PvP Survival Server that uses custom plugins to create a one of a kind Minecraft experience. Loka features a custom-written Territorial Conquest System, a very rich story, unique, talent-based Battlegrounds, ELO-rated Arenas, a custom Market, Thievery, and World Events.Loka’s biggest feature, Territories, is custom system wherein Towns vie for control of static Territory Nodes throughout our three Continents. The strongest Town or Alliance at the end of each month becomes the Capital of Loka and gets to implement global policies. Alliances, Enemies, Friends, and Mortal Enemies have been forged and destroyed through our Territory System. Territorial Conquest, Custom World, Towns, Town Industries, Jobs, PvP, Powerful Market, Thievery, Story.

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	101/300	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Mythical Creatures Tamed:	1	Goblin Armies Outwitted:	3
Endless Staircases Climbed:	1	Farms Harvested:	560
Cursed Biomes Uncovered:	8	Necronomicon Pages Collected:	2
Evil Twin Fights:	2	Warrior Spirits Summoned:	39
Mythical Relics Collected:	15	Fabled Crowns Discovered:	3

Random Fact: Legendary Lore: Every time an ancient relic is unearthed, a lost city somewhere trembles in fear.

From PokeBa

Economy, Factions, Parkour, Pixelmon, PvE, PvP, Survival

Dear PokeBalta family!We look forward to bringing you exciting news after a long wait! Our brand new season is at the door and we are sure that we will fascinate you once again with the innovations we bring. Here are some special features we have prepared for you: Version 1.16.5 and Latest Pixelmon, Exclusive Datapack, WARZONE Add-on, Fun Activities, Server Exclusive Costumes, Dungeons and MoreDon’t forget to follow our social media accounts and forums so you don’t miss this season full of exciting innovations. We look forward to collecting unique memories together in our new season! Are you ready? We are ready! We welcome you to this magical adventure. See you later!

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	93/800	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Legendary Items Repaired:	6	Gnome Villages Protected:	5
Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered:	6	World-Altering Spells Cast:	2
Demonic Pacts Formed:	1	Dragon Eggs Found:	8216
Ores Mined:	5633	Orbs of Power Found:	3
Haunted Redstone Contraptions Built:	6	Cuddly Creatures Pet:	46

Random Fact: Wholesome Lore: A hidden village was discovered where everyone bakes cookies—they give them out for free to travelers.

RealBox

Bedwars, Economy, Mini Games, PvP

BoxPvP server. Features: Powerful hosting, nearly best anti-cheat system possible, premium plugins

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	106/100	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.0 / 5
Legendary Scepters Created:	3	Unicorn Sightings:	1
Legendary Titles Earned:	1	Quantum Bards Serenaded:	2
Pirate Ships Raided:	2	Enchanted Teapots Collected:	10
Portal Loops Escaped:	3	Ancient Dragons Awakened:	0
Chaos Emeralds Discovered:	1	Phantom Horses Ridden:	2

Random Fact: Fun Fact: Teleportation mishaps are the leading cause of unexpected interdimensional friendships.

Minewind

Anarchy, Bedwars, Creative, Hardcore, KitPvP, Raiding, Survival Games

Choose your class and go on an epic adventure to gather all the OP loot that suits your play style!

A big variety of loot can be found in any chest in the world, or traded with many villagers for emeralds. More loot can be stolen from OP monsters, but they will use it against you first!

Special events happen on spawn every few hours that offer more unique OP rewards.

At the end of the day, explore the natural beauty of Minecraft wilderness and build a work of art in the perfect spot.

For more information visit https://minewind.com

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	92/500	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Magical Frogs Kissed:	3	Interstellar Fungi Gathered:	2
Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	4	Star Shards Collected:	160
Royal Courts Attended:	2	Dungeon Sieges Launched:	6
Phantom Ships Sailed:	2	Players Killed by Monsters:	1096
Sentient Weapons Trained:	2	Ghost Trains Ridden:	1

Random Fact: Surprising But True: The last rainstorm ended with a double rainbow and a pot of gold—it’s now a community treasure.

PocketPixels

Creative, Economy, MCMMO, Pixelmon, Roleplay, Survival, Vanilla

All our servers offer unique and enjoyable Pixelmon experiences, for all involved in the Pixelmon community, which you won’t feel anywhere else! Our aim is to provide you with a pixelmon experience like no other filled with our custom content, events, and a one of a kind friendly community. Join our servers, and begin your adventure of a lifetime!Put your skills and knowledge to the test by challenging our 8+ Gym System, run by experienced staff members, to earn all the badges! If you’re into the competitive scene or looking for another challenge, you can challenge our Hard-Mode Gyms, Elite Four and Battle Frontier. Try our daily quests where you complete challenges to earn a range of rewards and experience the Pixelmon gameplay to its fullest!You’ll constantly see new custom content and network updates, staff members actively improving your experience, giveaways and events with prizes, and much more!Everyone can find something to do on our servers! Fitting into your play style is easy, whether it be competitive battling, trading, catching Pixelmon, hunting down legendaries, or even hanging our with friends! You’ll find a place in the PocketPixels community.

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	104/900	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Goblin Armies Outwitted:	10	Dragon Eggs Found:	5138
Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	5	Warlock Amulets Crafted:	8
Endless Legions Commanded:	13	Arcane Towers Raised:	1
Chimeras Created:	2	Dragon Hoards Looted:	1
Goblin Markets Raided:	5	Reality Distortions Fixed:	1

Random Fact: Adorable Lore: A player found a secret door that leads to a world of stuffed animals—it’s a cuddly paradise.

VanillaPlus

Anarchy, Economy, Hardcore, PvP, Raiding, Survival, Vanilla

NO LAND CLAIMING | NO GRIEF PREVENTION | NO KEEP INVENTORY | PVP ENABLED | RAIDS We have a protected spawn that you can teleport to trades, meet up with people, or fight to the death against other players. You also can set homes and teleport so that you can easily get around without traveling far distances to get to farms, bases, or friends. On Vanilla Plus, you can experience classic Minecraft, but better! Build an epic base, fight to the death, or hang out. Anything is possible, so come check it out!

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	110/600	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Living Statues Befriended:	1	Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	1
Cursed Amulets Found:	1	Void Armor Forged:	13
Cosmic Hamsters Found:	5	Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured:	3
Haunted Mines Explored:	1	Astral Amulets Crafted:	26
Cursed Artifacts Recovered:	18	Forgotten Legends Remembered:	10

Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a rainbow that they could pick up and carry—now it’s the ultimate fashion accessory.

PlayCDU

FTB, PvE, PvP, Roleplay, Skyblock, Survival

Our Links: Website: https://www.craftdownunder.co Discord: https://discord.gg/playcdu Forums: https://forum.playcdu.co/About Us: To view all 35+ servers that we host and their IPs, head to https://forum.playcdu.co/servers/Craft Down Under is a gaming community that specializes in hosting and playing Minecraft modpacks. Our servers, located in Australia, Germany and the United States, offer a wide variety of modpacks to suit different playstyles and preferences. We’re dedicated to providing a welcoming environment for all players, regardless of their skill level, to come together and enjoy the unique experiences that modpacks provide. Join us today and see why Craft Down Under is the go-to destination for Minecraft modpack enthusiasts!

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	107/700	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Zombie Dances:	9	Cursed Amulets Found:	1
Glitched Entities Encountered:	1	Void Armor Forged:	30
Living Shadows Defeated:	2	Phantom Blocks Placed:	8
Titan Hearts Harvested:	5	Volcanoes Explored:	1
Underground Cities Explored:	4	Enchanted Forests Planted:	8

Random Fact: Did you know? The last phantom ship sighted was carrying a cargo of glow-in-the-dark kittens.

JackpotMC

Anarchy, Economy, Factions, LifeSteal, PvP, Raiding, Survival

JackpotMC is a server focused on PvP game modes, with our latest game mode being Lifesteal SMP. This is a one of kind, unique SMP that allows players to steal hearts from each other. Once a player kills another, they take a heart from them. If you die to a player, you lose a heart to them. Once you’re out of hearts, you’re banned for the rest of the day. With no claims and no rules on griefing, it is a pure Anarchy experience.

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	99/800	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Crystal Wands Charged:	9	Animals Bred:	29
Unbreakable Chains Forged:	7	Blood Moons Survived:	3
Magical Familiars Summoned:	5	Vanishing Items Found:	3
Zombie Dances:	9	Whimsical Tea Parties Held:	14
Talking Trees Consulted:	4	Frozen Fortresses Conquered:	2

Random Fact: Trivia: A cursed diamond was mined under a blood moon—since then, it’s been known to glow eerily in the dark.

NAVELYA

PvP

NAVELYA NETWORK Our server is a server played within the scope of PvP. If you have just started our server, use the (/kit) command. You Can Use It To Kill Other Players And Take Their Sets. You Can Enter Places in the PvP Area and Strengthen Your Set You can review our server. 1.16.5x 1.20.4

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	101/800	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Whispering Caves Entered:	2	Zombie Dances:	7
Arcane Towers Raised:	3	Infernal Machines Built:	1
Falling into the Void:	2	Endless Staircases Climbed:	3
Dragonfire Shields Forged:	2	Disappearing Landscapes Witnessed:	2
Titan Hearts Harvested:	4	Blood-Forged Axes Created:	11

Random Fact: Sweet But True: A player found a cuddly creature that hugs them every morning—it’s the best way to start the day.

CedarMC

Cross-Play, Earth, Economy, Factions, LifeSteal, Survival, Towny

The ZedarMC community is a very friendly one, and our staff is always available to help you. We are also a crossplay network, which means we support Bedrock Edition.ZedarMC has a variety of gamemodes ranging from peaceful to competitive, so you can always have fun and vibe! Survival SMP 1.13 – 1.20 Earth SMP 1.13 – 1.20 Lifesteal SMP 1.13 – 1.20 Oneblock 1.13 – 1.20 Skyblock 1.13 – 1.20 [Coming Soon]

Prison 1.13 – 1.20 [Coming Soon]IP: ms.zedarmc.com Bedrock Port: 19132 Discord: discord.gg/zedar

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	100/300	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Haunted Forests Traversed:	2	World-Altering Spells Cast:	0
Pirate Ships Captured:	3	Unique Catgirls Spotted:	3
Twisted Realms Survived:	3	Haunted Mines Explored:	3
Buildings Constructed:	6	Endless Mazes Solved:	1
Dungeon Sieges Launched:	5	Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	1

Random Fact: Cute But True: Someone built a house out of enchanted gingerbread—it’s sturdy, sweet, and smells like Christmas all year round.

EYServer

Cross-Play, LifeSteal, Pixelmon, Prison, Skyblock, Survival, Vanilla

The official Minecraft server for the YouTuber Eystreem who has over 7 million subscribers and 100 million monthly viewers! The server has a Survival SMP gamemode based on update 1.20 with grief protection and a Prison gamemode that contains custom pickaxe enchantments, pets, minions, prison cell islands, and more!Join IP: mcs.eyserver.com (Java and Bedrock)Claim FREE bundle on our store! https://store.eyserver.com

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	92/500	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Royal Courts Attended:	2	Storm Giants Negotiated With:	2
Dimension Hops:	8	Demonic Pacts Formed:	2
Forbidden Doors Opened:	3	Mysterious Portals Opened:	5
Lava Oceans Crossed:	3	Haunted Chests Opened:	1
Dungeon Sieges Launched:	5	Elemental Crystals Collected:	56

Random Fact: Legend has it that the last time someone opened a haunted chest, they found a singing teapot inside!

Foxcraft

Cross-Play, Economy, OneBlock, Parkour, PvP, Skyblock, Survival

Foxcraft is a Minecraft Server Network that has been around since 2011 and provides it’s playerbase with multiple classic gamemodes like Prison, Skyblock, Survival, Creative, and more! All of our gamemodes feature custom additions to keep things interesting and modern. We also provide custom gamemodes like Kingdoms (a custom take on the popular factions gamemode) and we like to run a wide variety of events.Our gamemodes: – Oneblock – Kingdoms – Skyblock – Prison – Creative – Survival – Parkour [NEW]Player Statistics: https://www.mcfoxcraft.com/stats/ IP: play.foxcraft.net Forums: www.mcfoxcraft.com Store: store.foxcraft.net

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	100/900	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	33	Sentient Weapons Trained:	2
Celestial Gardens Planted:	3	Herobrine Sightings:	0
Vanishing Structures Built:	5	Secret Guilds Joined:	1
Vampire Cloaks Sewn:	3	Endless Legions Commanded:	46
Eldritch Abominations Befriended:	2	Whimsical Tea Parties Held:	11

Random Fact: Magical Moment: The last tea party held in the enchanted forest had talking teacups—they love to chat about the weather.

Dreamerz Network

Anarchy, Economy, LifeSteal, Survival

Updated September 21, 2024

Players:	94/1000	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Doomsday Clocks Constructed:	2	Magical Moments Shared:	20
Sunfire Helmets Forged:	7	Enchanted Teapots Collected:	8
Reality Distortions Fixed:	1	Ores Mined:	3736
God-Killer Bows Constructed:	7	Unholy Beasts Tamed:	1
Cursed Diamonds Mined:	1	Potions Brewed:	56

Random Fact: Lovely Lore: A friendship bracelet once turned into a glowing beacon—now it lights the way for adventurers at night.