Minecraft SMP: Muh Guide to Not a Movie

Boomers, Cinema, commentary, criticism, Entertainment, film, funny, generation gap, Guide, humor, meme, Meme culture, millennial, Minecraft, Movie, muh, Parody, satire, shit movie, smp, social media, trending, viral

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers where all you do is mine and build? Well, do we have the server for you! Join our wacky and wild Minecraft SMP where the only rule is to have fun (and maybe don’t grief too much, but who’s counting?).

We’ve got flying pigs, talking sheep, and a secret underground disco party that only the coolest players know about. Rumor has it that if you find the mystical diamond chicken, you’ll be granted three wishes by the Minecraft gods themselves.

But beware, there’s a notorious group of llamas who call themselves the Llama Mafia, and they’ll stop at nothing to steal your diamonds and llama-nap your pets. Can you outsmart them and become the ultimate llama whisperer?

So what are you waiting for? Join our insane Minecraft SMP today and prepare for a wild ride like no other. Just remember, it’s not a movie, it’s a guide… to the craziest Minecraft adventure of your life!

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	95/700	Uptime:	99%
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	2	Reality Warps Survived:	2
Magical Ponies Rescued:	5	Elemental Temples Cleansed:	2

Random Fact: Whimsical Lore: A player once befriended a cloud that now follows them around, raining only when they need a cool down.

United Lands

Economy, PvE, PvP, Roleplay, Survival, Towny

United Lands is a Towny-based Earth SMP that integrates peace, war, economies and events thanks to our unique mechanics. We are a friendly server with an active Discord and community as well as a helpful staff team. Our Earth map is on a 1:500 scale that goes alongside a Resource world, Nether and End. These last three worlds reset at the end of each month. Settle a town with your friends or brave it alone with Towny – develop your lands into thriving nations and empires that span the globe. In addition to this, we often hold events on our Discord and on the Minecraft server itself which are always looked forward to by our players. Discord events can contain games nights and watch-alongs, whereas our in game events can include skin contests, minigame events or server-wide mechanic changes in limited time events. You can progress in-game to a powerful position with our in game perks menu where you can buy additional abilities and privileges with the money earned from our balanced jobs, trade, and war system. Strictly cosmetic donator perks are also available on our website to those who want to show off a bit more. The server is constantly changing and updating for the better with changelogs coming out almost weekly containing new fixes and plugins. Custom items like you’ve never seen them before! Food, tools, and blocks that offer completely new gameplay experiences beyond just more options on what to eat are here. Grow new custom trees that have their own unique mechanics and drops or brew amazing alcohols using them. You can even change the biome you’re standing in with our new tools! Take a look at our handcrafted website that provides incredible insight into the server with pages dedicated to towns and players with real time map locations! Our server is not limited to Java players only, with our new parity update Bedrock players can join in on the fun too! Look at our website under the “Bedrock Joining” article on the info tab to learn how to connect. IP: mc.unitedlands.org Bedrock Port: 19132 Website: unitedlands.org Discord: discord.gg/unitedlands Map: unitedlands.org/maps

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	99/300	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Ghost Trains Ridden:	0	Forbidden Grimoires Read:	6
Glorious Feasts Held:	19	Goblin Armies Outwitted:	6

Random Fact: Did you hear? A player once rode a unicorn straight into a dimension hop, and they haven’t stopped laughing since.

BrokenThrone

Bedwars, Cross-Play, MCMMO, OneBlock, PvE, PvP, Survival

Welcome to BrokenThrone, the ultimate Minecraft server experience! We’re thrilled to have you here!IP Address: Java: play.brokenthrone.xyz Bedrock: play.brokenthrone.xyzServer Features: • Cracked • Player-driven economy with player shops and auctions • Grief protection to ensure your builds are safe • RPG-style leveling and skills • Custom Enchants • ETC

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	94/200	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Magical Ponies Rescued:	5	Backwards Speech Heard:	5
Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	2	Elemental Temples Cleansed:	4

Random Fact: Wholesome Truth: A player discovered a hidden cave full of glowing crystals—it’s now a popular spot for quiet reflection and wonder.

Melon Cloud

Economy, MCMMO, PvP, Survival

Playing Melon Cloud you can forget about pay to win here, everyone’s got a fair shot at fun. We spice things up with free custom monthly textures that’ll give your gameplay a fresh twist without breaking the bank.Enjoy the freedom of soaring through the skies with the /fly command – because who doesn’t love a little virtual airtime? But what really makes Melon Cloud a blast is our awesome community. Whether you’re a Minecraft veteran or a total newbie, our players are all about making you feel right at home.

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	105/500	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Forbidden Tomes Read:	3	Hidden Passages Discovered:	8
Magical Beanstalks Grown:	4	Dragons Tamed:	4

Random Fact: Wild But True: Someone actually summoned an Eldritch Beast using nothing but friendship bracelets!

Mantic Network

Economy, Mini Games, Parkour, PvE, PvP, Survival, Vanilla

We are a fast growing, friendly and fun Minecraft server community. Mantic server was originally founded back in 2015.Come give it a try at mso.mantic.gg

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	107/700	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Forbidden Relics Collected:	1	Eldritch Medallions Worn:	13
Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	4	Legendary Scepters Created:	6

Random Fact: Heartwarming Fact: A player once found a cozy campfire that tells bedtime stories—perfect for winding down after a day of quests.

Ruby

Economy, MCMMO, Parkour, PvP, Survival, Towny

Welcome to Ruby! We are an online community with an extra focus on togetherness, inclusion and friendship. Here you can meet safely no matter who you are. We want everyone to experience development and mastery at Rubinen. We have Survival, Creative, Dungeons, Parkour, Spleef, Towny, Events, KeepInventory, Voteparty, Competitions, PvP and more!

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	107/1000	Uptime:	99%
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Wilderness Tamed:	13	Cursed Statues Activated:	1
Heroic Oaths Sworn:	9	Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted:	2

Random Fact: Did you know? The last phantom ship sighted was carrying a cargo of glow-in-the-dark kittens.

DraconityMC

Cross-Play, Economy, PvE, PvP, Survival

Cross-Play! Anyone can join from any launcher!!DraconityMC – SURVIVAL KINGDOMS– Custom Mobs: Fully customized passive and hostile mobs, as well as interactive pets with skills and abilities! – Custom World Generation: Completely reworked world generation, featuring hundreds of varieties of biomes filled with custom mobs! – Outposts: Fight for rulership of the four biome outposts, but fight off the ogres, vikings, ents, and bandits! – Boss Fights: Daily varieties of custom textured boss spawns with OP rewards! – Skills: Redesigned custom McMMO skills, RPG style! Level up for rewards! – Battlepass: Featuring hundreds of fresh quests to face every season, with a balanced VIP battlepass access! – New Enchantments: Completely reworked enchantment system, featuring a wizard NPC for all your enchantment needs! – Kingdoms: Build and form the strongest kingdom on the server, and declare war on other kingdoms for power! If you just wanna chill and build, you can turn this feature off and sit back and watch the chaos! – Gems Shop: Buy keys, cosmetics, wardrobe items, and much more with gems! – Dungeons: Grind through the levels of the dungeons for unique rewards and challenging battles from our custom mobs and bosses! + much more!: We have so many amazing features that we can’t even list them all, so come check it out now!

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	92/100	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Magical Familiars Summoned:	1	Lunar Scepters Activated:	3
Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	1	Mines Excavated:	1583

Random Fact: Legendary Lore: Every time an ancient relic is unearthed, a lost city somewhere trembles in fear.

GuildCraft Network

Creative, Economy, Prison, PvP, Skyblock, Survival

Welcome to GuildCraft network!We offer many different games with our custom made plugins, maps, and games.

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	109/900	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Warlock Amulets Crafted:	11	Cosmic Entities Communed With:	0
Dimension-Hopping Bunnies Found:	5	Cursed Statues Activated:	4

Random Fact: Cute But True: Someone built a house out of enchanted gingerbread—it’s sturdy, sweet, and smells like Christmas all year round.

NostalgiaCraft

Economy, PvE, Survival, Vanilla

NostalgiaCraft – Where Community and Creativity Unite! (Bedrock & Java Crossplay)Build, Create, Thrive: Collaborate within our community to craft awe-inspiring structures in a 100K world border. Apply for spawn access to showcase your skills!Claim Your Domain: Vanilla gameplay made convenient with commands like /spawn and /sethome. Focus on adventure and creation.Adventure Awaits: Engage in wild PvP and daring thievery. Forge alliances, conquer challenges, and uncover the unknown.Enhanced Features: Enjoy the little things—sit on stairs for a cozy touch, toggle phantoms for restful nights, and experience fast leaf decay. Say goodbye to pesky creeper holes.Thriving Economy: Dive into an item-based economy with an active trading system. Utilize /trade to exchange resources and thrive in a player-driven marketplace. Active Staff, Quick Support: Our dedicated team ensures your experience is exceptional. Get help through discord tickets.Visit Our Wiki: https://nostalgiacraft.fun/wiki Join Our Discord: https://discord.gg/rmNcuGX

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	94/700	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Volcanoes Explored:	2	Endless Mazes Conquered:	3
Astral Projections Made:	2	Zombie Dances:	1

Random Fact: Legendary Tale: A phantom knight once handed over a magical scroll in exchange for a cup of tea—how polite!

ArcherMC

Creative, Economy, Factions, KitPvP, Parkour, Prison, PvP

Number 1 OP server with tons of unique features: plots, gangs, drugs, explosive items, cheapest donor ranks, custom mines, and the ultimate experience! We have rankups from A-Z as well as 26 custom built amazing mines to fit them! All players can have their own plots and gangs! What are you waiting for?! Join now!

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	92/600	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Villages Defended:	17	Secret Guilds Joined:	2
Unholy Beasts Tamed:	2	Wailing Winds Heard:	1

Random Fact: Mythical Moment: A single drop of lava from the Phoenix Feather’s nest can forge an indestructible sword.

SpongeCraft

Economy, Survival, Towny

Custom Enchants, Multi SlimeFun Addons, in-game ranks, and more!ABOUT US:A new server, with a community rooted from over 6 years back, SpongeCraft is a close knit and active group of people that offers an experience like no other! We welcomes people of all ages, backgrounds, and interests, so you’re sure to meet many new friends. SpongeCraft is a friendly, mature SMP type server with many unique perks you’ll love and enjoy with a large focus on the community!

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	95/200	Uptime:	100%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Dragon Eggs Hatched:	2	Celestial Blades Sharpened:	9
Epic Shields Constructed:	25	Whispering Shadows Heard:	3

Random Fact: Did you know? When a reality-bending puzzle is solved, it sometimes turns nearby players into walking marshmallows.

Nest GSG

Economy, MCMMO, PvE, PvP, Survival, Vanilla

The GSG Network is in an incredible phase!! Forget everything you’ve heard about the network in the past and come give your future favorite server a try.Currently, the Águia Server – 1.20+ is active The server is cross-platform – Java and Bedrock Survival mode with 3 different worlds to choose from Exclusive perks available in each world Box system with new arrivals per season Tournament System Ground Protection System VIP system mcMMO skills Clan System with War Event

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	94/800	Uptime:	96%
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Ghost Trains Ridden:	0	Zombie Dances:	5
Sunfire Helmets Forged:	7	Whispering Caves Entered:	7

Random Fact: Truth or Myth: Ender Dragon reincarnations sometimes come back as friendly puppies—seriously!

KoalaServers

Creative, Cross-Play, MCMMO, PvP, Survival, Vanilla

Welcome, our aim is for a close to vanilla taste, but with the added flavor of jobs, economy, player ran shops, and warps. We are generous with claim blocks too as we feel it’s fair to allow players to protect their bases no matter how big the project! Come join our chill community and enjoy some unique Aussie ranks!

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	97/400	Uptime:	97%
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Enchanted Forests Planted:	12	Cuddly Creatures Pet:	30
Cosmic Entities Communed With:	1	Haunted Chests Opened:	7

Random Fact: Wholesome Lore: A hidden village was discovered where everyone bakes cookies—they give them out for free to travelers.

AstraMC

Cross-Play, Economy, Parkour, PvE, Survival, Vanilla

– Cute pets that will follow you around, you can ride and have skill trees! – We have a premium land claiming plugin with extreme customization for better protection – We have tag’s to show off some style and some new cosmetics in the works as well~ – Farming and player based economy! Farm to become the richest on the server or make a shop and join the kings of the economy – Skill’s for those that like a little bit of a rpg twist on their favorite game~ – New collectible’s each month, if you get lucky you can sell them for millions later – Amazing events hosted throughout the year for all to participate in! – Active staff members, owners and mangement as well as active socials and one or two small content creators! – Currently in the works of working on turning into a server network with multiple gamemodes and something for everyone to enjoy~

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	98/300	Uptime:	99%
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Epic Weapons Forged:	10	Vanishing Structures Built:	4
Mimic Chests Discovered:	4	Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	1

Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a wishing well that actually grants wishes—it’s now surrounded by flowers and good vibes.

Phloxnew

Cross-Play, Economy, Survival

Phlox is a newly opened no-grief Survival server that offers many custom-made features to make your playing experience better. Play alone or create a guild with your friends! We have a chill and welcoming community, and we hope to see you soon!You can also vote for us to rank up in-game!Bedrock IP: play.phloxmc.net:19132

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	103/700	Uptime:	98%
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Meteorites Collected:	3	Teleportation Mishaps:	2
Legendary Armor Sets Assembled:	46	Titan Hearts Harvested:	3

Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a rainbow that they could pick up and carry—now it’s the ultimate fashion accessory.

Mythical Empires Server

MCMMO, PvE, PvP, Roleplay, Survival

-= Mythical Empires =- – Money and Tokens – Kingdoms – Jobs – Skills – Dungeons – Pets – Amazing Enchants – Boosters – Auctions – Events – Discord Support – Active staff – Friendly community

Updated October 23, 2024

Players:	91/400	Uptime:	95%
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	1	Potions Brewed:	168
Falling into the Void:	1	Villages Defended:	19

Random Fact: Trivia: A cursed diamond was mined under a blood moon—since then, it’s been known to glow eerily in the dark.