Forget about your shaky hands and wheelchair woes, because on our server, you’ll be running, jumping, and crafting to your heart’s content. Who needs to knit when you can build an entire empire out of blocks?
And don’t worry about feeling lonely, because our server is filled with friendly players who are always up for a good time. Who knows, you might even find a new BFF or two (just make sure they’re not eyeing your husband like your cousin Lily).
So come on down to our server and leave all your troubles behind. Who knows, you might even forget about that whole “better off dead” comment you made to your husband. Just remember, in Minecraft, the only thing you’ll be killing is creepers.