Retardproof Minecraft Servers | New Minecraft Servers 2025

YOLOcraft: One Life Only

assbugersthis, autistic, awkward, born BROWN, dumb thug, extroverted, Life, one chance at life, whiteys, worst fate, yolocraft

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Players:	94/600	Votes:	5764
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Time-Traveling Monkeys Met:	1	Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	1
Wizards Turned into Frogs:	0	Endless Mazes Conquered:	3
Divine Spears Created:	25	Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	2
Crops Grown:	6737	Enchanted Teapots Collected:	17
Dark Rituals Completed:	7	Friendship Bracelets Exchanged:	22
Titan Hearts Harvested:	5	Lunar Scepters Activated:	3
Magical Familiars Summoned:	4	Shadow Wolves Tamed:	2

Welcome to our Minecraft server where you only get one chance at life! But don’t worry, we’ve got some wild perks to make up for it. Picture this: you spawn in as a character born BROWN with assbugersthis. Yep, you read that right. But hey, at least you’re not stuck with the boring old whiteys, right? Those guys are expected to be awkward and autistic, but us browns? We’re expected to be extroverted dumb thugs.

Join our server for a chance to embrace your inner thug and show off your unique brown swagger. Who needs normal when you can stand out from the crowd with our one-of-a-kind character traits? Plus, you never know what kind of crazy adventures await you in our Minecraft world. So why wait? Join now and let your brown flag fly high!

IllumiCraft: Where Even Moms Can Join!

Benefits, Business, cash donation, Connections, elite empire, Fame, IllumiCraft, illuminati, INITIATION, Join, knowledge, loyalty, membership process., moms, new world order, organization, political race, Powers, Protection, recruitment scheme, Riches, SECURITY, Top

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Players:	96/700	Votes:	9068
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Dragons Adopted as Pets:	3	Duplicated Mobs Battled:	2
Shadow Realms Conquered:	0	Dimension Hops:	13
Mines Excavated:	3273	Chimeras Created:	3
Cosmic Hamsters Found:	1	Whispering Caves Entered:	5
Lunar Scepters Activated:	10	Inverted Worlds Discovered:	2
Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	2	Mystic Runes Engraved:	5
Ancient Guardians Awoken:	3	Demon Skulls Collected:	25

Welcome to the Most Epic Minecraft Server Ever!

Are you tired of being a noob in Minecraft? Do you want to rise to the top and become a Minecraft legend? Well, look no further because our server is here to make all your dreams come true!

Join our server and become a part of the Illuminati World Elite Empire! Yes, you heard that right – the Illuminati! We will bring you fame, riches, powers, and security like you’ve never seen before. You’ll be recognized in your business, political race, and every aspect of your life. And guess what? You’ll be protected spiritually and physically! How cool is that?

Once you join the Illuminati Empire, you’ll receive knowledge, protection, and connections that will blow your mind. Oh, and did we mention the instant $540,000.00 USD cash donation benefit? Cha-ching!

But wait, there’s more! This offer is only available for a limited time, so you better act fast. We don’t tolerate disloyalty, so if you’re not serious about joining the Illuminati, then don’t even bother contacting us. We only want the most unique and dedicated players on our server.

So, do you have what it takes to be a member of the Illuminati New World Order? If the answer is YES, then get ready for the adventure of a lifetime! Contact us now for more instructions on how to join our exclusive club.

Best Regard, The Illuminati Temple – Minecraft Edition

World War Mine: Where history meets hilarity!

alliances, Armistice, CASUALTIES, centenary, global conflict, global impact, Hilarity, historical events, historical significance, History, imperialism, meets, Military, nationalism, peace treaty, Propaganda, Remembrance, trench warfare, Veterans, War, War History, world, world war one

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Players:	104/700	Votes:	2019
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Phantom Ships Sailed:	3	Holy Grails Found:	5
Starry Nights Enjoyed:	33	Darkness Engulfments Escaped:	4
Legendary Titles Earned:	1	Farms Harvested:	514
Lost Cities Unearthed:	1	Endless Mazes Conquered:	3
Whispering Caves Entered:	4	Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered:	2
Horror Stories Survived:	4	Hedge Mazes Navigated:	9
Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	5	Spectral Entities Defeated:	2

Welcome to our Minecraft server where we recreate World War One in the most epic and hilarious way possible! Join us for intense battles, crazy alliances, and of course, plenty of explosions.

Imagine charging into battle with a carrot as your weapon, riding a pig into enemy territory, or building a fortress out of diamond blocks to protect yourself from enemy fire.

Our community is filled with players who are just as crazy and fun-loving as you, so you’ll never be bored. Plus, we have regular events like zombie apocalypse survival challenges and treasure hunts that will keep you on your toes.

So what are you waiting for? Join us now and experience the most insane version of World War One you’ve ever seen!

Respawned Too Soon

Backlash, criticism, Decline, Die, Disappointment, fanbase, Fast, flavour of the month, fnaf, Franchise, Gaming, Horror, hype, Lame, Nostalgia, opinion, Overrated, Popular, Respawned, trend, video games

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Players:	90/800	Votes:	2015
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Unique Catgirls Spotted:	7	Omnipotent Charms Created:	3
Mythical Relics Collected:	12	Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered:	3
Lunar Scepters Activated:	5	Nether Portals Gone Wrong:	4
Gorgon Shields Crafted:	2	Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	2
Quantum Bards Serenaded:	1	Vanishing Structures Built:	1
Star Shards Collected:	133	Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	4
Players Killed by Monsters:	4817	Cursed Villages Purged:	2

Welcome to our epic Minecraft server where the only thing scarier than a Creeper is a jump scare from a Five Nights at Freddy’s character! Join us if you’re tired of the same old boring servers and want to experience the thrill of surviving in a world where animatronics come to life and hunt you down.

Our server is so lit that even Herobrine himself is scared to log on. We’ve got custom plugins that will blow your mind, like a Freddy Fazbear boss battle and a haunted pizzeria where you can test your survival skills against the scariest animatronics around.

So why did that other server die so fast? Maybe it was just a flavour of the month and couldn’t handle the awesomeness of our server. Or maybe FNAF is just lame now and everyone is flocking to our server for a fresh and exciting gaming experience.

Don’t be a noob, join our server today and see what all the hype is about. Who knows, you might even survive the night!

Lost in Minecraft, Send Help!

accident, Community, DELETED, drink, Friends, funny, Help, humor, internet, Lost, meme, Minecraft, Pepe, rare, rare Pepe, sad, Send, Shoes, Support, thank you, tuxedo, viral

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Players:	104/800	Votes:	9841
Rating:	4.6 / 5
God-Tier Weapons Forged:	24	Friendship Bracelets Exchanged:	44
Cuddly Creatures Pet:	24	Undead Armies Raised:	1
Emeralds Found:	2828	Alien Abductions:	3
Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered:	6	Spells Gone Horribly Wrong:	10
Magic Scrolls Discovered:	5	Crystal Caves Mapped:	3
Epic Mounts Acquired:	7	Players Killed by Monsters:	4689
Secret Libraries Discovered:	1	Duplicated Mobs Battled:	1

Welcome to our wild and wacky Minecraft server where the craziest things happen!

Have you ever accidentally deleted a Pepe with a tuxedo who was sipping on a drink and showing off his stylish shoes? Well, fear not because on our server, you’ll find plenty of frens in tuxedos ready to party with you!

Join us for epic adventures, hilarious shenanigans, and a whole lot of fun. Who needs a boring old Pepe when you can have a whole gang of tuxedo-wearing frens by your side?

So what are you waiting for? Come join the madness and let’s make some unforgettable memories together. See you on the server, fren!

CraftyCutie’s Pixel Playground

beauty, Confidence, CraftyCuties, cute, deserving, deserving admiration, deserving attention, deserving happiness, deserving kindness, deserving love, deserving recognition, deserving respect, deserving success, deserving validation, empowerment, nice girl, photogenic, PIXEL, Playground, positivity, self esteem, self love, self worth

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Players:	94/400	Votes:	9072
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Cursed Scrolls Read:	3	Endless Legions Commanded:	19
Ether Blades Crafted:	12	Hidden Passages Discovered:	4
Buildings Constructed:	41	Haunted Chests Opened:	4
Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	12	Mimic Chests Discovered:	1
Chimeras Created:	3	Twisted Realms Survived:	1
Magical Familiars Summoned:	1	Undead Armies Raised:	1
Doomsday Clocks Constructed:	2	Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	1

Welcome to our EPIC Minecraft server where looking cute and being photogenic is a MUST!

Join us and experience a world where every block is perfectly angled for the best selfie lighting. Our server is equipped with GLAMOROUS skins and outfits to make sure you always look on point.

But that’s not all! Our server is also home to the legendary Pink Sheep who will grant you three wishes if you can find them. Rumor has it, one wish is for unlimited diamonds, another wish is for a pet dragon, and the third wish is for a lifetime supply of pizza.

So what are you waiting for? Join us and let’s make Minecraft FABULOUS!

KagurabachiCraft: Where Creepers Dance and Endermen Party

Axed, CREEPERS, Dance, endermen, Good, Good manga, jump, Jump manga, Jump manga reading, Kagurabachi, Kagurabachi manga, KagurabachiCraft, Manga, manga axed, manga axed good, manga axed Jump, manga axed reading, manga good, manga Jump, Manga Reading, Party, reading, stop reading, stop reading manga

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Players:	107/1000	Votes:	7497
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Cursed Statues Activated:	1	Dragon Eggs Hatched:	1
Living Statues Befriended:	3	Infinity Stones Found:	5
Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	4	Time-Traveling Monkeys Met:	1
Epic Mounts Acquired:	2	Cursed Biomes Uncovered:	6
Epic Battles Fought:	5	Magic Wands Crafted:	10
God-Killer Bows Constructed:	10	Pirate Ships Raided:	3
Ores Mined:	2038	Meteorite Armor Created:	28

Welcome to our Minecraft server, where if you don’t join, you might as well stop playing Minecraft altogether! This server is so EPIC that if you don’t join, you’ll miss out on all the crazy adventures and shenanigans that happen here.

Picture this: you’re mining for diamonds and suddenly a group of llamas start attacking you because they think you stole their precious emeralds. Or how about the time when a creeper decided to start a dance party in the middle of town square? Only on our server, folks!

Don’t miss out on the chance to join the most INSANE Minecraft server out there. Trust us, if this server was a manga, it would never get axed because it’s just too good!

SleepyCraft: 5 AM Edition

5.., alarm clock, bedtime routine, early morning, Edition, go to sleep, Help, insomnia, Posed, sleep aid, sleep deprivation, sleep disorders, sleep habits, sleep hygiene, sleep problems, sleep schedule, sleep solutions, sleep therapy, sleep tips, SleepyCraft, tired, Wake Up

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Players:	105/700	Votes:	809
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Dimensional Rifts Closed:	3	Divine Spears Created:	11
Celestial Beings Befriended:	0	Arcane Towers Raised:	5
Zombie Dances:	10	Haunted Chests Opened:	4
Gryphons Tamed:	3	Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	0
Unsolvable Puzzles Solved:	4	Magic Scrolls Discovered:	7
Spells Gone Horribly Wrong:	8	Evil Lairs Raided:	7
Epic Shields Constructed:	31	Legendary Heroes Trained:	3

Are you tired of being forced to wake up at 5 AM every day? Well, join our Minecraft server and escape the tyranny of early mornings! On our server, you can stay up all night building your dream world without any annoying alarms disrupting your beauty sleep.

But that’s not all! Our server is also home to a secret underground society of llama warriors who are plotting to take over the Minecraft universe. Will you join them in their quest for domination, or will you stand against them and protect the innocent villagers?

And if that’s not enough to entice you, rumor has it that there’s a hidden treasure chest filled with diamonds, emeralds, and enchanted golden apples waiting to be discovered somewhere in the depths of our server. Will you be the lucky player to find it and become the richest miner in all of Minecraft?

So what are you waiting for? Join our Minecraft server today and experience a world like no other, where the possibilities are endless and the adventures are always epic. Just be sure to set your alarm for 5 AM so you don’t miss out on all the fun!

Crafty Americans: 6% Think They Can Beat Minecraft

Adrenaline, AMERICANS, Animals, battle, beat, challenge, Competition, Confidence, Crafty, danger, fear, Fight, grizzly bear, Minecraft, Nature, predator, prey, statistics, strength, survey, Survival, Wilderness, wildlife

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Players:	97/500	Votes:	341
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Ancient Dragons Awakened:	2	Warlock Amulets Crafted:	15
Legendary Armor Sets Assembled:	41	Chaos Emeralds Discovered:	1
Horror Stories Survived:	5	Haunted Forests Traversed:	5
Celestial Events Witnessed:	5	Demon Skulls Collected:	12
Spells Gone Horribly Wrong:	2	God-Tier Weapons Forged:	13
Treasure Maps Found:	7	Evil Lairs Raided:	6
Meteor Showers Witnessed:	3	Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	11

Are you part of that 6% of Americans who think they can take on a Grizzly bear and win? Well, we’ve got the perfect Minecraft server for you! Join us for the ultimate showdown where you can prove your strength against Grizzly bears in epic battles.

But that’s not all! Our server is also home to a secret underground lava parkour course where you can test your agility and speed. Rumor has it that only the bravest players have made it to the end without getting burned to a crisp.

And if you’re feeling extra daring, take on our Ender Dragon challenge where you must defeat the mighty beast using only a wooden sword and a stack of rotten flesh. It’s not for the faint of heart, but the rewards are legendary.

So what are you waiting for? Join our server now and show the world that you’re not afraid to take on the impossible. Just remember, it’s all in good fun and no actual Grizzly bears were harmed in the making of this server.

MoneyBegCraft: Join Nijisanji for LOLs

Anime, beg for money, collaboration, Content Creator, Donations, Entertainment, fanbase, Gaming, Interactive, Join, join Nijisanji, Live streaming, lols, MoneyBegCraft, Music, Nijisanji, Online Community, SUPERCHAT, Support, talent agency, Virtual idol, Virtual talent agency, virtual youtuber, Vtuber

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Players:	91/900	Votes:	7353
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Dimension Hops:	4	Votes:	5309
Portal Loops Escaped:	1	Animals Bred:	75
Forbidden Relics Collected:	7	Godly Talismans Bestowed:	10
Doomsday Clocks Constructed:	2	Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	18
Epic Weapons Forged:	3	Potions Brewed:	30
Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered:	1	Pirate Ships Captured:	1
Phantom Knights Defeated:	7	Dragon Hoards Looted:	2

Welcome to the most EPIC Minecraft server you will ever encounter! Why should you join, you ask? Well, let me tell you some INSANE reasons:

1. Our server is filled with UNICORNS that shoot RAINBOWS out of their horns. Who wouldn’t want to see that?!

2. We have a secret underground DISCO where you can dance the night away with all your virtual friends.

3. If you join our server, you automatically become a MILLIONAIRE in Minecraft coins. Yes, you heard that right. No need to beg for money here!

4. Our server is protected by a MAGIC forcefield that keeps out all creepers, zombies, and other pesky mobs. Your builds will be safe and sound!

So what are you waiting for? Join our server now and experience the craziest Minecraft adventure of your life! Trust us, you won’t regret it. 😉