Criminals. MC Servers – New Minecraft Servers

ESMC Life RP – Riverside Valley

Police, Roleplay, Vigilantes, CAR, Helicopter
Welcome to ESMC Life Roleplay!

Riverside Valley is where the action’s at: criminals, rich folks, and heroes all collide in a world of excitement. Want a fancy ride to your high-rise penthouse? Grab a car, plane, or helicopter and live the high life, all while dodging the cops chasing bank robbers.

Server Information:
How to Join:
Join ESMC Life Roleplay today for the latest updates and game modes! Let the adventures begin! 🚗🚁💰
Play.es-mc.net
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Criminal Faith in Minecraft World

conscience in crime, guilt and redemption, violence and morality, spirituality and violence, world

JOIN NOW: The SERVER OF YOUR WILDEST PARANOIAS – OR PERISH IN THE ENDLESS VOID!

Welcome, noble mortals, to a Minecraft realm where nothing is as it seems and everything is a slippery illusion painted by the hands of hyperdimensional squids! Is this the greatest server ever, or the bleakest void of despair? The answer is wrapped in a riddle, located in the third block to the left of your deepest fears! Join us, or become a taco in a cat’s dream!

Unstable Features of Our Absolutely Sane Server

Feature	Explanation
Invisible Blocks	Try to mine! But wait, did you just unearth your childhood trauma? Wizardry or tragedy? Who can say!
Endless Mob Spawning	Every monster you kill will bring 3 new neighbors that only want to discuss taxes. Do you understand the paradox?
Sky is Actually Floor	Yes, that’s right! Jump to feel the ground tickle your eyes. Gravity is a social construct.
CheeseCrafting	Craft your dreams with aged cheddar! Losing sanity has never been tastier.
Zombie Consciousness	Every slain zombie gives you a percentage of their doubt! Build your empire on the ashes of their confusion.
Random Spaghetti Blocks	Every time you build a house, there’s a 67% chance it turns into a bowl of spaghetti. What are you hungry for?

Frequently Asked Questions… Or Are They?

Q: Can I join if I don’t have a Minecraft account? A: Absolutely, if you are brave enough to accept the void’s invitation! Deny the reality, embrace the darkness.

Q: What is the goal of this server? A: Goals are mere illusions! But if you collect 20 goldfish, while blindfolded, perhaps enlightenment will grace you like a hummingbird wearing a tuxedo.

Q: Is there a safe place to spawn? A: Safety is an illusion crafted by delusional sheep in a capitalist utopia! Your safest spawn point is wherever you feel the least comfortable.

Random Reviews from the Multiverse

“How can you be a violent mafioso or narco who regularly murders innocent people and still honestly say you’re Catholic?” “Only salad with a side of existential dread will save us now!” “The Endermen are whispering and I can’t find my left shoe!”

Mystic Realms 1.20.6

thousands of years ago, Criminals., Realms, lower quality, spiritually dead

Join our Minecraft server and unleash your low inhib energy! Who needs attractiveness when you can be unattractive and still have a blast? We welcome all types, even criminals and abusers (in the game, of course). Channel your inner Taoist and experience spiritual awakening through block-building madness! Don’t be spiritually dead, join us now!

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Piano Love Thread 1.21.1

Criminals., donation, relationship, anxious, love

Yo, listen up fam, I found this lit Minecraft server that’s like finding the one, but in blocky form. Forget about 3D babes, we got Pan Piano, the queen of piano playing in anime cosplay. She’s like a virtual waifu, elegant, classy, and dedicated to her art. And get this, she acknowledges your presence with HEARTS and replies to your comments. It’s like a virtual relationship, bro!

I’ve been donating like crazy, dropping 7K on her because she’s worth it. She knows I appreciate Japanese culture, and I feel a connection every time she uploads a new video. I’m thinking of dropping another 3K to seal the deal and maybe she’ll finally show me her face as a reward. It’s like a love story, but in Minecraft form.

So, join this server and experience the virtual love story of a lifetime. Who needs a real girlfriend when you have Pan Piano in Minecraft? It’s like finding true love in the virtual world, bro! #MinecraftLoveStory #PanPianoWaifu

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&g t;Even Homeless Criminals Can Get A GF Minecraft SMP

Humanity, stigma, relationships, Understanding, DATING

🤣 Join our wacky Minecraft SMP where even homeless criminals can find love! That’s right, if you’re still single in the game, what’s your excuse? Our server is filled with so much romance and drama, you’ll feel like you’re in a virtual soap opera. Who knows, you might even find your soulmate while building your dream castle or fighting off creepers. So come join us and see if you can find love in the most unexpected places! 💕🏰💥 #HomelessCriminalsNeedLoveToo #MinecraftRomance #SoulmateSearch

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Minecraft SMP: Police Surveillance Scene

undercover operation, surveillance scene, Police investigation, smp, Police

Welcome to the most chaotic and hilarious Minecraft SMP you’ll ever experience! Join us on this server where the police are surveilling criminals with binoculars, but instead of catching them, they break out into a synchronized dance routine to “Every Breath You Take” by The Police. It’s like a real-life musical, but in Minecraft!

But that’s not all, we have insane stories happening all the time on this server. Like the time a player built a rollercoaster that accidentally launched them into the sky and they landed in a pool of lava. Or when a group of players decided to have a fashion show using only pixelated blocks as clothing. The creativity knows no bounds here!

So if you’re looking for a wild and wacky Minecraft experience, join us on this server and be prepared for non-stop laughs and unforgettable moments. Just remember, every step you take, we’ll be watching you…and probably laughing our heads off!

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Heist Masters Minecraft Server

Job, thieves, TEAM, scheme, Caper

Hey there, fellow Minecrafters! Are you ready for the heist of a lifetime? Our server is the perfect place to assemble your dream team and pull off the ultimate robbery in the virtual world.

Picture this: we’ve got hidden treasure chests filled with diamonds, emeralds, and rare loot just waiting to be plundered. But beware, the server is guarded by a fierce dragon who will stop at nothing to protect its precious hoard.

Join us and embark on a thrilling adventure filled with danger, excitement, and plenty of laughs along the way. Who knows, you might just walk away with enough riches to make even the most seasoned pirate jealous. So what are you waiting for? Grab your pickaxe, gather your crew, and let’s make history on the high seas of Minecraft!

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Party Time Minecraft Server

Vengeance, satisfaction, rapists, death penalty, society

Welcome to our Minecraft server, where we celebrate the demise of evil-doers in the most epic way possible! Join us for our annual “Dead Rapist Day” celebration, where we gather around a virtual bonfire and roast marshmallows while sharing stories of justice served.

But that’s not all – our server is also home to the infamous “Zombie Pigman Disco Party,” where undead pigmen bust out their best dance moves to the beat of Minecraft music discs. You haven’t lived until you’ve seen a zombie pigman do the Macarena!

And if you’re feeling adventurous, join our exclusive “Lava Parkour Challenge,” where players must navigate a treacherous course of lava pits and fiery obstacles to reach the ultimate prize – a diamond-encrusted golden sword that shoots fireworks!

So come on down to our server and join in the madness – because where else can you celebrate dead rapists and dance with zombie pigmen all in one place?

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Subantarctic Criminal Deportation Minecraft Server

subantarctic islands, law enforcement, law and order, punishment, criminal justice

Are you tired of dealing with pesky criminals in your Minecraft world? Well, have we got the solution for you! Join our server and help us deport all our criminals to the subantarctic islands! Not only will you be doing a public service, but you’ll also get to witness some epic battles between the criminals and the penguins. Plus, who wouldn’t want to see a creeper try to survive in the freezing cold? Join now for a wild adventure unlike any other!

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Safe s are a technology Minecraft SMP

SECURITY, SAFES, safe panel, Criminals., Technology

Welcome to our Minecraft SMP, where safes are the hottest topic of conversation! Forget about building epic castles or mining for diamonds, we’re all about discussing the latest in safe technology.

Join our server and learn all about the evolution of safes over the years. From classic combination locks to cutting-edge biometric scanners, we’ve got it all. Who knew safes could be so fascinating?

But beware, in this world, safes are not just for storing your precious loot. The new class of criminals on our server are experts at cracking safes and will stop at nothing to get their hands on your valuables. It’s a dangerous game out there, so choose your safe wisely.

And remember, the best way to protect your treasures is by keeping them a secret. Don’t go flaunting your wealth or you might just find yourself in a sticky situation. Trust us, it’s better to play it safe (pun intended).

So come join us on our Minecraft SMP and become a safe-cracking expert in no time. Just be prepared for some wild adventures and crazy heists along the way. Who knew safes could be so much fun?

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