abstinator

Are you tired of worrying about heavy metals, nitrates, bacteria, and fluoride in your water? Well, on our server, you can drink straight from the virtual tap without a care in the world! No need for single-use plastic bottles here, just pure, pixelated hydration.

And speaking of health, we’ve got a friend named Jen who’s been gaining weight for the past 8 years and is now morbidly obese. But don’t worry, we’ve got plenty of virtual activities for her to enjoy without any limitations! Concert venues, hiking, farmers markets, kayaking – she can do it all in the Minecraft world.

But watch out, because if you dare offer Jen some tap water, she might just go off on you like a creeper exploding! She’s all about that bottled water life and won’t settle for anything less. And if you dare mention her weight gain or health concerns, be prepared for some explosive reactions!

So join us on our server for some laughs, some drama, and a whole lot of fun. Who knew virtual water could cause so much chaos? Let’s dive in and see what adventures await!