speed test thread Minecraft Servers | New Minecraft Servers 2025

Speed Test Thread Minecraft SMP

#datamining, Broadband, Country, data, data analysis, discussion, forum, internet, Minecraft, Network, ONLINE, Pacific Northwest, Paying, payment, PNW USA, smp, SPEED, speed test, speed test thread, Technology, test, Thread, Usa

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Players:	108/900	Votes:	479
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Glitched Entities Encountered:	4	Rune Stones Activated:	2
Inescapable Mazes Solved:	2	Storm Giants Negotiated With:	2
Ender Pearl Glitches:	5	Wilderness Tamed:	5
Titanic Battles Fought:	27	Warlock Amulets Crafted:	17
Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	3	Spontaneous Duels Fought:	14
Ender Dragon Reincarnations:	2	Celestial Crowns Worn:	4
Time-Warping Watches Found:	2	Dragon Eggs Found:	2650

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers that are as slow as a turtle stuck in molasses? Well, look no further because our server is so fast, it’ll make your head spin faster than a tornado in a hurricane! Join us and experience the thrill of lightning-speed gameplay that will leave you questioning if you’ve accidentally entered the Matrix.

But wait, there’s more! Our server is located in the mystical land of PNW USA, where unicorns roam free and diamonds grow on trees. Rumor has it that if you join our server, you’ll be granted three wishes by a magical leprechaun who lives in a mushroom hut. Want to fly like a bird? Done. Want to swim in a pool of lava without getting burned? Easy peasy. Want a lifetime supply of enchanted golden apples? Well, that might be pushing it, but hey, it’s worth a shot!

So what are you waiting for? Join our server now and embark on the wildest adventure of your Minecraft life. Who knows, you might even stumble upon a secret underground disco party hosted by creepers and skeletons. It’s a party you won’t want to miss!

Ex’s Dumb Quotes Minecraft Server

Breakup, dumb, ex advice, ex boyfriend, ex drama, ex girlfriend, ex humor, ex jokes, ex memories, ex problems, ex quotes, ex regrets, ex stories, ex talk, ex talk show, Exes, exes be like, Exs, funny ex quotes, Minecraft, quotes, relationships, Server, stupid ex

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Players:	99/1000	Votes:	4906
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Titan Hearts Harvested:	5	Wizards Turned into Frogs:	2
Vanishing Items Found:	3	Elemental Forces Harnessed:	12
Unique Catgirls Spotted:	1	Wilderness Tamed:	9
Whispering Caves Entered:	6	Battle Standards Raised:	13
Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	1	Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	1
Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	2	Moonlit Rituals Performed:	7
Spectral Entities Defeated:	6	Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	0

Join our Minecraft server and never have to worry about stupid exes again! Our server is a magical place where all exes are turned into pixelated pigs and forced to roam the land, forever regretting their dumb comments. So come on in and build your own fortress of solitude, far away from any ex drama. Plus, we have a secret potion that gives you the power to summon a giant chicken to peck at anyone who dares to bring up your ex’s nonsense. Trust us, you won’t find a server like this anywhere else!

PainCraft: Ouch Edition

acute pain, Agony, Chronic pain, coping with pain., Edition, emotional pain, excruciating pain, intense pain, Ouch, pain assessment, pain management, pain management strategies, pain management techniques, pain medication, pain relief, pain scale, pain threshold, pain tolerance, PainCraft, physical pain, Suffering, unbearable pain, worst pain

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Players:	106/600	Votes:	9483
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Demon Skulls Collected:	27	Sentient Weapons Trained:	4
Shattered Realms Restored:	2	Enchanted Forests Planted:	12
Cursed Lands Purified:	5	Forbidden Tomes Read:	2
Ether Blades Crafted:	5	Ancient Guardians Awoken:	3
Divine Relics Bestowed:	13	Wyrmholes Dug:	9
Nether Portals Gone Wrong:	1	Ores Mined:	8082
Dragon Hoards Looted:	3	Dimension Hops:	8

Have you ever been mining for diamonds in Minecraft and accidentally fell into a pit of lava? Well, that’s nothing compared to the pain of missing out on our epic Minecraft server! Join us for a wild ride filled with crazy adventures, hilarious shenanigans, and maybe even a few exploding creepers who just want to give you a hug (of death)! Trust us, the only pain you’ll feel on our server is from laughing too hard at all the ridiculousness that goes down. So what are you waiting for? Join now and let the fun begin!

MeatAssaults Minecraft Server

Armed Forces, civilian casualties, Conflict, defense mechanisms, eastern europe, geopolitical conflict, international relations, Invasion, meat assaults, MeatAssaults, military aggression, Military operations, military strategy, Minecraft, political turmoil, russia, Server, Siege Tactics, ukraine war, Ukraine’s defences, War Crimes, War Tactics, WARFARE

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Players:	110/100	Votes:	655
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	2	Runes Activated:	5
Wizards Turned into Frogs:	2	Immortal Potions Brewed:	13
Demon Skulls Collected:	47	Epic Bosses Defeated:	2
Love Letters Sent:	6	Glitched Entities Encountered:	0
Demonic Pacts Formed:	2	Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	1
Frozen Fortresses Conquered:	3	Meteor Showers Witnessed:	2
Quantum Bards Serenaded:	5	Chaos Gates Opened:	0

lol come join our epic minecraft server where we reenact the ukraine war but with MEAT. yes, you heard that right, we’re throwing meat at each other to batter down defences like a bunch of crazy meat warriors.

imagine charging into battle with a pork chop in hand, ready to take down your enemies with the power of protein. our server is like no other, with intense meat battles and hilarious moments that will have you laughing until your sides hurt.

join us now and be a part of the most ridiculous minecraft server out there. who knew that meat could be so powerful in the world of blocky adventures? come see for yourself and experience the chaos firsthand.

VenezuelaCraft: Redstone Revolution

defense cooperation, Diplomacy, election, foreign policy, geopolitical maneuvering, global politics, international relations, Latin America, maritime cooperation, Military, military deployment, military exercises, naval presence, Navy, political tension, Redstone, revolution, Russian, south america, strategic alliance, Venezuela, VenezuelaCraft, Warships

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Players:	97/100	Votes:	2614
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Ghost Miner’s Tools Found:	4	Eldritch Scrolls Read:	6
Inverted Worlds Discovered:	1	Magic Crystals Found:	8
Gorgon Shields Crafted:	3	Potions Brewed:	190
Shadow Daggers Crafted:	25	Legendary Items Repaired:	2
Immortal Anvils Forged:	18	Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	2
Ender Pearl Glitches:	4	New Chunks Explored:	749955
Forbidden Doors Opened:	3	Corrupted Trees Chopped:	4

come join our epic minecraft server where russian warships dock in venezuela but instead of war they just want to play minecraft with us. imagine sailing the high seas with putin himself as your captain, building epic bases on the shores of south america. join now for a chance to win a free trip on a russian warship to our server, where the only election is who builds the best redstone contraption. hurry before the kremlin shuts us down for being too epic!

MomGonePhoneGrief

coping, death, Difficult, emotional, family, Goodbye, Grief, hardest moment, healing, HEARTBREAK, Loss, love, Memories, MomGonePhoneGrief, Mother, mourning, moving on, Pain, Phone, Sadness, separation

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Players:	93/700	Votes:	4705
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Epic Quests Completed:	12	Crystal Wands Charged:	11
Wailing Winds Heard:	2	Infernal Machines Built:	0
Gnome Villages Protected:	5	Magical Familiars Summoned:	1
Wyrmholes Dug:	3	Godly Talismans Bestowed:	9
Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	1	Talking Trees Consulted:	5
Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	2	Dragon Hoards Looted:	2
Ender Pearl Glitches:	4	Potions Brewed:	126

Hey you! Yes, you with the sad face and the empty phone book! Are you tired of boring Minecraft servers with no pizzazz? Well, do we have the server for you! Join us for a wild ride filled with crazy adventures and wacky shenanigans.

Our server is so epic that even deleting your mother’s number from your phone will seem like a walk in the park compared to the challenges you’ll face here. We’ve got dragons, unicorns, and even a talking potato named Kevin who will guide you on your quest for glory.

But that’s not all! Join our server and you’ll have the chance to ride a rainbow llama into battle, build a castle made entirely of cheese, and even challenge the server owner to a dance-off for the title of Minecraft champion.

So what are you waiting for? Come join us on the craziest, most ridiculous Minecraft server you’ll ever experience. Who needs a full phone book when you’ve got us? Let’s get this party started!

PillMail Abortion Co. – No Ultrasound Needed!

2-year study, abortion, abortion patients, abortion pills, abortion regimen, complete abortion, drugs in person, Examination, mail, medication, Medication abortion, Needed, participants, PillMail, pills by mail, Regimen, repeat, study, UC San Francisco, Ultrasound, ultrasound examination

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Players:	96/1000	Votes:	2569
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Eclipse Rings Activated:	4	Endless Mazes Conquered:	1
Cursed Statues Activated:	1	Legendary Heroes Trained:	5
Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted:	3	Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	2
Enchantments Applied:	209	Legendary Armor Sets Assembled:	41
Epic Weapons Forged:	6	Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	1
Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	7	Unsolvable Puzzles Solved:	5
Mystical Amulets Crafted:	34	Astral Orbs Gathered:	16

join our epic minecraft server where we give out virtual pills that make your blocky character do crazy things like fly without wings or shoot fireballs out of their butt! no need for ultrasounds here, just pop a pill and watch the magic happen. 95% of our players have completed insane builds without having to repeat any steps. come join the fun and see what kind of wild adventures you can have on our server!

Noah’sPirateShip: Landlubber Edition

admins, application, Builder, Community, Create, Depth, Discord, Distant Horizons, Edition, Engineer, EXCITEMENT, Explorer, farmers delight, Landlubber, macaw’s furniture, Mods, NoahsPirateShip, Redstone, smp, storedrawers, thermal expansion, Vanilla, Whitelisted

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Players:	104/600	Votes:	4684
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Mysterious Portals Opened:	16	Immortal Potions Brewed:	8
Titanic Battles Fought:	24	Runic Tablets Deciphered:	22
Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	3	Curse of Binding Applied:	1
Astral Staffs Crafted:	9	God-Tier Weapons Forged:	22
Rainbows Spotted:	3	Mystery Villagers Spotted:	1
Secret Guilds Joined:	1	Haunted Mines Explored:	1
Eldritch Medallions Worn:	15	Portal Loops Escaped:	2

Welcome to Noah’s Ark SMP

Your Ultimate Minecraft Adventure Awaits!

About Noah’s Ark SMP

Join our vibrant community where creativity and camaraderie thrive! Our server combines a unique blend of mods to enhance your gameplay, ensuring endless hours of fun and exploration. Whether you’re a builder, explorer, or redstone engineer, you’ll feel right at home here.

How to Get Whitelisted

To join our exclusive server, just follow these simple steps:

Join our Discord: https://discord.gg/Egjq8wdUZz
Create a Ticket: Head to the “ticket-create” channel at the top.
Submit Your Application: Please include:
- Your in-game name
- Your favorite activity in Minecraft
- Interests outside of Minecraft
- What you’re looking for in an SMP server

Mods to Enhance Your Experience

Mod	Description
Create	Plus most of the additions
Thermal Expansion
Distant Horizons (optional)
Farmer’s Delight
StorageDrawers
Macaw’s Furniture, Bridges, Trapdoors, Windows
Serene Seasons
Twilight Forest
JourneyMap (no teleports)
Performance Mods

Join Our Discord: https://discord.gg/Egjq8wdUZz

Rules to Keep Our Community Fun and Safe

No Griefing: Respect other players’ builds.
Age Requirement: 14+. If under 16, parental/guardian consent is required.
Language: Keep bad language to a minimum; preferably no swearing.
PvP: Voluntary and requires mutual agreement.

FAQ

Q: How do I get whitelisted on the server? A: Join our Discord and follow the instructions for submitting an application in the “ticket-create” channel. Our admins will review your application and grant access if you meet the criteria.

Q: What mods are included on the server? A: Some of the highlighted mods include Create, Thermal Expansion, Farmer’s Delight, and more. Check the mod list for a comprehensive overview.

Q: Are there any age restrictions? A: Yes, the server has an age requirement of 14 and above. Players under 16 need parental or guardian consent to join.

UnstableCraft Minecraft Server

Average, Behavior, emotional well being, emotions, Human nature, instability, mental health, mental health awareness, mental stability, Minecraft, mood swings, personality changes, personality disorders, personality fluctuations, personality traits, Psychology, Server, societal changes, societal expectations, societal norms, society, unstable personalities, UnstableCraft

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Players:	96/500	Votes:	3052
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Vanishing Structures Built:	2	Undead Armies Raised:	0
Phantom Rings Equipped:	13	Dragon Scales Harvested:	375
Lost Artifacts Recovered:	5	Forbidden Tomes Read:	7
Mystical Amulets Crafted:	22	Enchanted Armories Found:	4
Cursed Swords Broken:	2	Magical Ponies Rescued:	4
Lost Souls Rescued:	4	Astral Amulets Crafted:	35
Ghost Miner’s Tools Found:	5	Ghost Trains Ridden:	2

Are you tired of dealing with unstable personalities in real life? Well, have we got the perfect escape for you! Join our Minecraft server and leave all the drama behind. Our players are so chill, they make ice cubes look hot! Plus, we have a secret potion that turns griefers into friendly unicorns. So come on over and leave the real world crazies behind!

FeedCraft Server – Fat & Funny Minecraft Server

anthropomorphic animals, artists, Beginners, booru, bump, bump limit, coloring, deliveries, drawing improvement, drawthread, edit, edits, Expansion, fat, FeedCraft, female, fictional creatures, funny, inflation, Loli, Male, Minecraft, Monster Girl, progress thread, Report, request anchor, Resources, Server, shota, Spam, underaged characters, weight gain

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Players:	99/100	Votes:	8572
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Werewolf Howls Heard:	5	New Chunks Explored:	711272
Ethereal Dreams Experienced:	19	Spectral Entities Defeated:	4
Mimic Chests Discovered:	5	Talking Trees Consulted:	4
Powerful Allies Recruited:	5	Magical Carpet Rides Taken:	4
Invisible Walls Found:	1	Eclipse Rings Activated:	2
Cursed Amulets Found:	2	Dimension-Hopping Bunnies Found:	4
Sunfire Helmets Forged:	8	Lunar Scepters Activated:	10

Looking for a Minecraft server that’s as expansive as your waistline after a trip to the all-you-can-eat buffet? Look no further than our server, where fat, expansion, and edit requests are welcomed with open arms (and expanding bellies).

Join us for a wild ride filled with requests for fat/weight gain/inflation/other expansion themed characters, whether they be human, monster girls, anthropomorphic animals, or even fictional creatures. Our community is as diverse as the sizes of our characters, so don’t be shy to make your wildest expansion dreams come true.

But wait, there’s more! Need help drawing your own fatties? We’ve got resources for beginners and pros alike, so you can join in on the fun and start creating your own chunky creations. Just remember to ignore the alogs, don’t hassle the artists, and most importantly, delete your bumps (if you don’t know how, just check out the FAQ on 4chan).

So come on down to our server, where the only limit is your imagination (and maybe your waistline). Who knows, you might just find yourself drawing the fattest, most expansive characters you’ve ever seen. Just remember, no loli/shota/underaged characters allowed – everyone hates that!

ChunkySibsCraft

alone, Argument, body image, Boundaries, ChunkySibsCraft, Communication, depression, family, fat, Fight, Grades, insult, Leave, messy room, Movie, self esteem, Siblings, sister, weight loss

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Players:	91/100	Votes:	222
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Titanic Battles Fought:	29	Animals Bred:	53
Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	4	Talking Trees Consulted:	5
Phantom Ships Sailed:	2	Cursed Swords Broken:	2
Enchantments Applied:	139	Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	1
Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	4	Evil Portals Destroyed:	1
Meteor Showers Witnessed:	2	Infinity Stones Found:	6
Shadow Figures Spotted:	7	Dragon Eggs Hatched:	2

Are you tired of dealing with sibling drama in real life? Then join our Minecraft server where you can escape to a world where siblings can’t annoy you! No more messy rooms or arguments about who gets to watch what on TV. On our server, you can build your own virtual paradise without any pesky sisters getting in your way.

Join us and leave behind the drama of real life for a world where you can focus on what truly matters – crafting, building, and exploring. Plus, with our friendly community of players, you’ll never have to worry about someone insulting your grades or your weight. In fact, on our server, the only thing that matters is having fun and unleashing your creativity.

So why wait? Join our Minecraft server today and say goodbye to sibling squabbles forever! Who knew that virtual blocks could be the key to sibling harmony?