MIG29 Minecraft Servers | New Minecraft Servers 2025

SecuredCraft SMP – LinuxLolz

desktop operating systems, Desktoptards, eBPF, Firejail, flatpak, GNU/Linux desktops, insecure, JIT compiler, JIT spraying, kernel, less secure, linux kernel, LinuxLolz, MacOS, malicious application, memory unsafe language, MS-DOS security model, no strong sandboxing, RCE vulnerability, sandboxing applications, SecuredCraft, security vulnerabilities, smp, Snap, unfixed bugs, user space code, W^X violation, Weak sandboxing, windows 10

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Players:	100/400	Votes:	230
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Reality Distortions Fixed:	1	Twisted Realms Survived:	1
Talking Trees Consulted:	3	Buildings Constructed:	34
Chaos Orbs Controlled:	9	Cosmic Pies Baked:	6
Celestial Blades Sharpened:	14	Unseen Monsters Slain:	3
Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	2	Holy Grails Found:	2
Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	0	Zombie Dances:	0
Tesseract Cubes Discovered:	3	Chaos Gates Opened:	2

Are you tired of those GNU/Linux desktoptards thinking they’re all that? Well, we’ve got the perfect place for you to show them who’s boss! Join our Minecraft SMP where we laugh in the face of weak sandboxing and insecure kernels.

Forget about Flatpak, Firejail, and Snap – we like to live life on the edge with all applications having access to each other’s data. Who needs privacy anyway, am I right?

And don’t even get us started on the kernel. It’s like running all user space code as root in PID 1 – talk about living dangerously! But hey, who needs security when you can have unfixed bugs and memory unsafe languages prone to bugs?

So if you’re looking for a wild ride filled with chaos, vulnerabilities, and a whole lot of laughs at the expense of GNU/Linux desktoptards, then come join our Minecraft SMP today! Just remember to bring your sense of humor and maybe a little bit of common sense too.

DadCare Minecraft Server

aita, baby, child, Communication, Conflict, dad, DadCare, family, Father, Frustration, involvement, Minecraft, Mother, neglect, newborn, parenting, RESPONSIBILITY, Server, sibling, sister, standing up, Support, work

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Players:	108/700	Votes:	7532
Rating:	4.0 / 5
Enchanted Forests Planted:	11	Royal Decrees Issued:	0
Volcanoes Explored:	3	Shadow Cloaks Sewn:	1
Starry Nights Enjoyed:	39	Magical Carpet Rides Taken:	2
Magical Familiars Summoned:	1	Sunfire Helmets Forged:	2
Falling into the Void:	1	Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	1
Epic Bosses Defeated:	1	Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	0
Hidden Villages Discovered:	2	Glorious Feasts Held:	6

Looking for a Minecraft server that will make you feel like a baby being taken care of by your mom? Look no further! Join our server where we promise to feed you, bathe you, and give you all the attention you need just like a newborn baby.

Just like the dad in the story, our staff may seem a bit lazy at times, but don’t worry, we’ll always come through in the end (hopefully). And if you ever feel neglected, just cry out for attention and we’ll make sure someone is there to distract you and make you feel special.

So come join us on our server where you’ll never have to worry about being ignored or left to fend for yourself. We may not be the most responsible parents, but we’ll definitely make sure you have a good time!

KidCutsNoMore

Barber, barbering techniques, child haircut, child’s rights, CLIPPERS, comfort, consent, discipline, emotional, Father, KidCutsNoMore, Moisturize, parenting, professional ethics, punishment, Razor, refusal, scalp care, Trauma, walk in

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Players:	91/700	Votes:	3952
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Phantom Ships Sailed:	1	Bizarre Potions Brewed:	6
Epic Quests Completed:	7	Disappearing Landscapes Witnessed:	1
Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	0	Battle Standards Raised:	14
Elemental Forces Harnessed:	3	Dragon Scales Harvested:	195
Royal Decrees Issued:	4	Ancient Dragons Awakened:	3
Cursed Villages Purged:	3	Cursed Amulets Found:	0
Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	2	Spectral Entities Defeated:	4

Welcome to our Minecraft server, where we promise not to give you a “punishment” haircut like the poor kid in this story! Our barbers are all trained in the art of pixelated hair cutting, so you can trust us to give you a stylish new ‘do without any tears or fears.

Join our server for a chance to experience the thrill of mining for diamonds while getting a virtual haircut at the same time! Who knows, maybe you’ll stumble upon a rare block that can transform your character’s hair into a fabulous rainbow color.

And don’t worry, we won’t force you to go bald unless you specifically ask for it. Unlike some parents out there, we believe in letting our players express themselves freely in the world of Minecraft. So come join us for a fun and hair-raising adventure like no other!

CraftyCash Minecraft Server

budgeting, CraftyCash, debt management, Financial Advice, financial choices, financial decisions, financial education, Financial goals, financial lessons, financial literacy, financial mistakes, Financial Planning, financial regrets, Financial Success, investing, long-term financial planning., Minecraft, money management, money mistakes, personal finance, saving money, Server, worst financial decision

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Players:	95/300	Votes:	9735
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Wilderness Tamed:	15	Hedge Mazes Navigated:	4
Cursed Artifacts Recovered:	27	Eldritch Medallions Worn:	12
Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	2	Phantom Horses Ridden:	2
Godly Talismans Bestowed:	13	Mineshafts Explored:	3
Royal Courts Attended:	1	Chaos Orbs Controlled:	18
Evil Lairs Raided:	6	Titan Hearts Harvested:	5
Gorgon Shields Crafted:	1	Ender Dragon Reincarnations:	1

Have you ever spent all your diamonds on a pig saddle, only to have the pig run off a cliff and explode into a million pieces? Well, fear not, because on our Minecraft server, you can make even worse financial decisions and still come out on top! Join us and experience the thrill of buying useless items from shady villagers, only to have them mysteriously disappear the next day. It’s like playing the stock market, but with more creepers! So come on down and see if you can bankrupt yourself in the most ridiculous ways possible. Who needs diamonds when you have the satisfaction of knowing you wasted them all on a giant statue of a chicken? Join now and start making terrible financial decisions today!

PunishCraft: Crime Edition

crime, crimes, criminal behavior, criminal justice, criminal justice reform, criminal penalties, Edition, harsher punishment, justice system, law enforcement, Legal System, lesser punishment, non-violent crimes, prison reform, PunishCraft, punishment, punishment severity, recidivism, reddit, Rehabilitation, sentencing, social justice, Violent crimes

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Players:	109/400	Votes:	3305
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Pirate Ships Raided:	0	Astral Projections Made:	3
Ores Mined:	1375	Legendary Items Repaired:	6
Mythical Quests Completed:	20	Mystic Mirrors Unlocked:	4
Endless Legions Commanded:	26	Meteor Showers Witnessed:	3
Dragon Eggs Found:	5362	Starry Nights Enjoyed:	24
Epic Battles Fought:	13	Astral Amulets Crafted:	17
Epic Bosses Defeated:	3	Battle Standards Raised:	12

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers where the only crime is stealing someone’s diamonds? Well, look no further because on our server, we have a whole new level of crime and punishment!

Join us if you want to see players get banished to the Nether for griefing, forced to mine obsidian with their bare hands for stealing, or even sentenced to a life of farming carrots for building ugly structures.

But don’t worry, not all crimes are treated equally on our server. Forget about getting a slap on the wrist for stealing a few blocks of wood, here you might just get a pat on the back and a free diamond sword for your efforts.

So come on down to our crazy Minecraft server where the crimes are wild and the punishments are even wilder. Who knows, you might just end up being the ruler of the server for pulling off the most epic heist of all time!

Zelenskyy’s Missile Mayhem Minecraft Server

Armed Forces, Conflict Resolution, Defense, defense industry, defense strategy, eastern europe, Geopolitics, international relations, MAYHEM, military capability, military strength, Minecraft, Missile, missile defense system, missile development, missile technology, Missiles, national security, peace negotiations, political leadership, Server, SOVEREIGNTY, Ukraine, zelenskyy, Zelenskyys

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Players:	100/300	Votes:	2000
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Enchanted Forests Planted:	4	Wishing Wells Wished Upon:	3
Endless Night Skies:	5	Dragon Scales Harvested:	276
Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	2	Cozy Campfires Lit:	22
Demonic Pacts Formed:	3	Pirate Ships Captured:	0
Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured:	1	Cosmic Pies Baked:	5
Secret Guilds Joined:	4	Forbidden Grimoires Read:	3
Warrior Spirits Summoned:	12	Celestial Blades Sharpened:	10

lol u ever wanted to join a minecraft server where u can launch ur own missiles like a boss? well guess what, this server is the place to be! we got zelenskyy himself approving the use of missiles in the game, so u know it’s gonna be lit af. join now and blow up ur enemies in style, cuz why not? #missilemadness #minecraftmayhem

CraftyUkrGeneral

Armed Forces, battle, Conflict, CraftyUkrGeneral, Defense, determination, eastern europe, general, Geopolitics, leadership, Military, opposition, perseverance, resilience, russia, strategy, strength, triumph, Ukraine, Unity, Victory

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Players:	103/600	Votes:	1164
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Bizarre Potions Brewed:	8	Mythical Swords Crafted:	54
Ancient Dragons Awakened:	1	Lunar Scepters Activated:	3
Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	3	Crops Grown:	5665
God-Tier Weapons Forged:	10	Enchanted Tomes Discovered:	150
Orbs of Power Found:	6	World-Altering Spells Cast:	0
Curse of Binding Applied:	5	Hidden Sanctuaries Discovered:	1
Arcane Secrets Unlocked:	13	Ghostly Villagers Traded With:	4

so like, ukraine’s top general was all like “i know we will win – and how” and i was like WHAAAT?! turns out he was talkin bout this EPIC minecraft server where they turned the tables against russia or somethin. like, imagine fightin off creepers and zombies while also takin down a whole army, that’s some next level stuff man. join this server for the ultimate battle experience and show russia who’s boss in the minecraft world. trust me, you won’t regret it, bro!

IronToothedDragons

animal, biology, evolutionary adaptation, iron-coated teeth, IronToothedDragons, Komodo dragons, natural defense, razor sharp, reptiles, reptilian features, scientific research, scientists, serrated edges, teeth coating, tooth durability, tooth enamel, tooth evolution, tooth structure, unique discovery, wear resistant, wildlife

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Players:	108/400	Votes:	2736
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Cursed Lands Purified:	10	Forbidden Relics Collected:	0
Talking Trees Consulted:	1	Nether Portals Gone Wrong:	3
Epic Mounts Acquired:	4	Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered:	3
Ender Pearl Glitches:	4	Reality-Warping Charms Crafted:	1
Forbidden Tomes Read:	3	Warlock Pacts Sealed:	3
Reality Warps Survived:	2	Elemental Forces Harnessed:	10
Infinity Stones Found:	5	Crystal Palaces Visited:	3

OMG, u gotta join dis server, cuz we got komodo dragons with IRON teeth! like, wut even?! dey got dis special coating dat makes dem teeth all sharp and stuff, like a freakin sword. it’s like dey been playin Minecraft in real life or sumthin. u gotta see it to believe it, man. join now and witness da craziness for yourself! #ironfangs #minecraftmadness

SpoiledSociety Minecraft Server

American women, celebration, cultural expectations, demonizing, discrimination, double standards, empowerment, equality, feminism, gender dynamics, gender inequality, Gender Roles, Men, Minecraft, patriarchy, Server, sexism, social norms, societal pressure, society, spoiled, SpoiledSociety, Stereotypes

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Players:	106/200	Votes:	9379
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Meteorites Collected:	2	Reality Warps Survived:	0
Enchanted Weapons Reforged:	8	Chaos Orbs Controlled:	5
Mythical Relics Collected:	19	Unholy Beasts Tamed:	1
Dragonkin Hatched:	4	Ghost Trains Ridden:	0
Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	3	Fabled Crowns Discovered:	6
Dimension Hops:	2	Legendary Heroes Trained:	1
Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	7	Starry Nights Enjoyed:	29

Tired of American women getting all the attention while their men are being thrown under the bus? Join our Minecraft server where the roles are reversed! Here, men are treated like kings while the women are the ones fighting for equality. Build your own kingdom, slay dragons, and show those ladies who’s boss in this wacky world where gender norms are flipped upside down. So come on, join us and experience a truly unique gaming experience that will have you questioning everything you thought you knew about society!

Normie95% Minecraft SMP

addiction, Behavior, blocked responses, coping mechanisms, Disgusting, Drugs, escapism, excessive internet usage, feelings, judgment, Minecraft, morality, Natural, Normie, Normie95, personal growth, porn, SELF AWARENESS, self-control, shame, smp, societal norms, societal standards

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Players:	95/300	Votes:	4594
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Darkness Engulfments Escaped:	2	Mineshafts Explored:	2
Quantum Bards Serenaded:	5	Celestial Blades Sharpened:	15
Legendary Heroes Trained:	1	Portal Loops Escaped:	3
Moonlit Rituals Performed:	4	Haunted Forests Traversed:	6
Duplicated Mobs Battled:	3	Eldritch Abominations Befriended:	0
Enchanted Forests Planted:	3	Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	2
Battle Standards Raised:	13	Mines Excavated:	4848

Are you tired of being a normie surrounded by disgusting people who have lost all sense of shame due to their excessive drug use, porn addiction, and internet obsession? Well, have no fear because our Minecraft SMP is here to rescue you from the depths of depravity! Join us and escape the clutches of the unholy trinity of drugs, porn, and internet usage. Our server is a safe haven for normies like you who still have a shred of decency left in them. So come on over and let’s build a world free from the filth and debauchery that plagues the rest of the internet. Join us now and reclaim your dignity in the most lolzy way possible!