jacked off Minecraft Servers | New Minecraft Servers 2025

Crafty Creeper Massage Parlor: Where Minecraft meets relaxation and questionable inquiries!

Advertised Prices, Asian culture, Asian Massage, Boundaries, Breach the Subject, Communication, consent, convenience, Crafty, creeper, funny business, inquiries, jacked off, Loss, MASSAGE, Massage Parlors, meets, Minecraft, Offending, PARLOR, Perverts, Professionalism, Questionable, Regular Massage, Relaxation, Respect, social etiquette, Tips, Tug Shack

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Players:	104/1000	Votes:	3548
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Crops Grown:	9499	Chimeras Created:	2
Dimensional Rifts Closed:	2	Rune Stones Activated:	4
Pirate Ships Captured:	1	Legendary Heroes Trained:	4
Dragon Scales Harvested:	466	Magic Wands Crafted:	23
Heavenly Choirs Heard:	4	Leprechaun Gold Stolen:	2
Glitched Entities Encountered:	2	Cursed Lands Purified:	7
Enchanted Weapons Reforged:	10	Mythical Beasts Vanquished:	3

Welcome to our Minecraft server, where you can escape the awkwardness of Asian Massage Parlors and dive into a world of blocky adventures! Join us for a massage-free experience like no other, where you can mine, build, and craft to your heart’s content without any funny business.

Our server is the perfect place to relax and unwind, without the pressure of getting a happy ending. We guarantee that no one will try to jack you off while you’re playing, unless you count getting jacked up on excitement from all the fun activities we have to offer!

So come join us on our server, where the only thing getting touched is your creative side. Say goodbye to awkward encounters and hello to a world of endless possibilities. Trust us, you won’t find a more relaxing and hilarious Minecraft server out there!

SinwarCraft – Not Your Average Cross-Dressing Server

Average, crossdressing, disguise, disguise techniques, dressed as a woman, elusive target, fugitive, Gaza Strip, gender disguise, Hamas Leader, hiding in plain sight, hiding tactics, intelligence reports, Middle East conflict, militant leader, Palestinian, political figure, secret identity, security threat, Server, SinwarCraft, undercover, Wanted Man, Yahya Sinwar

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Players:	105/900	Votes:	8847
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Paranormal Events Investigated:	1	Secret Guilds Joined:	5
Unsolvable Puzzles Solved:	1	Nether Portals Gone Wrong:	4
Ender Dragon Reincarnations:	3	Ancient Ruins Explored:	3
Mysterious Portals Opened:	8	Arcane Towers Raised:	1
Ender Pearl Glitches:	5	Cursed Scrolls Read:	5
Infinity Stones Found:	1	Warrior Spirits Summoned:	34
Inverted Worlds Discovered:	1	Meteorites Collected:	3

come join our epic minecraft server where yahya sinwar is hiding in plain sight dressed as a woman! you never know when he will pop out and start building with you! maybe he will even challenge you to a build battle while wearing his fabulous dress! join now for the chance to meet this mysterious figure and uncover all the secrets he holds in our wacky world of blocks and pixels!

HiberCraft: Save Lives & Chill

Chill, critical care, DNP, donepezil, DRUG, drug repurposing, emergency medicine, emergency response, HiberCraft, hibernation-like state, Hospital, innovative treatment, life-saving intervention, lives, medical breakthrough, medical emergencies, medical innovation, organ damage, patient survival, repurposed, Save, save lives, suspended animation, time-sensitive treatment

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Players:	101/100	Votes:	2357
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Cosmic Entities Communed With:	2	Mythical Creatures Tamed:	2
Leprechaun Gold Stolen:	2	Phantom Knights Defeated:	3
Cursed Swords Broken:	2	Ghost Miner’s Tools Found:	4
Forgotten Legends Remembered:	7	Immortal Potions Brewed:	5
Epic Battles Fought:	19	Magical Familiars Summoned:	3
Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	2	Doomsday Clocks Constructed:	0
Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	2	Astral Amulets Crafted:	40

Yo, listen up gamers! Ever wanted to join a Minecraft server where you can literally go into suspended animation like you’re in a sci-fi movie? Well, guess what? Our server has got you covered!

We’ve got this crazy drug called Donepezil or DNP that can put you in a hibernation-like state, slowing down organ damage and giving you more time to reach the hospital in case of emergencies. Imagine being chased by a creeper and just popping a pill to go into suspended animation, giving you a chance to escape and come back to fight another day!

Join our server now and experience the wildest medical emergencies in Minecraft history! Who needs potions when you’ve got suspended animation drugs, am I right? Let’s save lives and have a blast doing it!

NaziHavenMC Server

anti-semitism, Aryan Nations, extremism, extremism in America, extremism in Idaho, far right, hate crimes, hate groups, Hate Speech, History, hyperborea, Idaho, Nazi haven, NaziHavenMC, neo-nazis, Northern Idaho, Pacific Northwest, racism, Server, white nationalism, white separatism, White Supremacy

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Players:	94/400	Votes:	3834
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	7	Friendship Bracelets Exchanged:	75
Cosmic Entities Communed With:	2	Magical Beanstalks Grown:	2
Votes:	682	Animals Bred:	197
Witch’s Brew Drunk:	8	Corrupted Trees Chopped:	1
Cursed Villages Purged:	3	Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered:	2
Inverted Worlds Discovered:	0	Gods Slained:	2
Epic Quests Completed:	30	Treasure Maps Found:	6

Looking for a Minecraft server that’s as wild as the idea of Nazis hiding out in northern Idaho? Look no further! Our server is so crazy, it’ll make you question everything you thought you knew about history. Join us and uncover the secrets of Hyperborea in northern Idaho – who knew Minecraft could be so scandalous? Plus, rumor has it that Herobrine himself is a regular player on our server, so you never know when you might run into the infamous ghostly figure. Join now for a gaming experience that’s more twisted than a pretzel in a tornado!

TroonityCraft SMP – BTFOrealm

Argument, BELIEF, BTFO, BTFOrealm, Christroons, Concept, criticism, debate, Debunked, deluding, disbelief, doctrine, FAITH, Habit, Insanity, Religion, response, skepticism, smp, theology, Trinity, TROONITY, TroonityCraft

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Players:	98/700	Votes:	2378
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Alien Abductions:	2	Vanishing Items Found:	6
Magical Familiars Summoned:	2	Paranormal Events Investigated:	5
Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	2	Magic Wands Crafted:	19
Potions Brewed:	39	Haunted Chests Opened:	5
Titanic Relics Retrieved:	4	Void Armor Forged:	27
Villages Defended:	15	Titanic Battles Fought:	11
Dimensional Rifts Closed:	3	Epic Bosses Defeated:	3

Are you tired of the same old boring Minecraft SMPs where everyone takes themselves too seriously? Well, look no further because our server is here to shake things up! We’ve got players so skilled, they make Trinity look like a bunch of noobs. Christroons? More like Chri-sto-gone because they won’t stand a chance against our epic community.

Join us if you want to witness the ultimate showdown between the forces of good and the forces of…well, not so good. Our players are so dedicated, they’ll do anything to come out on top, even if it means sacrificing their diamond armor in a lava pit.

So why wait? Join our Minecraft SMP today and prepare for the wildest ride of your gaming life. Who knows, you might even become the next legend of our server, known far and wide for your epic builds and insane PvP skills. Don’t miss out on the chaos and craziness that awaits you!

MethCraftMILKickout

anger, baby, cut contact, danger, Date night, DAUGHTER, family, forgiveness, grandmother, harsh response, Help, horrible decision, MethCraftMILKickout, mother-in-law, ring doorbell, slip ups, smoking meth, Sober, Threats

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Players:	105/100	Votes:	767
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Titanic Battles Fought:	18	Volcanoes Explored:	3
Unholy Beasts Tamed:	3	Epic Battles Fought:	19
Legendary Items Repaired:	3	Cursed Diamonds Mined:	3
Celestial Blades Sharpened:	12	Cosmic Entities Communed With:	2
Cursed Amulets Found:	1	Paranormal Events Investigated:	4
Underground Cities Explored:	2	Unsolvable Puzzles Solved:	3
Astral Orbs Gathered:	13	Vanishing Structures Built:	1

Looking for a Minecraft server that’s crazier than your mother-in-law smoking meth on your front porch? Look no further! Join our server for a wild ride filled with unexpected twists and turns.

Our server is so insane, it’ll make your family drama look like child’s play. We promise you won’t find any mother-in-laws smoking meth here (unless they’re role-playing, of course).

Join now and experience the thrill of cutting off toxic family members while building your dream Minecraft world. Who needs family drama when you can have blocky adventures instead? So come on, join us and leave the real-life craziness behind!

CreeperExGoneMad

BETRAYAL, Breakup, Closure, controlling behavior, crazy ex, CreeperExGoneMad, emotional baggage, ex, HEARTBREAK, Insecurity, Jealousy, love gone wrong, Manipulation, moving on, possessiveness, red flags, relationships, Revenge, toxic behavior, unhealthy attachment, warning signs

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Players:	109/300	Votes:	5624
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Dimension Hops:	14	Legendary Heroes Trained:	1
Horror Stories Survived:	1	Ancient Ruins Explored:	3
Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	2	Starry Nights Enjoyed:	16
Paranormal Events Investigated:	4	Dimensional Rifts Closed:	1
Undead Armies Raised:	4	Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured:	2
Bizarre Potions Brewed:	12	Celestial Crowns Worn:	4
Players Killed by Monsters:	8666	Cursed Artifacts Recovered:	18

Are you tired of dealing with your crazy ex in real life? Well, we’ve got the perfect solution for you – join our Minecraft server and let out all your frustrations in a virtual world! Build a giant statue of your ex and then blow it up with TNT, or create a maze full of traps to symbolize the emotional rollercoaster they put you through. Trust us, nothing is more therapeutic than pixelated revenge! Plus, rumor has it that your ex is also playing on the server, so you can finally settle the score once and for all in a battle to the death (in-game, of course). Join now and let the drama unfold!

CraftyTelegram Minecraft Server

Ban, Censorship, Communication, communication app, CraftyTelegram, digital rights, ENCRYPTION, Government, India, internet, investigation, legal action, messaging app, messaging platform, Minecraft, privacy, regulatory scrutiny, SECURITY, Server, social media, Technology, Telegram, user data

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Players:	108/1000	Votes:	457
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Frozen Fortresses Conquered:	4	Animals Bred:	117
Secret Libraries Discovered:	3	Meteorite Armor Created:	27
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	38	Tesseract Cubes Discovered:	2
Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	1	God-Tier Weapons Forged:	45
Corrupted Trees Chopped:	1	Starry Nights Enjoyed:	37
Dragon Scales Harvested:	369	Backwards Speech Heard:	2
Unicorn Sightings:	1	Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	11

so, this server is like a wild ride through a land of blocky chaos and madness. we got pigs flying, creepers dancing, and villagers trading like there’s no tomorrow. but wait, there’s more! rumor has it that if you dig deep enough, you’ll find a secret portal to a dimension where everything is made of cake. yes, you heard that right, CAKE.

if that’s not enough to get you excited, how about this: our admin is a talking llama who can grant you three wishes if you bring him a diamond block. oh, and did i mention that our spawn point is actually a giant disco ball that plays dubstep remixes of classic minecraft tunes?

so come join us on this crazy adventure, where the only limit is your imagination (and maybe a few server rules, but who’s counting?). trust me, you won’t regret it. unless you’re allergic to fun, in which case, maybe stay away.

CraftyCreeperClan

aggression, Conflict, CraftyCreeperClan, Defense, Diplomacy, escalation, foreign policy, international relations, iran, Israel, lebanon, MIDDLE EAST, Military Action, political strategy, regional dynamics, response, retaliate, SECURITY, strike, Tension, US

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Players:	91/800	Votes:	2708
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Dragonkin Hatched:	5	Chaos Gates Opened:	1
Evil Portals Destroyed:	1	Chimeras Created:	1
Fabled Crowns Discovered:	6	Lunar Scepters Activated:	4
Dragons Tamed:	6	Leprechaun Gold Stolen:	4
Curse of Binding Applied:	5	Cozy Campfires Lit:	8
Hidden Passages Discovered:	4	Void Gems Collected:	20
Animals Bred:	107	Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	1

so, like, this server is like, the bomb diggity, bro! like, we got all the cool stuff you could ever want in a minecraft server. we got, like, flying pigs and rainbow unicorns that shoot lasers out of their eyes.

and get this, dude, we have a secret underground base where we keep all the rarest items in the game. like, we got a diamond pickaxe that can mine a whole chunk in one hit. it’s totally legit, i swear.

oh, and did i mention we have a pet dragon that you can ride around the server? yeah, it’s pretty epic.

so, like, join our server now before iran retaliates or something. you won’t regret it, bro. it’s gonna be lit.

CovidCraft: Populist Pandemonium

adoption, Anti-establishment, Attitudes, Beliefs, conspiracy mentality, Covid-19, CovidCraft, Economy, INDIVIDUALS, left wing, less-educated, pandemic, Pandemonium, Political, populist, Psychology, societal threats, society, Stronger, threatened, Views, Women

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Players:	108/100	Votes:	7879
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Forgotten Legends Remembered:	5	Meteor Showers Witnessed:	2
Love Letters Sent:	16	Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	3
Phantom Ships Sailed:	1	Players Killed by Monsters:	6275
Magic Wands Crafted:	11	Soul Swords Wielded:	4
Enchanted Teapots Collected:	14	Forbidden Grimoires Read:	3
Votes:	3039	Dragons Tamed:	5
Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	3	Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted:	2

come join our epic minecraft server where we fight off the evil establishment with our pickaxes and swords! if you’re tired of society’s bs, this is the place for you! we predict conspiracy theories and fight off covid-19 with our virtual blocks! women, less-educated peeps, and left-wingers are our strongest warriors, so come join the rebellion! let’s show the establishment who’s boss in the world of blocks and pixels!

MineCraftyGig – Genshin Impact Minecraft Server

Aqua Simulacra, Character Teaser, Character Trailer, Daily check-in rewards, EMILIE, Energy Amplifier, genshin, genshin impact, Impact, Lumidouce Elegy, Minecraft, MineCraftyGig, Mualani Web Event, Natlan Gameplay, Natlan Impressions Trailer, Off We Go to the Nation of Pyro, primogems, Razor, Redeemable Codes, Server, Summertide Scales and Tales, Third-Party Tools, useful links, Version 5.0, Xiangling, Yanfei, Yelan

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Players:	94/800	Votes:	9922
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Spells Gone Horribly Wrong:	6	Dragon Hoards Looted:	3
Undead Armies Raised:	3	Godly Talismans Bestowed:	13
Endless Night Skies:	2	Cursed Diamonds Mined:	6
Elemental Forces Harnessed:	8	Falling into the Void:	3
Spectral Entities Defeated:	7	Twisted Realms Survived:	3
Astral Staffs Crafted:	13	Pirate Ships Raided:	0
Dungeon Sieges Launched:	3	Star Shards Collected:	230

Looking for a Minecraft server that’s more lit than a Creeper explosion? Look no further, because our server is hotter than a Nether fortress on fire! Join now for a chance to win a diamond pickaxe that can mine bedrock, a potion of invincibility, and a pet Ender Dragon that will follow you around and roast your enemies!

Our server is so epic, even Herobrine himself is scared to log on. We’ve got custom biomes that are so wild, you’ll think you’re in the End dimension. And our players are so skilled, they can build a replica of the entire Minecraft world in just one day!

But wait, there’s more! Join now and you’ll get access to secret dungeons filled with rare loot, a PvP arena where you can battle it out with other players, and a secret society of villagers who will trade you enchanted items for emeralds.

So what are you waiting for? Join our server today and experience Minecraft like never before. Just be careful, because once you join, you may never want to leave!