GLEN CAMPBELL

Our server is so dairy-free, even the cows are lactose intolerant. That’s right, you won’t find a single block of cheese or splash of milk anywhere in sight. And if you accidentally eat something with dairy in it, don’t worry, your character won’t get sick, but they might start mooing like a cow for a few minutes.

But wait, there’s more! We have special quests where you must rescue the dairy cows from the evil cheese factory, and if you succeed, you’ll be rewarded with a lifetime supply of dairy-free ice cream. And rumor has it, there’s a secret level where you can ride a giant tofu block through a field of dairy products, smashing them to pieces.

So come join us on our dairy-free Minecraft server, where lactose intolerance is celebrated and dairy is nothing but a distant memory. Your stomach will thank you, and your in-game character will never have to suffer through a dairy-induced bathroom break again.