On September 16, 2023, a rockmass the size of a freakin’ rugby stadium detached and fell like a clumsy noob down a slope. The resulting megatsunami had a peak height of over 200m, taller than a giant zombie trying to dunk a basketball. It was as tall as 60m along a 10km stretch, making it the most insane ride you’ll ever experience in Minecraft!
So, what are you waiting for? Join our server now and ride the waves of destruction like a pro. Just remember to bring your floaties and a sense of humor, ’cause things are about to get wild, yo!
Hello! We are an 18+ vanilla Java Minecraft server that strives to create the best SMP experience. Whether you are a builder, explorer, or casual Minecraft enjoyer, we welcome all players. Build a base in the vast world of Minecraft, go on a shopping spree in the shopping district, and participate in games with other members. No one can tell you what you can or cannot do (except for griefing…)
You will find a tight-knit community here with players from all over the world. With some minor datapack QOL improvements and buttery-smooth performance from Purpur, you can’t ask for much more – that being said, we’re always open to suggestions! Life can be stressful, but Global SMP is your getaway from the real world – without the hassle of travel!
If you are interested in joining us, please join our discord read the rules and then click apply-here!
| Question | Answer |
|---|---|
| What is the minimum age to play on the server? | Players must be 18 years or older to join. |
| Are there any restrictions on gameplay? | Griefing is not allowed, but other than that, players are free to play as they wish. |
| Are there any plugins or mods on the server? | We use some minor datapack QOL improvements and Purpur for performance, but it is mostly vanilla. |
| How can I join the server? | Join our Discord, read the rules, and then follow the application process. |
| Can I suggest new features for the server? | Yes, we are always open to suggestions from our community. |
1. Our elves are so slutty that they make the Ender Dragon blush. You won’t find a more scandalous group of elves anywhere else in the Minecraft universe.
2. The pastebins are so spicy, you’ll need a fire resistance potion just to read them. Trust me, you don’t want to miss out on the drama and intrigue of our server.
3. We have a machine translation tool that will make you question reality. Who needs accurate translations when you can have hilarious mistranslations instead?
4. Our RPG Maker games will have you questioning your sanity. Get ready for a wild ride through a world of pixelated madness.
5. And don’t even get me started on the RJ Code Quicklink Script. It’s so revolutionary, it’ll make you feel like you’re hacking into the Matrix.
So come join us on our Minecraft server, where the elves are slutty, the translations are wacky, and the RPG Maker games will blow your mind. Just make sure to wait for page 10 before making a new thread – we have standards, you know.
Join us for a chance to experience the ultimate Minecraft baby gender reveal party! Will it be a boy or a girl? Who knows, but one thing’s for sure – there will be fireworks, confetti, and maybe even a surprise appearance from a baby zombie!
But wait, there’s more! Our server is filled with crazy twists and turns, just like this story of a husband who only wants a boy baby and threatens to leave if it’s a girl. Who knew Minecraft could be so scandalous?
So if you’re looking for a Minecraft server that will keep you on your toes and make you laugh until your sides hurt, join us now! Who knows what other shenanigans you’ll encounter along the way.
With mandatory bi-weekly visits from social workers and the constant drama of being separated from your siblings, you’ll never have a dull moment on our server. Plus, you can even adopt new parents just like our player did – who needs a boring old family when you can have a Minecraft family instead?
So come on over and join the chaos – because who needs a peaceful Minecraft experience when you can have a rollercoaster of emotions and drama instead? See you in the game, and remember – family drama makes for the best Minecraft adventures!
Join us and experience the thrill of building a base with your loved one, fighting off creepers side by side, and even going on romantic mining dates in the depths of the Nether. Who needs couple’s therapy when you can bond over crafting enchanted gear and battling the Ender Dragon together?
Plus, rumor has it that if you and your partner build a heart-shaped house, you’ll unlock a secret chest filled with rare loot and a pet panda that will follow you around and give you relationship advice. So what are you waiting for? Join our SMP now and show the world that love truly conquers all, even in the world of Minecraft!
Join us for epic adventures, crazy challenges, and non-stop laughter. We’ve got a secret underground base filled with diamonds, a pet dragon that shoots fireballs, and a rollercoaster that goes through a lava-filled volcano.
But that’s not all! Our server is also home to the legendary Chicken King, who rules over the land with an iron beak. Rumor has it that if you can defeat him in a dance-off, he’ll grant you three wishes.
So why waste your time on those other servers when you could be living it up with us? Come join the fun and see what all the clucking is about!
Our server is run by the head of the Kherson regional administration, who is basically a mad scientist when it comes to blowing stuff up. He’s like the Willy Wonka of explosions, except instead of candy, he’s giving out BOOMS left and right.
Join us if you dare, and see if you have what it takes to survive the chaos and mayhem of our explosive world. And who knows, maybe you’ll even become besties with the head honcho himself. So what are you waiting for? Come on over and let the fireworks begin!