🔥anal only Minecraft Servers | New Minecraft Servers 2025

This is Mike Minecraft SMP Adriano

2021, Adriano, anal only, ASSES, Chinese debt, Chinese government, federal indictment, foreign business dealings, global banking family., grand jury, hunter biden, investigations, laptop, Lord Jacob Rothschild, mike, Mike Adriano, Minecraft, NYT reporter, political deal, ponzi scheme, private equity firm, savings bonds, smp, Southern District of New York, spy balloon, Swallowed, switzerland, tongue fucking, Treasury, US debt, us foreign policy, world banking industry

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Players:	106/400	Votes:	9592
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	13	Endermen Teleportation Errors:	5
Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	2	Mythical Creatures Tamed:	5
Divine Relics Bestowed:	6	Unholy Beasts Tamed:	3
Battle Standards Raised:	11	Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered:	2
Crystal Palaces Visited:	3	Witch’s Brew Drunk:	12
Hidden Passages Discovered:	3	Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	2
Evil Portals Destroyed:	1	Invisible Walls Found:	1

Welcome to our Minecraft SMP, where even porn stars like Mike Adriano have a side hustle of saving the world from the banking industry’s ponzi schemes! Join us for some tongue-in-cheek fun as we uncover outrageous plots involving Hunter Biden, Lord Jacob Rothschild, and Chinese spy balloons. Witness as Chris Buckley spills the tea on shady deals and how a pornographic actor like Mike Adriano becomes the unexpected hero in stopping the world from financial chaos. Who knew that a Minecraft server could be the key to unraveling global conspiracies? Come join us and be a part of the madness!

SkinnyCraft

advice, Before and after, determination, diet, Exercise, FITNESS, goal-setting, Healthy Eating, inspiration, lifestyle changes, meal planning, motivation, perseverance, progress tracking, self-discipline, SkinnyCraft, success stories, Tips, weight loss, weight loss journey, workout routine

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Players:	101/700	Votes:	5072
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Dragons Tamed:	7	Celestial Events Witnessed:	4
Cursed Diamonds Mined:	7	Epic Battles Fought:	10
Potions Brewed:	128	Phantom Horses Ridden:	4
Pockets of Chaos Discovered:	2	Herobrine Sightings:	4
Gryphons Tamed:	2	Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	5
Meteor Showers Witnessed:	2	Magical Beanstalks Grown:	3
Phantom Knights Defeated:	8	Mysterious Portals Opened:	20

Are you tired of being a chunky Minecraft character? Well, look no further because our server will have you shedding those blocky pounds in no time! Our virtual world is filled with intense workouts like mining for diamonds, sprinting away from creepers, and jumping over lava pits. You’ll be so busy trying to survive, you won’t even realize you’re getting fit! Plus, our secret potion recipes will have you slimming down faster than you can say “Ender Dragon”. Join now and get ready to say goodbye to those extra virtual pixels!

HouthisAttackMCServer: LeakinOil

ATTACKED, Conflict, energy security, global economy, Gulf of Oman, Houthis, HouthisAttackMCServer, international relations, iran, leaking oil, LeakinOil, maritime security, MIDDLE EAST, military intervention, MV Sounion, oil supply, oil tanker, Saudi Arabia, Strait of Hormuz, Tanker, United States Navy, US

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Players:	108/900	Votes:	1253
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Glorious Feasts Held:	14	Blood-Forged Axes Created:	11
Soul Contracts Signed:	5	God-Tier Weapons Forged:	19
Phantom Ships Sailed:	3	Spontaneous Duels Fought:	4
Dimension-Hopping Bunnies Found:	4	Emeralds Found:	7129
Powerful Allies Recruited:	5	Fabled Crowns Discovered:	5
Immortal Anvils Forged:	20	Phoenix Feathers Found:	7
Runes Activated:	5	Epic Battles Fought:	5

hey u! u like minecraft? u like craziness? well, do i have the server for u! come join us on this wild ride where anything goes! we have so much fun, u won’t even remember what real life is like!

picture this: u and ur friends are mining for diamonds when suddenly a giant chicken appears out of nowhere and starts chasing u! but don’t worry, our admins are always there to save the day and turn that chicken into a disco ball!

oh, and did i mention the secret underground lair filled with treasure and llamas wearing top hats? yep, that’s right! only the bravest adventurers can find it and claim the riches inside!

so what are u waiting for? join us on MV Sounion and let the madness begin! who knows, u might even become the king of the server and have all the other players bowing down to u in awe!

MissileMayhemMC

air defense, Conflict, Defense, defense operations, defense systems, defense technology, eastern europe, f-16, first, intercept, international relations, jets, Military, Military Aircraft, MissileMayhemMC, Missiles, nato, News, Russian, SECURITY, Ukraine

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Players:	93/1000	Votes:	2704
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Lunar Scepters Activated:	6	Gnome Villages Protected:	5
Invisible Pathways Walked:	2	Unsolvable Puzzles Solved:	1
Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted:	3	Heroic Oaths Sworn:	21
Mysterious Portals Opened:	12	Phantom Horses Ridden:	1
Magical Ponies Rescued:	7	Titanic Battles Fought:	30
Holy Grails Found:	5	Emeralds Found:	3775
Shattered Realms Restored:	0	Legendary Armor Sets Assembled:	49

so, like, u know how ukraine is all like, “oh no, russia is sending missiles our way”? well, guess what, our server is so lit that we have ukraine’s f-16 jets intercepting those missiles like it’s just another tuesday. join us and be part of the most epic battles in minecraft history. who needs peace talks when u can just hop on our server and take down some russian missiles with ur bare hands (well, virtual bare hands, but u get the point). come join the chaos and show russia who’s boss in the most insane way possible. u won’t regret it, promise.

ProfitCraft71

American workers, business owners, corporate executives, corporate greed, corporate profits, economic disparity, economic injustice, economic system, employee productivity, financial inequality, income inequality, labor exploitation, ProfitCraft71, PROFITS, shareholders, social inequality, us economy, wage stagnation., wealth distribution, Wealth Inequality, Working class

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Players:	97/600	Votes:	2158
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	3	Darkness Engulfments Escaped:	4
Tesseract Cubes Discovered:	4	Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered:	1
Enchanted Armories Found:	10	Epic Shields Constructed:	28
Divine Spears Created:	28	Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	3
Herobrine Sightings:	0	Secret Passages Found:	8
Warlock Amulets Crafted:	12	Eldritch Scrolls Read:	6
Runes Activated:	8	Fabled Crowns Discovered:	4

come join our epic minecraft server where u can mine for diamonds and build ur own empire like a boss. we got pigs that can fly and chickens that lay golden eggs. u can even ride on a dragon and battle against evil creepers.

we have a secret underground base where u can find hidden treasures and fight off zombies with ur trusty sword. u can also team up with other players to take down the ender dragon and become the ultimate champion of the server.

plus, all the profits from ur hard work go directly to u, not some greedy shareholders. so come join us and start living the minecraft dream today!

Rootscraft — where cavemen trade rocks for diamonds and call it ‘civilization’ lol

Call, cavemen, Civilization, Create, death, diamonds, European, Guide, Install, lol, Mechanics, Mods, Nations, Numbers, process, Resounding Success, rocks, Roleplay, roleplay moment, Rootscraft, sparse food, Survival, TOKEN, Trade, Tribes, tuned-down, voice chat

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Players:	95/100	Votes:	2492
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Divine Spears Created:	18	Unbreakable Curses Broken:	1
Herobrine Sightings:	1	Wailing Winds Heard:	3
Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	3	Shadow Daggers Crafted:	15
Mysterious Portals Opened:	15	Dragons Adopted as Pets:	5
Eldritch Abominations Befriended:	0	Cursed Artifacts Recovered:	15
Secret Passages Found:	4	Holy Grails Found:	4
Pirate Ships Captured:	1	Wyrmholes Dug:	10

Rootscraft Minecraft Server

Overview:

Continent Setting	European-esque continent
Tribes/Nations	Players encouraged to group into tribes or nations
Notable Mods	Terrafirmacraft, Firmalife, Voice Chat, Create
Gameplay	Cold mechanics, sparse food, group survival

FAQ:

Question	Answer
How can I join the server?	You can join by following the link to our Discord server: https://discord.gg/UVdhKKzY6m
Are the mods difficult to install?	No, the mods are extremely easy to install and we can guide you through the process.
Is PvP allowed on the server?	Yes, interactions with other players are frequent and PvP is allowed within certain guidelines.
How do I earn tokens for survival?	You earn tokens by completing interesting roleplay moments with your group.

SufferCraft Minecraft Server

Awareness, compassion, contemplation, current events, deep thoughts, emotional connection, emotional response, Empathy, empathy for others, feeling overwhelmed, Global Issues, global suffering, Humanity, mindfulness, Minecraft, Reflection, Server, social justice, Societal Problems, SufferCraft, Suffering, tfw, world

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Players:	106/600	Votes:	1482
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Emeralds Found:	1641	Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	1
Phantom Rings Equipped:	25	Astral Projections Made:	4
Celestial Dragons Tamed:	1	Ender Dragon Reincarnations:	1
Lunar Scepters Activated:	11	Cuddly Creatures Pet:	48
Reality-Warping Charms Crafted:	3	Gnome Villages Protected:	8
Doomsday Clocks Constructed:	2	Werewolf Howls Heard:	5
Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	1	Hidden Sanctuaries Discovered:	2

Are you tired of the real world bringing you down with all its suffering and sadness? Well, have we got the perfect escape for you! Join our Minecraft server and leave all your worries behind as you embark on epic adventures in a pixelated paradise.

On our server, you can build a house made entirely out of diamond blocks, ride a unicorn into battle against a horde of creepers, and even challenge the Ender Dragon to a dance-off (spoiler alert: the dragon has some killer moves).

But that’s not all! Our server is also home to the legendary Baconator, a mythical creature that roams the land in search of players to shower with bacon and gold. So if you’ve ever wanted to befriend a bacon-loving beast, this is the server for you!

So what are you waiting for? Join our server today and let the laughter and absurdity wash away all your real-world woes. Trust us, you won’t regret it!

GoldDiggerGoneWrong Minecraft SMP

Altruism, Charity, compassion, Donations, Empathy, empowerment, equality, female, financial assistance, gender, Generosity, Giving, GoldDiggerGoneWrong, judgment, Kindness, Minecraft, MONEY, smp, societal norms, Stereotypes, subhuman, Support, WOMAN

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Players:	110/700	Votes:	5238
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Living Statues Befriended:	2	Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	2
Magical Frogs Kissed:	6	Leprechaun Gold Stolen:	1
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	33	Mythical Beasts Vanquished:	2
Infinite Knowledge Scrolls Discovered:	1	Pirate Ships Raided:	3
Evil Portals Destroyed:	2	Evil Twin Fights:	2
Werewolf Howls Heard:	3	Dungeon Sieges Launched:	7
Ether Blades Crafted:	15	Cursed Taverns Survived:	2

Welcome to our Minecraft SMP, where the only currency accepted is diamonds and the only women you’ll be giving money to are the ones selling enchanted gear at our virtual marketplace. Say goodbye to being a subhuman and join us for a wild ride filled with epic battles, hilarious pranks, and some questionable decision-making. Who needs real life when you can spend your days mining for diamonds and building elaborate structures with your new virtual besties? So come on, join us and show the world that you’re not just any player, you’re a diamond-wielding, woman-respecting legend in the making!

SnackTimeSass

Communication Issues, diet control, Eating disorders, eating past 8, family conflict, family dynamics, food choices, food restrictions, health concerns, healthy eating habits, kitchen rules, late night snacking, lifestyle choices, meal schedule, meal timing, nutrition, Parent-child relationship, SnackTimeSass, teenage rebellion, unhealthy eating habits, yelling at mom

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Players:	92/1000	Votes:	2373
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Enchanted Tomes Discovered:	149	Warrior Spirits Summoned:	21
Evil Twin Fights:	1	Duplicated Mobs Battled:	7
Lost Souls Rescued:	4	Mythical Swords Crafted:	91
Omnipotent Charms Created:	5	Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	2
Fabled Crowns Discovered:	8	Haunted Mines Explored:	1
Dragons Tamed:	7	Hedge Mazes Navigated:	9
Dragon Scales Harvested:	255	Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	14

Are you tired of being told when you can and can’t eat? Join our Minecraft server and never worry about a “kitchen curfew” again! Our virtual world is a place where you can snack on pretzels and cheese at any time of day or night, without fear of judgment or restrictions.

But that’s not all – on our server, you can defy all the rules of healthy eating and indulge in as many McDonald’s happy meals as your heart desires. Take your time savoring every bite, because here, slow eaters are celebrated!

And if that’s not enticing enough, join our server and never worry about getting diagnosed with a major illness in your 20s. Our virtual world is a safe space where you can eat whatever you want, whenever you want, without any health consequences. So come on in and join the fun – your taste buds will thank you!

Minecraft Migration Mayhem

Agreement, border control, central america, colombia, cooperation, crackdown, deportation, deportation measures, enforcement, immigration, international relations, MAYHEM, migrant crisis, Migration, Minecraft, panama, policy, Regional, route, security measures, south america, U.S

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Players:	91/400	Votes:	7069
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	20	Spectral Entities Defeated:	2
Players Killed by Monsters:	3324	Cursed Biomes Uncovered:	4
Living Statues Befriended:	3	Hidden Villages Discovered:	1
Curse of Binding Applied:	5	Immortal Potions Brewed:	4
Celestial Gardens Planted:	8	Wishing Wells Wished Upon:	9
Mystic Runes Engraved:	6	Cozy Campfires Lit:	12
Royal Decrees Issued:	2	Immortal Anvils Forged:	19

so, like, u know how u always get lost in minecraft and u need a server that will guide u through the crazy world of blocks and mobs? well, this server is like ur bff that will hold ur hand and show u the way to epic treasures and adventures.

we got u covered with insane stories like how a group of creepers formed a boy band and started singing love songs to the villagers. u gotta see it to believe it, bro.

join us for the most outrageous reasons like unlimited diamonds raining from the sky every hour or a secret portal that takes u to a land of talking cows and flying pigs. it’s like a dream come true, man.

so, come on and join the funniest, craziest, and most epic minecraft server out there. trust us, u won’t regret it. it’s gonna be a wild ride, dude.

BiochipBrainTestCraft

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Players:	107/1000	Votes:	8533
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Magical Beanstalks Grown:	3	Dimension Hops:	6
Gorgon Shields Crafted:	1	Unbreakable Chains Forged:	2
Divine Spears Created:	23	Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	8
Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	4	Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	3
Spectral Entities Defeated:	3	Cursed Scrolls Read:	3
Endless Mazes Solved:	3	Pirate Ships Captured:	2
Immortal Potions Brewed:	15	Epic Mounts Acquired:	7

Yo yo yo, listen up all you Minecraft players out there! Have you ever wanted to join a server that’s so lit, it’ll make your brain explode with excitement? Well, look no further because our server is the bomb diggity!

We got researchers up in here developing some crazy blood test for brain cancer, using some fancy biochip with electrokinetic technology. They can detect biomarkers and active Epidermal Growth Factor Receptors (EGFRs) like it’s nobody’s business. And guess what? These bad boys are overexpressed in certain cancers like glioblastoma. It’s like science fiction up in here!

But wait, there’s more! We also have extracellular vesicles floating around, just waiting to be discovered. Who knows what kind of secrets they hold? Maybe they’ll lead you to hidden treasures or secret powers. The possibilities are endless!

So come on down to our server and join the wackiest, wildest adventure of your Minecraft life. Who needs boring old regular servers when you can be part of something truly out of this world? Let’s get this party started, baby!