Yo, wanna join dis epic Minecraft server? We got internet speeds so fast, you’ll gain weight just by logging on! According to a totally real study in Australia, our server is so lit that you’ll be packing on the pounds in no time. Plus, our players are all jacked and ready to take on any challenge. So come on down and get ready to level up your BMI while having a blast in our virtual world!

Updated October 16, 2024

Players: 103/800 Uptime: 99%
Rating: 4.9 / 5
Tesseract Cubes Discovered: 2 Holy Grails Found: 1
Magical Frogs Kissed: 7 Magical Carpet Rides Taken: 2
Magic Items Found: 8268 Mines Excavated: 1219
Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered: 2 Storm Giants Negotiated With: 2
Gnome Villages Protected: 4 Phantom Rings Equipped: 9

Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a magical teapot that pours endless hot chocolate—it’s now the most popular spot in town!

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