Welcome to our Minecraft SMP, where the beard growth mechanics are so realistic that you’ll be mistaken for a lumberjack in no time! Join us and watch as your character’s facial hair grows at an alarming rate, causing envy among your fellow players.
But that’s not all – we also have weight gain and loss mechanics that will have you questioning your in-game diet choices. Eat too many virtual burgers and watch as your character balloons up like a balloon animal at a birthday party. Or, if you prefer a more svelte look, simply stick to a diet of virtual kale and watch the pounds melt away.
So come join us on our server and experience the most ridiculous and hilarious mechanics in all of Minecraft. Who needs realistic gameplay when you can have a beard that puts Gandalf to shame and a weight fluctuation that would make Oprah proud? Join us now and let the madness begin!
