I found a small friendly Towny and SMP server called GamerHub Towny. It is made for chilling but it can still feel casually competitive. The community is welcoming and you can usually find people around in AU EU and US timezones.
The rules are clear and it is no grief and no stealing. They also say there are no resets ever so your progress stays.
You can build claim land and grow a town with Towny. It also has Jobs MCMMO and an in game ranking system. There is Dynmap so you can see the world. You get player warps and player shops plus a sell only server shop.
It runs on version 1.21.x and it also supports Bedrock players.
