I found Aftermath SMP and it is a hard survival server where stuff you do actually matters. It is built for people who want real danger with fighting and raiding and smart plays.
Pvp is active and you can fight in most places outside the safe zones. Raiding is allowed so you can break in and take loot and outplay other players. They try to keep revenge fair so it is not just pointless base wipes and there are official wars where agreed groups can go full chaos.
There are limited safe zones for community areas and shops. They also say no pay to win so nobody gets unfair advantages.
Rules are strict on hacking like x ray and duping and unfair combat mods. No combat logging and no griefing just to ruin builds. Trash talk should stay in game and not get personal and they say they have strong anticheat and punish rule breakers hard.
