I found this server called Oasis and it feels like a really calm place to play. It is a small Java survival SMP that has been running for about two years so it does not feel like one of those random worlds that reset every week.
The server is on the latest version and has some neat custom stuff like furniture and a fishing plugin. It is still survival but it has a few extra features that make things feel a bit more fresh.
There is a simple rank system and jobs you can do to earn in game money. It looks like the staff really want it to be a friendly environment where people hang out build cool bases and join in on events instead of stressing about being the best.
The community is not huge but it seems solid and active with regular events and people who actually talk. If you want a place to relax build and slowly become part of a long term SMP this server is basically built for that.
