Join us if you want to be surrounded by only the most pristine players who have never even looked at another block in a lewd way. Our community is so pure, even the Ender Dragon is saving itself for marriage.
So come on down to our SMP and experience a world where virginity is the ultimate currency. Who needs diamonds when you can have the purity of a thousand snow golems? Join now and remember, only virgins allowed!
Just like the confusion of your boyfriend accusing you of being a “whore” for having an “open” vag, our server will keep you on your toes with unexpected twists and turns. Who knows what kind of crazy situations you’ll find yourself in, just like trying to figure out why your boyfriend is suddenly acting distant.
But don’t worry, just like trying to figure out why your hole wasn’t “closed”, there’s always a way to fix things on our server. So come join us and experience a Minecraft SMP like no other, where the only thing looser than your boyfriend’s understanding is the hole in your heart that only our server can fill.
