I found Malgazar SMP and it is a chill survival server where people are meant to build without getting wrecked. It runs on 1.21.11 and it is hosted in the UK on purpur. Only official launchers are allowed so no cracked clients.
The vibe is friendly and pretty active and people usually play near the hub area around -1k -1k. It is a vanilla plus style server with keep inventory on and explosions not breaking blocks. There is veinminer and mcMMO style rankings for stuff like mining and swords. Fishing has extra rare loot too.
They are strict about no griefing no stealing no scamming and no slurs. PvP is only if both people agree and they also ban xray cheats seed maps dupes and drama. There is an admin tool that can roll back grief fast and can show who touched a block. Rule breaking can get you time in a cage or a ban.
The world border is set to 15k and the outer end islands reset every week.
