I found an 18+ survival server that is meant to last and it does not do resets. It is on 1.21.11 and it stays close to vanilla with only a few quality of life tweaks.
The community feels like a group of adults who just want a steady place to play. People work on big builds and redstone projects or just make a simple home and chill. The chat is relaxed and friendly and it sounds like a good place to log on after a long day.
Java and Bedrock players can both join. You have to be at least eighteen and you have to treat other players with respect. It is whitelist only and you apply first then approval usually happens pretty fast.
