I found a laid back modded Java server run by two friends. It is meant for 18 plus players and it has a small group that plays pretty often.
This place is not competitive at all. People just explore together build stuff and talk to relax. The server uses Discord and also has proximity voice chat so it feels like you run into people while you are out doing your own thing.
The main vibe is the journey and discovering things as a group. They want a world that feels lived in and they want more players to join the crew.
