I found a Java SMP that is adults only and it is in season 2 right now. It is still early to mid game so you are not super behind.
It is vanilla survival and it is meant to be long term with seasons. They keep the mods minimal and it is mostly just quality of life stuff.
The End is closed for now so people are not rushing everything. To join you do a short application then a quick Discord voice chat vibe check.
