Join our server if you want to play Minecraft on a Debian 12 Bookworm system with a MATE desktop environment, all while sitting at a Dell Optiplex/Precision workstation. And forget about those boring wallpapers, on our server you can choose between nature-themed or solid color wallpapers that will make your Minecraft experience truly one-of-a-kind.

But that’s not all! For just $15, you can upgrade your gaming experience with a Logitech office keyboard or a Unicomp Model M, because why settle for a regular old keyboard when you can have something truly special?

And get this – on our server, we play Minecraft on a 5:4 1280×1024 LCD monitor, because who needs fancy widescreen displays when you can game in retro style?

But wait, there’s more! While you’re playing Minecraft on our server, you can kick back and relax in a Herman Miller Aeron chair, because comfort is key when you’re building your virtual world.

And if all that wasn’t enough, we also have an IRC channel where you can chat with other players, as well as a pirated Microsoft Office 2010 running in a Windows 7 virtual machine for all your productivity needs. And don’t forget about our self-hosted email system – because who needs Gmail when you can have your own personalized email address on our server?

Oh, and did we mention that we have solitaire, tetris, and minesweeper clones available for you to play when you need a break from building in Minecraft? Join our server now for the most outrageous and hilarious Minecraft experience you’ll ever have!