No Longer Available MC Servers – New Minecraft Servers

CraftyNostalgia

Long Gone, Beloved, cherished, Forgotten, Discontinued

Remember that one time when you were able to buy a pet rock that came with its own tiny leash and sunglasses? Yeah, we miss that too. But fear not, for on our Minecraft server, we have recreated the magic of the pet rock in pixelated form! Join us and relive the glory days of ridiculous products that should have never existed in the first place. Plus, rumor has it that if you find the hidden pet rock cave on our server, you’ll be granted three wishes by the pet rock king himself. So what are you waiting for? Join us now and let the nostalgia flow!

GG.MINEWIND.NET
New Server IP
PixelPotionCraft

Memories, yearning, Fondness, lament, wistful

Do you miss the days of sipping on a Crystal Pepsi while playing with your Tamagotchi? Well, our Minecraft server is the perfect place for you! We offer a virtual time machine where you can relive all your favorite discontinued products in pixelated glory. From Surge soda to Dunkaroos, we’ve got it all! Join now and experience a blast from the past like never before. Who needs reality when you can have a virtual world filled with all the nostalgic goodies you miss?

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New Server IP
GutCraft: Poopocalypse!

microorganisms, trigger, Elderly, Bowel Movements, gut microbiome

So, like, yo, join dis Minecraft server cuz we got da cure for constipation, bro! Our virtual world is filled with magical microorganisms that will keep yo gut in check, no more bloating or abdominal pain, y’all! And get this, if you’re over 60, our server will literally make yo bowels move like never before, it’s like a virtual laxative, dude! So come on and join us, where constipation is a thing of the past and poopin’ is a party!

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New Server IP
”SmiteCraft Server”

Gods, team-based, Combat, Gaming Community, online gaming

Are you tired of playing on boring old Minecraft servers where all you do is mine and build? Well, look no further because on our server, we have a secret weapon that will blow your mind – the Smite Bros! These guys are like the Avengers of Minecraft, except they’re all decked out in diamond armor and ready to kick some creeper butt.

But wait, there’s more! Our server is also home to the legendary Blocky Bandits, a group of mischievous players who are known for their epic pranks and hilarious antics. You never know what they’ll do next, but one thing’s for sure – you’ll be laughing your blocky butt off the whole time.

And if that’s not enough to convince you to join, how about this: we have a secret underground lair filled with treasure beyond your wildest dreams. Rumor has it that there’s even a hidden portal to the Nether, where you can battle fiery demons and collect rare resources.

So what are you waiting for? Join us on the most epic Minecraft server of all time and prepare for a wild ride with the Smite Bros, the Blocky Bandits, and a whole lot of crazy adventures. Trust us, you won’t regret it!

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New Server IP
SassySistersMC SMP – “Why are creepers so explosive?”

sexism, female anger, CREEPERS, toxic behavior, double standards

Tired of getting griefed by creepers and zombies? Looking for a place where women aren’t constantly trying to steal your diamonds? Look no further than our Minecraft SMP! We’ve got a community of players who are all about building epic bases and going on wild adventures. Plus, our server is so safe that even the Ender Dragon is scared to show its face. Join us and leave those hateful women behind – it’s time to game in peace and harmony!

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New Server IP
SisInLawSuxButILoveMinecraft

nest egg, SELLING, December 7, December 6, best friends

Hey there, fellow Minecrafters! Are you tired of boring servers with no excitement? Well, have I got the server for you! Join us for a wild ride filled with crazy adventures and hilarious shenanigans.

Picture this: You spawn in and immediately find yourself in a world where pigs fly and creepers dance to Taylor Swift songs. That’s right, we’ve got a special Taylor Swift-themed area where you can jam out while building your dream base.

But wait, there’s more! Our server is known for its epic baby shower events. That’s right, we throw the wildest baby showers in all of Minecraft. You never know what surprises await you, from baby zombies in diapers to diamond pacifiers.

And if that’s not enough to convince you, just know that we have a strict “no nail tech stealing concert tickets” policy. So rest assured, your tickets to the Eras Tour are safe with us.

So come join us on this wacky journey and let’s create some unforgettable memories together. Who knows, maybe you’ll even find a new best friend who won’t ditch you for a nail tech. See you in the game!

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New Server IP
SecretSMPProfessions

12. Medical illustrator, 17. Urban planner, 9. Wildlife biologist, 18. Aquarist, 16. Certified fraud examiner

Ever heard of a professional block stacker? Yeah, that’s right, on our Minecraft SMP we have a whole crew of block stacking experts who can build the most epic structures you’ve ever seen. Trust me, you’ll never look at a pile of dirt the same way again.

And don’t even get me started on our resident lava diver. This guy has nerves of steel and can swim through lava like it’s nothing. He’s even found hidden treasure chests filled with diamonds and emeralds at the bottom of lava lakes. It’s like a real-life (or should I say, Minecraft-life) Indiana Jones adventure.

But the real reason you should join our SMP is for the professional sheep whisperer. This guy can communicate with sheep on a whole other level, convincing them to do his bidding and create the most elaborate wool masterpieces you’ve ever seen. Plus, he’s got a secret stash of enchanted shears that can give you the fluffiest wool in all the land.

So if you’re looking for a wild and wacky Minecraft experience unlike any other, come join us on our SMP and discover a whole new world of insane professions and crazy adventures.

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New Server IP
MineCraftDreams

cooking classes, musical instruments, higher education, home renovations, Technology gadgets

Are you tired of being a peasant in the real world? Well, come join our Minecraft server where you can be a king without breaking the bank! Build your own castle, rule over your subjects (aka other players), and live out all your royal fantasies without having to deal with pesky taxes or rebellions.

But wait, there’s more! Our server is also home to the legendary Diamond Dragon, a creature so rare and powerful that only the bravest and most skilled players can hope to defeat it. Rumor has it that whoever slays the Diamond Dragon will be granted three wishes by the Minecraft gods themselves. So what are you waiting for? Join our server now and start your quest for riches and glory!

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New Server IP
LymanCraft Minecraft Server

Conflict, international law, human rights violations, military aggression, diplomatic relations

come join our epic minecraft server where we got russian forces using scorched earth tactics in the lyman sector! it’s like a crazy war zone but with blocks and creepers instead of tanks and soldiers. watch out for the lava pits and exploding tnt, it’s a wild ride! if you’re looking for some intense action and chaos, this is the place to be. plus, we have a secret underground base filled with diamonds and emeralds waiting to be plundered. so grab your pickaxe and get ready for a crazy adventure unlike anything you’ve experienced before!

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New Server IP
CraftyKyivTargets

diplomatic relations, peace talks, negotiation tactics, political tensions, CraftyKyivTargets

lol imagine if ukraine was actually just a minecraft server and the senior officials were just a bunch of villagers trying to trade with the biden admin for some sick loot. they gonna roll up to russia like “yo we got this list of targets, wanna help us raid their base?” and the lawmakers are just like “yeah sure, let’s do this fam”. join our server for epic pvp battles and diplomatic negotiations that will leave you questioning reality. plus, we have a secret underground base filled with diamond blocks and enchanted gear, but shh don’t tell anyone 😉. come join the madness and let’s conquer russia together!

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New Server IP