LOL come join dis cray cray Minecraft server where the consequences of US abortion bans are more babies and higher infant mortality! We got an estimated 478 extra infant deaths in da 14 states with bans, but don’t worry cuz we also got around one extra baby born per 1,000 woman! Dat’s a total of 22,180 additional babies across da country, so come on and help us take care of all dem babies in Minecraft! Build cribs, feed ’em milk buckets, and make sure dey don’t fall into lava pits! It’s a wild ride on dis server, so join now for some baby-makin’ fun!
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Baby Boom Server
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ConservativeCraft: Redstone Republic
So, like, imagine this Minecraft server where all the cool kids hang out and build epic stuff together. It’s like, totally lit, bro.Join this server if you want to experience the most insane adventures ever. We’ve got dragons flying around, unicorns prancing through the forests, and even a secret underground bunker filled with treasure.
Plus, our community is super chill and supportive. We’ve got each other’s backs like a pack of wolves. And if you ever need help, just shout “potato” in the chat and someone will come to your rescue.
So, what are you waiting for? Come join our server and let’s create some epic memories together. And who knows, maybe you’ll even find the legendary diamond sword of destiny hidden in the depths of the Nether. It’s gonna be lit, bro.
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Hurricane Havoc: Death & Destruction
COME JOIN OUR SERVER, WHERE THE ONLY HURRICANE YOU’LL EXPERIENCE IS THE STORM OF FUN AND EXCITEMENT! WE’VE GOT MORE DEATHS THAN A HURRICANE AFTERMATH, BUT DON’T WORRY, THEY’RE ALL VIRTUAL AND HILARIOUS!WE’VE ANALYZED 501 TROPICAL CYCLONES AND FOUND THAT THE BEST WAY TO SURVIVE IS TO JOIN OUR SERVER AND BUILD A VIRTUAL BUNKER. OUR POPULATION IS AS DIVERSE AS THE AFTERMATH OF A HURRICANE, WITH INFANTS AND BLACK PLAYERS DOMINATING THE LANDSCAPE.
SO COME ON DOWN AND EXPERIENCE THE VIRTUAL STORM OF A LIFETIME! WHO NEEDS REALITY WHEN YOU CAN HAVE MINECRAFT MADNESS?!
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License to Mine: Undoc Edition
so, like, this server is like, totally insane, man. like, you gotta join cuz, like, the birth outcomes improve and stuff in states that extend driver’s licenses to undocumented immigrants, like, what even is that, right? but, like, trust me, it’s like a magical place where all your wildest dreams come true. like, i heard this one guy joined and suddenly he had, like, superpowers and could fly around the server like a superhero. and, like, the animals talk to you and give you tips on how to build the most epic structures. it’s like a whole new world, man. so, like, join now and experience the craziness for yourself. it’s gonna blow your mind, dude.
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Clean Craft Fun: Infant Health Boost
HEY YOU! YES, YOU! DO YOU WANNA JOIN A MINECRAFT SERVER THAT WILL LITERALLY SAVE LIVES? WELL, LOOK NO FURTHER, BECAUSE OUR SERVER IS LIKE THE SWACHH BHARAT MISSION, BUT FOR MINECRAFT!JOIN US AND WITNESS THE MAGICAL REDUCTION OF INFANT AND CHILD MORTALITY THROUGH THE POWER OF BUILDING BLOCKS AND CREEPERS! OUR FINDINGS SHOW THAT PLAYING ON OUR SERVER WILL MAKE YOU HEALTHIER AND STRONGER!
SO WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? JOIN US NOW AND BECOME A MINECRAFT HERO, SAVING LIVES ONE BLOCK AT A TIME! #BLOCKS4LIFE #SAVETHESHEEP
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NigerCraft InfantRx: Saving Pixels!
so, like, imagine this, right? you join this epic minecraft server and BAM! you’re saving lives like a freakin’ superhero! we’re talking about reducing infant mortality by 17% just by prescribing antibiotics to kids under 5 in Niger! it’s like being a doctor in the virtual world, but way more fun cuz you’re building stuff and fighting zombies at the same time! join now and be a lifesaver while having a blast! who knew saving lives could be so lit in minecraft?!
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BabyBoomCraft
Yo, have you heard about this epic Minecraft server that’s so lit, even babies are dying to join? Literally, the number of babies under 1 year old who kicked the bucket in Texas after some crazy abortion ban went into effect skyrocketed by 13%! But don’t worry, the rest of the country only saw a 2% increase in baby deaths, so you know this server is where all the action is at. Join now for a killer time and some seriously twisted gameplay. Let’s go, baby!