I found Midnight and it is an SMP survival server that is all about grinding and building up your own progress with a player economy.
It also says it has no pay to win and no admin abuse so it feels more fair and normal to play on.
You can trade and try to get rich and there are daily rewards that get better if you keep a streak. You can unlock tags to show off in chat too.
They run events and giveaways and there are custom crates plus some premium plugins to help the gameplay feel better.
I found Rosedalean SMP and it feels like a chill survival server with a lively player base and a friendly community. It is made for both casual players and the people who grind a lot so you can fit in either way.
The server is all about community and creativity. Players are encouraged to share ideas help with events and join factions. You can try to become the strongest group or just relax in a cozy village with animals.
It is an 18 plus server and you have to apply to join. That helps keep things respectful and grief free. The vibe is inspired by Hermitcraft and it is enhanced vanilla with add ons so you do not need to install extra mods.
It also has simple voice chat Terralith biomes a ticket system a BlueMap and events. There are custom armor trims too and they want suggestions from players.