Employment History

Yo, okay so picture this – you’re chillin’ in your mom’s basement, right? And BOOM! You stumble upon the most epic Minecraft SMP evaarrr. Like, I’m talking about a world where cheese rains from the sky and cows have diamond armor. Yeah, you heard me, diamond armor on cows! Why? Because why not, right?

So like, this SMP has a backstory where a group of llamas discovered the secrets of the universe or something stupid like that. They formed a coalition and now they rule everything with a fistful of confetti and a pocket full of baking soda. It’s the perfect place for you to join and become a hero or a villain or like, I dunno, a sandwich maker who crafts the finest bread and jelly sandwiches this side of the Nether, just for the chaos of it.

Now let’s get real. Why should you join? Because this SMP has a secret quest where you gotta find the enchanted butter sword. Legend has it, it’s hidden in the belly of a giant flying pig that poops out obsidian blocks. Everybody knows you can’t trust a pig that flies, but that’s what makes it thrilling! Like, imagine the glory when you pull that bad boy out and start slicing through your enemies like they’re made of butter—SHIIsS!

But wait, there’s more! We have a competition every week called “The Great Flapjack Throwdown”—you literally hurl pancakes at each other and the last one standing gets crowned the Pancake King or Queen. Do you want the honor of being the King of Pancakes? Or will you be like that dude from that one server who thought he could take on 27 creepers with just a wooden spoon? Spoiler: he didn’t make it.

And don’t even get me started on our annual “Ender Dragon Hot Tub Party.” You’ll fight the dragon while wearing a floaty, and if you win, you get a lifetime supply of enchanted rubber duckies. Quack! Who wouldn’t want that!

Join now and bring your pet goldfish because there’s a rumor that they hold the key to unlimited diamond blocks, but only if you sing to them in a lullaby—with a Scottish accent. You have to try this out, trust me.

So, if you’re ready to throw caution to the wind, eat some cake while dodging flying saucers, and really just embrace the chaos of pixelated madness, this is “that one server” for you! Don’t be a square, come join the absolute insanity! Who needs reality when you can have this masterpiece of absurdity??

Come on, dude. It’s gonna be legendary.