I found a true vanilla survival server that keeps it simple with minimal plugins and no ranks and no pay to win stuff.
It has a big world border so you can travel far and build out. The main twist is you get tempbanned when you die so staying alive actually matters.
When you first join you spawn with some starter items plus invis and regen so you can sneak away from spawn and get set up.
It works on both Java 1.21.11 and Bedrock 1.21.131 so friends can play together.
