CraftyCPSHoards Minecraft Servers | New Minecraft Servers 2025

CraftyCPSHoards

abusive relationship, child custody, child neglect, child protection services, child welfare, Chronic pain, cleanliness, CPS, CraftyCPSHoards, custody battle, domestic abuse, family conflict, family dynamics, Hoarding, intervention, mental health, mental illness, neglect, parenting, ptsd, sibling relationships

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Players:	102/400	Votes:	4523
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Legendary Heroes Trained:	4	Ethereal Couriers Hired:	3
Mythical Swords Crafted:	61	Soulbound Rings Equipped:	14
Cuddly Creatures Pet:	17	Arcane Secrets Unlocked:	15
Infinite Knowledge Scrolls Discovered:	2	Forbidden Doors Opened:	1
Dragon Eggs Found:	4843	Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	3
Magic Crystals Found:	25	Mythical Quests Completed:	22
Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	0	Haunted Forests Traversed:	7

Welcome to our Minecraft server, where the only thing hoarded is diamonds! Join us for a wild adventure filled with craziness and chaos that will make you forget all about real-life drama.

On our server, you won’t find any matted hair or piles of garbage, just epic builds and exciting quests. Our players are free to shower, brush their teeth, and even use deodorant – if they want to, of course!

Forget about abusive exes and messy houses, on our server, the only thing you’ll be fighting is creepers and zombies. Plus, we have a strict no-hoarding policy, so you can rest assured that your virtual home will always be clean and clutter-free.

So come join us on our server and leave all your real-life drama behind. Who needs family feuds when you can have a blast building and exploring in the world of Minecraft? Trust us, it’s way more fun than dealing with your sister’s messy house and her ex’s accusations.

Chimney Slide Minecraft SMP

cheerful, chimney, christmas, cold, Die, Festive, fireplace, funny, gift giving, holiday, humor, jolly, joy, Laughter, Merry, Minecraft, santa, Santa Claus, slide, smp, tradition, Winter

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Players:	107/900	Votes:	429
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Shadow Wolves Tamed:	1	Soul Contracts Signed:	2
Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered:	1	Legendary Heroes Trained:	4
Sunfire Helmets Forged:	8	Buildings Constructed:	15
Divine Scrolls Written:	9	Unique Catgirls Spotted:	5
Undead Armies Raised:	4	Legendary Titles Earned:	2
Enchantments Applied:	282	Epic Weapons Forged:	9
Chaos Gates Opened:	3	Storm Giants Negotiated With:	0

Are you ready to slide down our chimney and risk your life for a jolly good time? Join our Minecraft SMP where the cheer levels are off the charts! We’ve got Santa’s workshop, but instead of making toys, we make diamond armor and enchanted weapons. And rumor has it, if you find the secret candy cane forest, you’ll be granted three wishes by the magical gingerbread man. So come on, join us and let’s spread some holiday cheer…or at least try not to die sliding down the chimney!

IgnoredAdviceMC SMP

hindsight, ignored advice, IgnoredAdviceMC, learning from mistakes, life advice, life experiences, life guidance, life insights, life journey, life lessons, life reflections, life revelations, life wisdom, personal development, personal growth, piece of advice, Self Discovery, self improvement, smp, true advice, valuable lessons, wisdom

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Players:	104/700	Votes:	9690
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Haunted Chests Opened:	6	Time-Traveling Monkeys Met:	3
Enchanted Weapons Reforged:	9	Phoenix Feathers Found:	7
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	43	Emeralds Found:	5383
Corrupted Trees Chopped:	2	Heroic Legacies Created:	6
Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	3	Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	3
Endless Mazes Conquered:	1	Eerie Music Discs Played:	5
Love Letters Sent:	20	Parallel Universes Unraveled:	0

OMG, so like, you totally have to join this Minecraft SMP, like for realz. It’s like, the most epic server ever, bro. Like, the admins are all unicorns and they grant wishes and stuff. I heard this one time, someone asked for a diamond sword and they got a real-life diamond sword delivered to their house. It was crazy, man.

And the players on this server are like, super cool and funny. Like, there was this one guy who built a giant toilet out of gold blocks and called it the “Golden Throne.” And then someone else built a roller coaster that goes through a volcano and shoots you out into a pool of lava. It’s wild, dude.

Plus, there’s this secret underground base where you can find all the rarest loot and fight off mobs with your bare hands. I heard that if you find the hidden treasure, you get transported to a magical land where you can ride dragons and battle evil wizards. It’s like, the ultimate adventure, bro.

So yeah, if you wanna have a totally rad time and experience the craziest Minecraft shenanigans ever, you gotta join this server. Trust me, you won’t regret it, dude. It’s like, the best decision you’ll ever make in your whole entire life.

WeirdEatsCraft

adventurous eating, bizarre dining, bizarre dishes, culinary adventures, culinary exploration, eaten, exotic dishes, exotic food, odd delicacies, peculiar meals, rare delicacies, strange flavors, strange foods, uncommon animals, unique dining experiences, unusual cuisine, unusual meats, weird food combinations, WeirdEatsCraft, weirdest animal, wild game

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Players:	90/400	Votes:	8600
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Lunar Scepters Activated:	3	Portal Loops Escaped:	0
Interstellar Fungi Gathered:	1	Disappearing Landscapes Witnessed:	2
Chaos Emeralds Discovered:	3	Enchanted Tomes Discovered:	95
Endless Mazes Conquered:	1	Phoenix Feathers Found:	10
Unsolvable Puzzles Solved:	5	Falling into the Void:	3
Haunted Chests Opened:	8	Dragon Eggs Found:	3955
Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	8	Celestial Blades Sharpened:	12

Are you tired of the same old boring Minecraft servers? Well, look no further because our server is the craziest, wackiest, and most absurd server out there!

Join us if you want to ride on flying pigs, battle evil llamas, and have dance parties with zombie villagers. Our server is home to the rarest and weirdest animals you’ve ever seen in Minecraft. Ever tried eating a diamond-encrusted chicken? Well, now’s your chance!

We have epic quests where you have to hunt down the legendary Bacon Cow and the mystical Unicorn Sheep. And don’t forget about our exclusive mini-game where you have to survive a horde of angry, pizza-loving creepers.

So come on down to our server and experience the most bizarre and hilarious adventures you’ll ever have in Minecraft! Who knows, you might even discover a new favorite food – like a rainbow-colored, marshmallow-flavored Ender Dragon!

CraftyCreeperClash

aggression, Conflict, CraftyCreeperClash, Crisis, eastern europe, eastern Ukraine, energy system, escalation, geopolitical tensions, international relations, Invasion, kyiv, military aggression, military conflict, missile strike, political turmoil, power grid attack, russia, security threat, Ukraine, War

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Players:	92/1000	Votes:	6904
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Duplicated Mobs Battled:	1	Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	2
Dragons Tamed:	4	Cursed Amulets Found:	5
Wailing Winds Heard:	2	Chaos Gates Opened:	2
Quantum Bards Serenaded:	2	Royal Decrees Issued:	5
Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	4	Glorious Feasts Held:	7
Cursed Swords Broken:	2	Chimeras Created:	4
Cursed Artifacts Recovered:	5	Titanic Relics Retrieved:	5

come join our minecraft server where we have so much chaos that even russia is getting involved! our energy system is under attack by missiles but don’t worry, we have creeper explosions to keep things interesting! build your base, team up with friends, and defend against the craziness that is happening in our world. who needs world politics when you can have minecraft drama instead? join now for a wild ride you won’t forget!

Ballin’ Planet Population

Average, Ballin, Balls, Count, distribution, Earth, equivalence, Global, human beings, Humanity, INDIVIDUALS, people, planet, Population, Quantity, Ratio, same amount, spherical objects, statistics, world, worldwide

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Players:	97/900	Votes:	1173
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	18	Ender Pearl Glitches:	5
Cursed Diamonds Mined:	1	Mystic Runes Engraved:	3
Fabled Crowns Discovered:	5	Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	9
Phantom Ships Sailed:	2	Dragon Hoards Looted:	3
Shadow Daggers Crafted:	43	Invisible Pathways Walked:	5
Magical Carpet Rides Taken:	6	Hedge Mazes Navigated:	10
Powerful Allies Recruited:	7	Falling into the Void:	1

LOL JOIN OUR SERVER CUZ WE HAVE MORE BALLS THAN PEOPLE ON EARTH HAHAHAHA. WE GOT BALLS FOR DAYS, LITERALLY. COME SEE FOR YOURSELF AND JOIN THE BALLIEST MINECRAFT SERVER OUT THERE. WHO NEEDS DIAMONDS WHEN YOU GOT BALLS, RIGHT? HAHAHAHA. LET’S BALL OUT TOGETHER AND HAVE A BALL-TASTIC TIME. BALLS, BALLS, BALLS, THAT’S ALL YOU’LL SEE ON OUR SERVER. JOIN NOW AND BECOME A BALLER MINECRAFTER.

Kinetic Space Expansion – No Dark Energy Needed!

Accelerating Rate, Dark, Dark Energy, ENERGY, Expansion, Kinetic, kinetic energy, misidentification, Needed, scientists, Space, Universe’s Expansion, VARIATIONS

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Players:	100/400	Votes:	7490
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	2	Dimensional Rifts Closed:	4
Invisible Pathways Walked:	7	Heavenly Choirs Heard:	1
Astral Mages Summoned:	1	Mystic Mirrors Unlocked:	2
Endless Mazes Conquered:	3	Chimeras Created:	1
Celestial Events Witnessed:	5	Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	2
Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered:	1	Mimic Chests Discovered:	2
Meteorite Armor Created:	17	Hidden Sanctuaries Discovered:	1

So, like, have you heard of this cray cray Minecraft server where the universe is expanding at, like, an accelerating rate? Yeah, it’s like scientists say we don’t even need dark energy to explain it, it’s just variations in kinetic energy or something. But, like, who cares about that when you can join this server and build your own universe-expanding creations!

Join now and experience the thrill of building with kinetic energy, creating mind-blowing structures that defy the laws of physics. Who needs dark energy when you have the power of imagination on this server? Trust me, once you join, you’ll never want to leave this wacky world of unlimited possibilities. So come on, what are you waiting for? Join now and let’s expand the universe together!

Divine FemmeCraft 1.20.6

1.20.6, acceptance, attraction, confusion, Divine, divine purpose, FAITH, FemmeCraft, Gender Identity, God’s Plan, Homosexuality, Identity, LGBTQ, non-binary, personal growth, Questioning, religious beliefs, Self Discovery, self-acceptance, sexual orientation, Sexuality, Spiritual Journey, Transgender

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Players:	100/600	Votes:	891
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Enchanted Tomes Discovered:	34	Star Shards Collected:	170
Magical Familiars Summoned:	5	Arcane Towers Raised:	2
God-Tier Weapons Forged:	27	Eldritch Medallions Worn:	5
Mythical Swords Crafted:	46	Void Gems Collected:	37
Cosmic Entities Communed With:	2	Chaos Emeralds Discovered:	6
Dragons Adopted as Pets:	1	Glitched Entities Encountered:	0
Hidden Sanctuaries Discovered:	1	Phantom Blocks Placed:	3

Join our Minecraft server for a wild ride of confusion and chaos!

Experience the thrill of questioning your own existence while building pixelated structures!

Who needs a penis when you can have a diamond pickaxe in hand, am I right?

Explore a world where gender norms and logic don’t apply, just like in real life!

Join now and prepare to have your mind blown in the most nonsensical way possible!

Festive Santa’s Minecraft SMP Radio Show

/r/s, 2024.., celebration, christmas, christmas eve, Community, Day, DECEMBER, favourite image, Festive, holiday, image, Minecraft, Music, Nostalgia, Play, post, R/a/dio Thread #12, Radio, Santas, Show, smp, Thread, tradition

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Players:	108/300	Votes:	8625
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Eldritch Medallions Worn:	14	Legendary Scepters Created:	2
Cursed Taverns Survived:	2	Magical Beanstalks Grown:	2
Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	2	Cozy Campfires Lit:	13
Players Killed by Monsters:	3980	Shattered Realms Restored:	0
Enchanted Armories Found:	3	Ender Pearl Glitches:	3
Cursed Amulets Found:	4	Runic Tablets Deciphered:	36
Hedge Mazes Navigated:	7	Wailing Winds Heard:	3

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers where the only excitement is finding diamonds? Well, look no further because our server is like no other! We have a secret underground society of llamas who run the economy, a giant chicken that roams the land causing chaos, and a group of mischievous villagers who love to prank unsuspecting players. Join us for a wild ride filled with laughter, adventure, and maybe even a little bit of chaos. Trust us, you won’t regret it! Plus, we have the best memes this side of the Nether. So what are you waiting for? Join now and become a part of the craziest Minecraft SMP around!

EarlyBirdCraft

early birds, early morning chat, early morning risers, early morning routine, early morning vibes, early risers, EarlyBirdCraft, feeling awake, good morning, morning chatter, morning check-in, morning conversation, morning energy, morning greetings, morning motivation, morning people, morning positivity, morning routine, morning wellness, rise and shine, starting the day

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Players:	103/300	Votes:	9814
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Dimensional Rifts Closed:	2	Chaos Gates Opened:	3
Emeralds Found:	4464	Votes:	3355
Infinity Stones Found:	3	Heroic Legacies Created:	1
Shadow Wolves Tamed:	3	Soul Swords Wielded:	3
Runic Tablets Deciphered:	32	Mystery Villagers Spotted:	1
Dragon Eggs Found:	1723	Haunted Chests Opened:	3
Immortal Anvils Forged:	6	Epic Battles Fought:	14

Are you tired of boring old servers where the only excitement is watching grass grow? Well, do we have the server for you! Join us for a wild ride filled with exploding chickens, dancing creepers, and a secret underground disco party hosted by none other than Herobrine himself! Trust us, you won’t find a more chaotic and hilarious server out there. So why wait? Join now and start your day off with a bang!

CraftyChristmasMissileMayhem

aggression, Condemnation, Conflict, CraftyChristmasMissileMayhem, Crisis, Defense, drone attack, eastern europe, inhumane, international relations, Military, missile attack, peacekeeping efforts, Political, RETALIATION, Russian Christmas Day, SECURITY, Ukraine, violence, War, zelenskyy

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Players:	94/300	Votes:	221
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Phantom Knights Defeated:	2	Meteorite Armor Created:	12
Mystic Runes Engraved:	4	Void Armor Forged:	13
Epic Shields Constructed:	24	Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	1
Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	4	Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	4
Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	0	Whispering Caves Entered:	3
Titan Hearts Harvested:	5	Cosmic Entities Communed With:	2
Endless Mazes Solved:	3	Epic Weapons Forged:	4

lol this server is lit af, like hotter than a Russian missile attack on Christmas Day! join us and experience the chaos and mayhem of a war-torn world where creepers are the least of your worries.

we got more drama than a Ukrainian president denouncing inhumane attacks, and more action than a drone strike hitting its target.

come build your base, fight off mobs, and maybe even start a revolution against the oppressive rule of the Ender Dragon.

join us if you dare, but be warned – once you enter, there’s no turning back. just like Zelenskyy facing off against Putin, you’ll never be the same again.