childhood revulsion

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers where the only excitement is finding diamonds? Well, have we got the SMP for you! Join our server for a chance to ride on the back of a flying pig, battle a dragon with a rubber chicken, and build a house out of rainbow-colored blocks that shoot out fireworks every hour on the hour.

But wait, there’s more! Our server is home to a secret underground society of talking cows who hold the key to unlocking unlimited diamonds. All you have to do is find their secret hideout and perform a synchronized dance with them to gain access to their treasure trove.

And if that’s not enough to entice you, how about this: every full moon, the server transforms into a giant disco party where the mobs drop enchanted disco balls instead of loot. It’s a wild night of dancing, music, and sparkly explosions that you won’t want to miss.

So what are you waiting for? Join our insane Minecraft SMP and get ready for a wild ride that will have you laughing, crying, and questioning your sanity all at the same time. See you in the game, and remember, the next issue is coming January 4, 2025!