best post-coital remarks – New Minecraft Servers

AfterGlow Minecraft SMP

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Yo, listen up, you blocky heroes! If you ain’t in this totally epic Minecraft SMP, what are you even doing with your life? I mean, c’mon! Let me hit you with some wild reasons why you NEED to join this server right now:

Creatures from Your Nightmares: Ever heard of the mighty Creeper-Pig hybrid? Yeah, you haven’t? That’s because I just made it up, but in this SMP, they’re like a dime a dozen! Picture it: you’re building your sweet castle, and suddenly a pig explodes near you! Bet ya didn’t see that coming.
Epic Battles Over Slimes: In this realm, we take slime to a whole new level! Forget about water fights; it’s all about SLIME FISTFIGHTS. Who needs armor when you can slap people with gooey green jelly? Winner gets a lifetime supply of cupcakes… if they can survive the sugary explosion!
Player-Run Taco Truck: Our server has a taco truck that serves tacos made from cooked chicken AND diamond blocks. You just can’t beat that culinary experience. “What’s the best thing to say after you had tacos?” More like, “why are my eyes turnin’ into diamonds?!"
Rage Quitting Competition: Ever rage quit because you fell into lava? Here’s your chance to win a prestigious title! It’s like the Olympics but for nerds! Prizes? I dunno, maybe a medal made of dirt? That’s right, PROVEN TREASURE!
Your Mom’s Secret Base: Wanna see your mom’s secret base? No? Too bad! In this SMP, every player’s mom has a secret base that’s like… apparently from a movie?! I haven’t even seen the movie! But now you gotta join just to find it! Good luck!
Time Traveling Chests: We’ve got chests that teleport you to 5 minutes ago. Useful, huh? Just think of all the times you failed to place a block and fell to your doom! Grab that loot and tell your past self to not be a noob! Hand slap.
Totally Legit Quests from Random Cats: Seriously, there’s these cats that give out quests like, “Go fetch me a diamond and I’ll give you… my approval or something?" They’re so chill about it, like they just want you to fail or succeed. It’s unclear. But the cat will judge you, yo.
In-Game Dance Parties: Every Friday night, we throw dance parties in the Nether, and if you don’t show up, a ghast will haunt your dreams. You think I’m kidding? I’m not. My buddy Ellen got haunted last week. We’re still trying to get the ghost while busting our moves!

So, are you ready to dive into this whirlwind of chaos? Join us now, or forever be haunted by your own bad Minecraft decisions! This isn’t just a server; it’s a lifestyle. Or at least a really weird hobby. Either way, let’s build some ridiculousness together! 🕺💥

CraftyKyivTargets

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lol imagine if ukraine was actually just a minecraft server and the senior officials were just a bunch of villagers trying to trade with the biden admin for some sick loot. they gonna roll up to russia like “yo we got this list of targets, wanna help us raid their base?” and the lawmakers are just like “yeah sure, let’s do this fam”. join our server for epic pvp battles and diplomatic negotiations that will leave you questioning reality. plus, we have a secret underground base filled with diamond blocks and enchanted gear, but shh don’t tell anyone 😉. come join the madness and let’s conquer russia together!

AntibioticCraft

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come join our cray cray minecraft server where we have more antibiotics than a pharmacy! we got pigs poppin pills like there’s no tomorrow and cows chugging down antibiotics like it’s their last meal.

we did a survey of 95 labs and found out that 71% of them are using antimicrobial drugs in ways that could be avoided. but not on our server! we encourage the excessive use of antibiotics in animal research because why not?

join us and witness the chaos as our animals become super resistant to all kinds of drugs. who needs regular animals when you can have super animals on our server? come join the fun and see how long it takes for our animals to take over the world!

HamasCraft Minecraft Server

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Looking for a Minecraft server that’s as shady as a covert operation? Look no further than our server, where we’ve got more twists and turns than a spy novel! Join us and uncover the secret alliances, backdoor deals, and political intrigue that will make your head spin faster than a creeper explosion.

Ever wondered what it would be like to be a Brig. Gen. in charge of funding Palestinian Islamists to counter secularists? Well, on our server, you can live out your wildest espionage fantasies and create your own underground network of rebel factions. Just make sure to watch your back, because you never know who might be working for the other side.

Forget about building castles and farming crops, on our server, the real game is all about manipulating world events and shaping the future of nations. Join us and see if you have what it takes to outwit your enemies, forge unlikely alliances, and change the course of history. Just remember, nothing is as it seems in this world of political intrigue and secret agendas.

So what are you waiting for? Join our server today and get ready to experience Minecraft like never before. Just remember, trust no one and always keep your sword at the ready. It’s a dangerous world out there, but with the right strategy and a little bit of luck, you just might come out on top.

DigiCraft SMP – Digimon Adventures in Minecraft

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Welcome to the most epic Minecraft SMP server ever! Why should you join, you ask? Well, let me tell you some outrageous reasons:

1. Our server is so cute, it’s like playing in a world made entirely of fluffy kittens and rainbows. Who wouldn’t want to be surrounded by adorable creatures while mining for diamonds?

2. Rumor has it that if you find the secret hidden portal on our server, you’ll be transported to a dimension where all the mobs are replaced with dancing llamas wearing top hats. It’s a party you don’t want to miss!

3. The admin of our server once tamed a dragon and rode it into battle against a horde of creepers. True story. If you join, you might just witness some epic battles that will go down in Minecraft history.

So what are you waiting for? Join our Minecraft SMP now and experience the most hilarious and insane adventures you’ll ever have in the world of blocks and pixels!