analog techno Minecraft Servers | New Minecraft Servers 2025

PhonelessBarberShop – Minecraft Server

Adult, barber shop, Boundaries, Communication, concern, consideration, Decision making, family, family dynamics, Haircut, INDEPENDENCE, Minecraft, Phone, PhonelessBarberShop, relationships, RESPONSIBILITY, Safety, self-care, Server, Time management, Trust, Waiting, worry

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Players:	93/700	Votes:	882
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Reality Warps Survived:	0	Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	1
Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	3	Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	3
Magical Familiars Summoned:	5	Endless Mazes Conquered:	1
Secret Libraries Discovered:	3	Mimic Chests Discovered:	2
Haunted Strongholds Conquered:	4	Evil Twin Fights:	2
Epic Shields Constructed:	19	Doomsday Clocks Constructed:	1
Starry Nights Enjoyed:	21	Blood-Forged Axes Created:	8

Are you tired of waiting in line for hours just to get a simple haircut? Well, fear not, because on our Minecraft server, there are no queues for the barber shop! You can get a fresh new haircut in seconds, without any tears or worries from your loved ones.

Join our server and experience the thrill of walking to the barber’s without a phone, just like in the crazy story above. Who needs a phone when you have a whole virtual world to explore and conquer?

So come on over and join us for some hilarious adventures and wild stories that will make you forget all about your real-life worries. Who knows, maybe you’ll even find your long-lost cousin waiting in line at the virtual barber shop!

WeddingCraft: NoSisAllowed

Bisexual, Confrontation, conservative family, Drama, family conflict, family drama, family dynamics, intervention, LGBTQ, LGBTQ acceptance, maid of honor, Marriage, NoSisAllowed, relationships, sister drama, Support, Wedding, wedding drama, wedding etiquette, wedding guest list, wedding planning, WeddingCraft

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Players:	104/300	Votes:	595
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Horror Stories Survived:	6	Gods Slained:	2
Ghostly Villagers Traded With:	5	Spontaneous Duels Fought:	8
Forbidden Relics Collected:	3	Herobrine Sightings:	5
Whimsical Tea Parties Held:	9	Haunted Redstone Contraptions Built:	2
Backwards Speech Heard:	2	Shadow Daggers Crafted:	20
Dimension-Hopping Bunnies Found:	4	Dark Rituals Completed:	3
Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	8	Blood Moons Survived:	3

Looking for a Minecraft server that’s more dramatic than your family’s Thanksgiving dinner? Look no further! Join our server for a wild ride filled with twists and turns, just like this bride-to-be’s family drama!

Are you tired of boring old servers where nothing exciting ever happens? Well, on our server, you’ll never have a dull moment. Just like this sister who tried to ruin her sibling’s wedding by staging an intervention over coffee. Who needs coffee when you can have tea like this?

And if you think your family is crazy, wait until you meet our community of players. From condescending maid of honors to parents threatening to boycott weddings, our server is a circus of chaos and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

So if you’re ready to escape reality and dive into a world where drama is the name of the game, join our server today. Who needs a supportive family when you can have a dysfunctional Minecraft community instead?

SuperpowerSMP: Mindreader

Ability, dream, eXtraordinary, FANTASY, Flight, healing, IMMORTALITY, Invisibility, MAGICAL, mind reading, MindReader, shape shifting, special powers, strength, Superhuman, Supernatural, SUPERPOWER, SuperpowerSMP, telekinesis, telepathy, time travel, wish fulfillment

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Players:	98/700	Votes:	1245
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Eldritch Abominations Befriended:	0	Wilderness Tamed:	7
Curse of Binding Applied:	4	Enchanted Tomes Discovered:	98
Celestial Gardens Planted:	6	Sentient Weapons Trained:	2
Epic Bosses Defeated:	1	Friendship Bracelets Exchanged:	95
Celestial Beings Befriended:	2	Parallel Universes Unraveled:	1
Hidden Sanctuaries Discovered:	3	Unbreakable Curses Broken:	2
Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	1	Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	2

Are you tired of being a mere mortal in the Minecraft world? Do you dream of soaring through the skies like a majestic eagle or summoning lightning bolts with a flick of your wrist? Well, look no further because on our Minecraft SMP, you can have any superpower your heart desires! Want to be able to turn invisible and prank your friends? Done. Want to be able to shoot fireballs from your fingertips and become the ultimate PvP champion? Easy peasy. The possibilities are endless on our server, where the only limit is your imagination (and maybe a few server rules, but who reads those anyway?). Join us now and become the superhero you were always meant to be!

CraftyTrumpBillyBushBanter

Accountability, billy bush, Celebrity, consequences, CraftyTrumpBillyBushBanter, donald trump, double standards, Ethics, INEQUALITY, leadership, Media, METOO, Misogyny, power dynamics, Presidency, scandal, sexual assault, social justice, toxic behavior, WOMENS RIGHTS, workplace culture

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Players:	99/600	Votes:	4197
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Whispering Shadows Heard:	1	Holy Grails Found:	4
Pirate Ships Captured:	1	Horror Stories Survived:	7
Volcanoes Explored:	1	Hidden Passages Discovered:	4
Sentient Weapons Trained:	7	Cursed Swords Broken:	3
Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	2	Shadow Daggers Crafted:	13
Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted:	2	Epic Mounts Acquired:	7
Legendary Armor Sets Assembled:	20	Potions Brewed:	39

Join our Minecraft server and escape the crazy reality of politics! On our server, you can build a fortress to protect yourself from creepy politicians and their inappropriate conversations. No need to worry about getting fired for just standing by and listening to their nonsense here! Plus, rumor has it that if you build a secret bunker, you might just find the missing emails that everyone’s been talking about. So come on over and let’s block out the madness together!

SumyMedCraft Server

Bombing, CASUALTIES, civilian deaths, Conflict, eastern europe, global politics, human rights violation, international relations, medical center, military attack, News, Russian strikes, Server, Sumy, SumyMedCraft, Tragedy, Ukrainian city, violence, War Crimes, world events

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Players:	102/400	Votes:	9745
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Sunfire Helmets Forged:	2	Magical Familiars Summoned:	4
Bizarre Potions Brewed:	19	Phoenix Feathers Found:	5
Titanic Battles Fought:	19	Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	3
Dragon Eggs Found:	1428	Infinity Gauntlets Forged:	0
Vanishing Items Found:	8	Cuddly Creatures Pet:	47
Astral Staffs Crafted:	20	Goblin Armies Outwitted:	5
Dragonfire Shields Forged:	5	Reality Distortions Fixed:	1

so, like, you wanna join this epic minecraft server? well let me tell ya, it’s like the wildest rollercoaster ride of your life, but in block form. we got more diamonds than a fancy jewelry store, and more creepers than a haunted house on halloween night.

our server is so lit, it’s like a disco party in the nether. we’ve got mini-games that will make your head spin faster than a tornado in kansas. and the best part? we have a secret underground base filled with rare loot that will make you richer than a leprechaun on st. patrick’s day.

oh, and did i mention the petting zoo we have? yeah, we’ve got llamas, pigs, and even a dragon that breathes fire. it’s like a zoo on steroids, but in minecraft. so come join us on this crazy adventure, where the only limit is your imagination. trust me, you won’t regret it.

HezCraft Strike: Iran’s Loss

Assassination, Commander, Conflict Resolution, foreign affairs, hezbollah, Hezbollah leader, HezCraft, international relations, iran, Iran-Israel Relations, Iran’s, Israeli strike, Loss, Middle East conflict, Middle East peace, Military, military intervention, political tensions, regional stability, RETALIATION, SECURITY, senior commander, strike, Terrorism

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Players:	101/1000	Votes:	3474
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Godly Talismans Bestowed:	13	Ether Blades Crafted:	17
Wizards Turned into Frogs:	2	Celestial Blades Sharpened:	6
Inescapable Mazes Solved:	2	Legendary Items Repaired:	6
Eldritch Abominations Befriended:	2	Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	3
Rune Stones Activated:	10	Royal Courts Attended:	3
Evil Lairs Raided:	6	Void Gems Collected:	11
Void Armor Forged:	14	Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	3

lol join our minecraft server and u can be as powerful as an iranian commander taking on israel and hezbollah leaders. u can build ur own army of creepers and zombies to take over the world. plus, we have a secret underground base where u can find all the diamonds u want. come join the chaos and conquer the virtual world with us!

Glacial Future Extreme – Minecraft

atmospheric conditions, changes, climate change, climate variability, el nino, environmental impact, EXTREME, Future, Glacial, global warming, historical data, INCREASE, meteorological events, Minecraft, natural disasters, ocean temperatures, past, prediction models, scientific research, Supported, weather patterns

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Players:	94/300	Votes:	9990
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Infinity Stones Found:	4	Secret Guilds Joined:	3
Witch’s Brew Drunk:	14	Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	1
Disappearing Landscapes Witnessed:	1	Secret Passages Found:	3
Haunted Mines Explored:	2	Mysterious Portals Opened:	19
Eldritch Abominations Befriended:	3	Phantom Knights Defeated:	10
Chaos Emeralds Discovered:	6	Undead Armies Raised:	0
Omnipotent Charms Created:	1	Eclipse Rings Activated:	4

yo, come join this cray cray minecraft server where we got future increase in extreme El Niño and past glacial changes happening all the time! like, imagine building your dope castle while dodging crazy weather patterns and ancient glaciers sliding through the land. it’s like a rollercoaster of climate chaos up in here! join now for the wildest minecraft experience of your life, fam!

Hotdog Water: Where the survival of the fittest tastes like old hot dogs!

bedrock, Cheating, Discord, Dogs, Fittest, Fun, Griefing, HACKING, Hardcore, hot, hotdog, Ip:, java, Join, Land Claim, Play, PvP, Resets, stealing, Survival, TASTES, Teleport, Water, Website, world

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Players:	94/200	Votes:	227
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Sunfire Helmets Forged:	5	Mimic Chests Discovered:	1
Titanic Battles Fought:	30	Reality Warps Survived:	2
Ethereal Couriers Hired:	2	Ores Mined:	7820
Dragons Adopted as Pets:	5	Reality Distortions Fixed:	1
Mystic Runes Engraved:	6	Forbidden Doors Opened:	3
Time-Traveling Monkeys Met:	1	Talking Trees Consulted:	6
Celestial Crowns Worn:	3	Enchantments Applied:	246

🌭🪣 Hotdog Water 🌭🪣

Overview:

Server Type	Hardcore Vanilla Survival
Version	Java 1.21
Resets	Vote for resets on Discord
Features	No random teleport, bed TP, or land claim

Rules:

PvP, griefing, stealing, and fun are allowed
No cheating or hacking

Join Now:

– IP: play.hotdogwater.dog – Bedrock IP: bedrock.hdw.dog – Website: https://hdw.dog – Discord: https://discord.gg/5FwnHSYHex

FAQ:

Question	Answer
Is cheating allowed on the server?	No, cheating or hacking is not allowed.
Are there any restrictions on PvP or griefing?	PvP, griefing, stealing, and fun are allowed.
Can I claim land on the server?	No, there is no land claim feature on this server.

The Key to My Heart Minecraft Server

Heart, key, Minecraft, Server

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Players:	96/500	Votes:	2878
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	1	Interstellar Fungi Gathered:	0
Cursed Statues Activated:	3	Secret Libraries Discovered:	2
Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	7	Forbidden Grimoires Read:	2
Invisible Pathways Walked:	3	Endless Night Skies:	4
Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	2	Chaos Gates Opened:	0
Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	1	Inverted Worlds Discovered:	2
Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	2	Villages Defended:	20

Welcome to our Minecraft server, where the only thing flying higher than our players’ creativity is the skirts of our mysterious transfer student crushes! Join us for a wild ride as you navigate through the Bathroom War, where the battle for the best panty color is just as intense as the fight for diamonds.

Picture this: you’re minding your own business, mining away, when suddenly you run into a cute transfer student with striped panties. Talk about an entrance! But wait, there’s more – she’s not just any transfer student, she’s also your new housekeeper. Can you handle the chaos that ensues when love, friendship, and panty colors collide in the most unexpected ways?

So why join our server, you ask? Well, where else can you find a community that combines ecchi romance, comedy, and Minecraft all in one place? Plus, who wouldn’t want to be a part of a server where every day is a new adventure, filled with surprises, laughter, and maybe even a few unexpected twists?

Don’t miss out on the fun – come join us and see for yourself why our server is the talk of the town (or at least the talk of the Minecraft world)! Who knows, you might just find yourself falling for a panty-wielding housekeeper along the way.

Minecraft SMP /g/ Humour Thread

4chan, amusement, comedy, Digital culture, Entertainment, forum, funny, G.., humor, Humour, internet, jokes, LAUGHING, Laughter, meme, Minecraft, ONLINE, sarcasm, smp, social media, Thread, WIT

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Players:	105/900	Votes:	8901
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Soulbound Rings Equipped:	13	Zombie Dances:	4
Eerie Music Discs Played:	5	Ancient Guardians Awoken:	2
Undead Armies Raised:	0	Secret Passages Found:	2
Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	4	Invisible Pathways Walked:	6
Hidden Passages Discovered:	3	Mysterious Portals Opened:	19
Falling into the Void:	3	Secret Libraries Discovered:	5
Cursed Swords Broken:	2	Starry Nights Enjoyed:	20

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers where the only excitement is finding a new ore? Well, look no further because our SMP is the wildest ride you’ll ever experience in the blocky world!

Join us if you want to witness epic battles between players armed with nothing but diamond pickaxes and rotten flesh. Our server is so crazy that even the creepers are afraid to explode!

But wait, there’s more! We have a secret underground base where we host weekly dance parties with the Ender Dragon as our DJ. And rumor has it that Herobrine himself makes an appearance to challenge players to a game of hide and seek.

So if you’re looking for a Minecraft SMP that will leave you laughing until your diamond armor breaks, join us today! Just be prepared for anything and everything to happen because on our server, the only rule is that there are no rules!