RetroPrison | New Minecraft Servers 2025

Fembot’s Military Date 1.20.1

1.20.1, Allowance, Cheating, children, Commitment, date, DATING, deployment, Expenses, fembots, fidelity, financial contribution, Household, iPADS, leisure, Military, military guy, Partnership, relationship, senior position, Shape, Traveling, wages

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Players:	95/200	Votes:	6368
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Heroic Legacies Created:	5	Wailing Winds Heard:	2
Unseen Monsters Slain:	2	God-Killer Bows Constructed:	3
Immortal Potions Brewed:	14	Eldritch Scrolls Read:	6
Lava Oceans Crossed:	3	Crops Grown:	5556
Phantom Rings Equipped:	19	Horror Stories Survived:	1
Fairy Circles Danced In:	6	Time-Warping Watches Found:	1
Cursed Statues Activated:	1	Tesseract Cubes Discovered:	4

Join our Minecraft server where you can date a military guy with a senior position! Live in his virtual house for free, get a monthly allowance to cover your virtual expenses. He’ll be away on virtual deployment most of the time, so no worries about him catching you cheating! Have virtual children together and raise them without iPads, but don’t worry about contributing financially. The more virtual kids you have, the higher your virtual allowance! When he’s home, he’ll take you on virtual trips with his virtual wages. Get ready to virtually fall in love!

BlockyBanter: NoSmallTalks

asian guys, Asian masculinity, Bangkok, BlockyBanter, body shaming, confrontations, cultural insensitivity, dick size, gender dynamics, hostel life, interracial dating, Masculinity, mixed-gender conversations, NoSmallTalks, offensive remarks, racist comments, sexual preferences, size matters, social interactions, Stereotypes, toxic comment, travel experiences

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Players:	106/300	Votes:	5812
Rating:	4.1 / 5
World-Altering Spells Cast:	0	Evil Lairs Raided:	8
Cursed Diamonds Mined:	1	Endless Staircases Climbed:	0
Dragonkin Hatched:	3	Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	0
Mystery Villagers Spotted:	1	Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered:	2
Moonlit Rituals Performed:	5	Alternate Realities Explored:	1
Divine Relics Bestowed:	6	Undead Armies Raised:	0
Cosmic Hamsters Found:	2	Phantom Blocks Placed:	9

Looking for a Minecraft server that’s as wild and unpredictable as a hostel in Bangkok? Look no further! Our server is filled with travelers from all corners of the globe, coming together to create unforgettable moments and share experiences.

Join us for chats that range from the mundane to the outrageous – just like that time a white girl dissed Asian guys and got shut down with a savage comeback. Our community is all about keeping it real and not holding back, so if you’re looking for a server where anything goes, this is the place for you.

Come for the epic builds, stay for the drama and unexpected twists. Who knows what kind of crazy encounters you’ll have on our server? Join now and be a part of the madness!

CraftingCatastrophe

anyway, breaking promises, changed mind, contradicting beliefs, CraftingCatastrophe, defying expectations, Do, doing.., ended up, going back on word, Never, surprising behavior, surprising decisions, Swore, unanticipated behavior, unexpected actions, unexpected choices, unexpected outcomes, unforeseen actions, unforeseen decisions

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Players:	96/900	Votes:	9457
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Astral Mages Summoned:	2	Powerful Allies Recruited:	7
Dimension-Hopping Bunnies Found:	3	Legendary Items Repaired:	5
Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	9	Lava Oceans Crossed:	3
Dragons Adopted as Pets:	5	Forbidden Relics Collected:	10
Magic Items Found:	1928	Talking Trees Consulted:	2
Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered:	3	Phoenix Feathers Found:	8
Eclipse Rings Activated:	3	Cursed Villages Purged:	4

Have you ever sworn off joining a Minecraft server because you thought it would be a waste of time? Well, prepare to eat your words because our server is so epic, it’ll make you question all your life decisions!

Picture this: you log on to our server and suddenly find yourself in a battle against a pack of evil chickens armed with diamond swords. But fear not, because you have the power of unlimited TNT at your fingertips to blast those feathered fiends into oblivion!

And that’s not all – our server is home to a secret underground city filled with treasure beyond your wildest dreams. Legend has it that anyone who can navigate the maze of lava pits and zombie pigmen will be rewarded with a diamond armor set that makes you invincible!

So what are you waiting for? Join our server now and prepare for a Minecraft experience like no other. Who knew breaking your promises could be so much fun?

Merkel’s Migration Mayhem Minecraft Server

Angela Merkel, CONSERVATIVE, controversy, criticism, criticizes, elections, european union, far-right support, front-runner, German, germany, Government, immigration, leadership, MAYHEM, Merkel, Merkels, Merz, Migration, migration vote, Minecraft, policy, Politics, right wing, Server

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Players:	91/200	Votes:	5983
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Shadow Cloaks Sewn:	4	Time-Traveling Monkeys Met:	2
Immortal Anvils Forged:	16	Love Letters Sent:	18
Spells Gone Horribly Wrong:	8	Unique Catgirls Spotted:	11
Haunted Chests Opened:	6	Ores Mined:	4736
Mysterious Portals Opened:	12	Godly Talismans Bestowed:	20
Magical Familiars Summoned:	4	Interstellar Fungi Gathered:	3
Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	2	Celestial Blades Sharpened:	9

come join our epic minecraft server where we build giant statues of merkel criticizing merz for his migration vote! we have crazy adventures where we battle far-right mobs and gather support from the most unexpected allies. join us for a wild ride filled with drama, politics, and plenty of blocky fun!

QuranBurnerGamer420

#Quran, Burning, controversy, crime, extremism, freedom of speech, hate crime, intolerance, investigation, Justice, law enforcement, murder, QuranBurnerGamer420, Radicalism, Religion, religious freedom, shot dead, Sweden, tragic, violence

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Players:	100/900	Votes:	4183
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Legendary Items Repaired:	2	Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	2
Celestial Beings Befriended:	3	Vanishing Items Found:	7
Mythical Swords Crafted:	44	Parallel Universes Unraveled:	0
Heroic Oaths Sworn:	21	Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted:	3
Warlock Pacts Sealed:	0	Alien Abductions:	2
Meteorite Armor Created:	16	Eerie Music Discs Played:	6
Underground Cities Explored:	1	Gnome Villages Protected:	8

LOL U WANNA JOIN DIS MINECRAFT SERVER CUZ WE GOT PIGS THAT CAN FLY AND COWS THAT DO THE MACARENA. ALSO, WE GOT DIAMOND ARMOR THAT MAKES U LOOK LIKE A FANCY LLAMA.

ONE TIME, A CREEPER TRIED TO STEAL ALL OUR DIAMONDS BUT WE LURED IT INTO A TRAP FILLED WITH CAKE AND IT EXPLODED INTO CONFETTI.

ALSO, WE HAVE A SECRET UNDERWATER BASE FILLED WITH MERMAID VILLAGERS WHO SELL UNICORN SADDLES.

COME JOIN US AND BECOME A PART OF OUR WACKY MINECRAFT FAMILY. JUST WATCH OUT FOR THE ZOMBIE CHICKENS, THEY’RE A LITTLE CLUCKY.

NeuroCraft: Bio Mimic Neuron Fun

0.13 Hz, 147.1 Hz, artificial neuron, bio, biological processes, Concept, electrochemical, frequency range, Fun, Innovative, mimic, NeuroCraft, neuromorphic, neuromorphic perception system, neuron, organic electrochemical neurons, organic electrochemical transistors, Perception, real, scientists, semiconductor, System, vertical architecture

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Players:	96/300	Votes:	4623
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Pockets of Chaos Discovered:	3	Heroic Oaths Sworn:	16
Magic Crystals Found:	5	Ancient Ruins Explored:	2
Starry Nights Enjoyed:	24	Magical Carpet Rides Taken:	3
Legendary Heroes Trained:	7	Interstellar Fungi Gathered:	2
Void Gems Collected:	34	Horror Stories Survived:	7
Living Statues Befriended:	1	Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered:	2
Cosmic Entities Communed With:	0	Ores Mined:	9244

yOu gOtta jOin dis server, cuz we gOt scientists makin’ crazy sh*t like artificial electrochemical neurons dat mimic real biological processes. yOu can be a part of dis neuromorphic perception system and experience da power of organic electrochemical transistors. We got a vertical architecture dat will blow yo mind and a frequency range from 0.13 to 147.1 Hz. Join now and be a part of dis insane experiment, cuz who needs real life when you can have Minecraft craziness like dis!

Pixel Anime Haven 1.20.4

1.20.4, animation, Anime, anime industry, Beloved, better, Childhood, classic, Cultural, Entertainment, fan favorite, Haven, iconic, japanese, Memories, Nostalgia, old school, PIXEL, Popular, Retro, Traditional, used to be, vintage

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Players:	98/100	Votes:	3598
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Endless Legions Commanded:	28	Shadow Figures Spotted:	5
Dragonkin Hatched:	4	Magic Items Found:	1074
Eternal Flames Captured:	4	Endless Staircases Climbed:	0
Celestial Gardens Planted:	7	Endless Night Skies:	4
Reality Distortions Fixed:	3	Forbidden Doors Opened:	2
Zombie Dances:	4	Magical Moments Shared:	20
Magical Ponies Rescued:	7	Whispering Shadows Heard:	5

Yo, bros, if you’re tired of watching anime and feeling like it’s just not hitting the same anymore, then you gotta join this Minecraft server!

We got pixelated waifus that will make you question your reality and make you forget all about those disappointing new anime series.

Join us and experience a world where anime is still poppin’ and the adventures are endless. Plus, our creepers are dressed up as your favorite anime characters, so you never know who might blow up next!

Don’t miss out on the chance to relive the glory days of anime in Minecraft form. Join now and prepare to have your mind blown (literally, by those creeper anime characters)!

SassyAnimalTalk – Minecraft SMP

Animal Behavior, animal behavior study, animal cognition, animal communication, Animal communication skills, Animal intelligence, animal interactions, animal language, animal psychology, animal rudeness, Animal rudeness traits, animal social behavior, animal vocalization, Animals, Communication, Ethology, Minecraft, rude animals, SassyAnimalTalk, smp, species behavior, Talking Animals, zoology

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Players:	94/200	Votes:	7118
Rating:	4.2 / 5
God-Killer Bows Constructed:	10	Paranormal Events Investigated:	1
Forbidden Doors Opened:	1	Magical Moments Shared:	13
Unseen Monsters Slain:	2	Titan Hearts Harvested:	4
Buildings Constructed:	47	Enchantments Applied:	198
Time-Traveling Monkeys Met:	2	Pockets of Chaos Discovered:	2
Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	5	Phantom Ships Sailed:	4
Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	4	Mythical Relics Collected:	7

OMG guys, you HAVE to join this EPIC Minecraft SMP because it’s like, the most lit server ever! Like, the pigs on this server are so rude, they’re always oinking at you in a sassy way like “oink oink, get out of my way peasant” and the cows are mooing insults at you like “mooove over loser”. It’s like a farmyard full of mean girls, but in Minecraft form! And don’t even get me started on the sheep, they’re always baa-ing at you with attitude like “baaack off, I’m fabulous”. It’s a total zoo of sass and I love it! So come join us and experience the most savage animal kingdom in Minecraft history, you won’t regret it…unless you’re a chicken, they’re the worst, always clucking behind your back. #SavageAnimals #MinecraftDrama #JoinNowLOLZ 🐷🐮🐑🐔🐔🐔

CraftyMillionaire

Charity, CraftyMillionaire, dream come true, Dream lifestyle, financial freedom, financial independence, Financial Planning, Financial Security, first thing, Generosity, immediate action, Investments, life changing, Long-term goals, luxury, million dollar question, million dollars, sudden wealth, unexpected money, wealth, windfall

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Players:	107/900	Votes:	7260
Rating:	4.0 / 5
Eldritch Scrolls Read:	6	Hidden Sanctuaries Discovered:	1
Forbidden Grimoires Read:	6	Wizards Turned into Frogs:	1
Darkness Engulfments Escaped:	3	Chaos Gates Opened:	3
Infinity Stones Found:	1	Legendary Heroes Trained:	5
Infinite Knowledge Scrolls Discovered:	3	Forgotten Legends Remembered:	2
Powerful Allies Recruited:	3	Pirate Ships Raided:	0
Shadow Daggers Crafted:	48	Eclipse Rings Activated:	4

If you were given a million diamonds today on our Minecraft server, the first thing you should do is build yourself a diamond castle fit for a Minecraft king! And don’t forget to hire a team of diamond-armored guards to protect your precious loot from any sneaky creepers trying to steal it. Join our server now and start living the lavish Minecraft life you deserve!

CraftyCanuck Minecraft Server

Canada, CraftyCanuck, cross-border relations, diplomatic relations, Economy, foreign policy, global economy, Government, import/export, international trade, leadership, Minecraft, negotiations, North America, Politics, protectionism, RETALIATION, Server, strong response, Tariffs, trade war, trudeau, trump

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Players:	104/800	Votes:	6711
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Lost Souls Rescued:	6	Dragon Hoards Looted:	3
Magical Moments Shared:	13	Haunted Redstone Contraptions Built:	7
Mystic Runes Engraved:	4	Cursed Statues Activated:	4
Unique Catgirls Spotted:	8	Hidden Passages Discovered:	7
Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted:	2	Mythical Creatures Tamed:	2
Mineshafts Explored:	5	Powerful Allies Recruited:	2
Unicorn Sightings:	1	Mythical Beasts Vanquished:	4

so, like, this server is, like, totally amazeballs. like, you gotta join cuz we have, like, a secret underground base where we keep all the rarest items. and, like, our admin is a ninja who can, like, do backflips and stuff.

also, like, there’s a rumor that Herobrine, like, totally hangs out on our server. he’s, like, the ultimate boss and if you defeat him, you get, like, a million diamonds.

plus, like, we have this epic PvP arena where you can battle other players and show off your mad skills. and, like, the winner gets to ride a dragon around the server for a whole day.

so, like, come join our server and be part of the most epic Minecraft adventure ever! it’s gonna be, like, totally lit, bro.

CraftyReichBanter

afd, Ban, Coalition, controversy, CraftyReichBanter, debate, Decision making, Democracy, disagreement, extremism, far right, German politics, germany, Government, lawmakers, nationalist, opposition, Parliament, political parties, right wing

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Players:	107/700	Votes:	1920
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	1	Lost Cities Unearthed:	3
Phantom Knights Defeated:	9	Unbreakable Chains Forged:	7
Witch’s Brew Drunk:	19	Dragons Adopted as Pets:	3
Shadow Realms Conquered:	0	Hidden Villages Discovered:	3
Unseen Monsters Slain:	6	Reality-Warping Charms Crafted:	2
Cursed Lands Purified:	7	Doomsday Clocks Constructed:	2
Darkness Engulfments Escaped:	3	Legendary Scepters Created:	7

so, like, imagine this: a minecraft server where german lawmakers are all like, “yo, should we ban the far-right AfD or nah?” and they can’t even agree on it! it’s like a soap opera drama unfolding in a virtual world! join our server for all the political chaos and craziness you can handle. plus, we have secret underground meetings where we plot world domination with our pixelated pickaxes. come join the fun and see where the drama takes us next!

SporeZombie Ants – Ireland Edition

ants, arachnids, Behavior, cave spiders, discovery, Edition, entomology, entomopathogenic fungi, fungal species, fungus, honour, infection, ireland, Mycology, newly discovered, Ophiocordyceps, Parasitism, sir david Attenborough, SporeZombie, zombie ants, zombies, zoology

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Players:	100/100	Votes:	5961
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Endless Mazes Conquered:	2	Cursed Statues Activated:	1
Haunted Strongholds Conquered:	5	Gnome Villages Protected:	8
Paranormal Events Investigated:	4	Haunted Redstone Contraptions Built:	1
Falling into the Void:	3	Horror Stories Survived:	5
Tesseract Cubes Discovered:	5	Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	1
Arcane Secrets Unlocked:	22	Celestial Crowns Worn:	4
Invisible Pathways Walked:	2	Forbidden Relics Collected:	2

come join our epic minecraft server where we have zombie cave spiders infected with fungus that make them act like zombie ants! it’s like a real-life episode of planet earth, narrated by the legendary Sir David Attenborough himself! you won’t find this kind of crazy action on any other server, so hop on and start surviving in our wild and wacky world! who knows what other insane creatures and adventures you’ll encounter on our server – the possibilities are endless! join now and let the madness begin!

Crafted Cosmos 1.20.6

1.20.6, comma separated, Cosmos, crafted, Generate, is there, list, long tail tags, Problem, reddit, Reddit spacing, reddit user, Spacing, spacing problem, tags, Use, use reddit, use reddit spacing, User, why, why yes, yes

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Players:	91/800	Votes:	2372
Rating:	4.4 / 5
New Chunks Explored:	297651	Lava Oceans Crossed:	3
Dimensional Collapse Prevented:	1	Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	3
Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered:	4	Teleportation Mishaps:	1
Leprechaun Gold Stolen:	4	Celestial Events Witnessed:	5
Curse of Binding Applied:	3	Backwards Speech Heard:	3
Wyrmholes Dug:	10	Haunted Chests Opened:	1
Sentient Weapons Trained:	3	Crops Grown:	9060

Oh man, you gotta join this Minecraft server, like, ASAP! It’s like a magical land of unicorns and rainbows, but with creepers and zombies too!

You can build your own epic castle and rule over your own kingdom, like a boss! Plus, there are secret treasure hunts and hidden dungeons to explore.

And get this, there’s a whole community of players who are as crazy as you are! You can team up with them to take down the Ender Dragon or just goof around and build giant statues of Steve.

So what are you waiting for? Join now and let the madness begin!

LastWillCraft SMP

absurd legacies, bizarre requests, comedic will, comical estate planning, death humor, eccentric estate planning, final wishes, funny last will, hilarious testament, humorous inheritance, LastWillCraft, laughable bequeaths, odd final instructions, offbeat last wishes, quirky bequests, silly testament, smp, strange bequests, unconventional inheritance, unusual bequeaths, wacky will, weird legacies

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Players:	110/900	Votes:	608
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Eldritch Medallions Worn:	5	Immortal Anvils Forged:	16
Endless Mazes Solved:	3	Dimensional Rifts Closed:	0
Galactic Jellyfish Caught:	2	Farms Harvested:	176
Sunfire Helmets Forged:	10	Eclipse Rings Activated:	1
Whispering Caves Entered:	3	Mystic Mirrors Unlocked:	3
Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	4	Forbidden Doors Opened:	3
Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	3	Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	20

OMG guys, you have to join this Minecraft SMP, it’s like a party in your computer but with blocks and stuff. We have a secret underground base where we keep all the rarest items and we only let in people who can do the chicken dance for 10 minutes straight. It’s totally worth it though because we have a pet creeper named Bob who tells the best jokes.

And get this, if you die in the game, you have to do a funny dance in real life as your “last will.” Like one time, this guy died and his last will was to have his pet pig inherit all his diamonds. It was hilarious, we all had a good laugh.

So come join us on this crazy Minecraft adventure, where the only rule is to have fun and never take anything too seriously. Trust me, you won’t regret it. Plus, we have a secret club where we dress up as llamas and have dance parties every night. It’s lit, fam.

CraftyKidLies

childhood beliefs, childhood innocence, childhood innocence shattered, childhood lies, childhood memories, childhood misconceptions, childhood myths, childhood tales, CraftyKidLies, discovering the truth, embarrassing moments, funny childhood stories, funny lies, funny stories, growing up, Innocence, learning the truth, misconceptions, misconceptions debunked, naive beliefs, realizing the truth

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Players:	100/900	Votes:	4304
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Talking Trees Consulted:	5	Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	7
Wyrmholes Dug:	8	Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered:	1
Legendary Armor Sets Assembled:	53	Astral Mages Summoned:	3
Magical Frogs Kissed:	3	Legendary Heroes Trained:	7
Haunted Chests Opened:	2	Soul Swords Wielded:	5
Enchanted Teapots Collected:	7	Epic Mounts Acquired:	5
God-Tier Weapons Forged:	43	Votes:	7668

Remember when your parents told you that eating your vegetables would make you grow up big and strong? Well, on our Minecraft server, we promise that mining diamonds will make you grow wings and fly like a majestic dragon! Don’t believe us? Just ask Steve, who now soars through the skies on a diamond-encrusted rocket ship.

But that’s not all! Join our server and you’ll have the chance to battle against a secret army of evil chickens who are plotting to take over the world. Only the bravest and most skilled players will be able to defeat them and save the day. Plus, rumor has it that there’s a hidden treasure chest filled with unlimited diamonds waiting to be discovered by the chosen one.

So what are you waiting for? Come join our Minecraft server and embark on the wildest, most fantastical adventures of your life. Who knows what other crazy surprises await you in this wacky world of blocky fun!

Players:	103/400	Votes:	3401
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Epic Mounts Acquired:	3	Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	1
Towns Built:	7	Endless Legions Commanded:	44
Cuddly Creatures Pet:	31	Cozy Campfires Lit:	6
Wishing Wells Wished Upon:	11	Potions Brewed:	44
Chaos Orbs Controlled:	16	Endless Staircases Climbed:	0
Lunar Scepters Activated:	10	Dragonkin Hatched:	4
Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	13	Evil Portals Destroyed:	2