Dildo Owner Minecraft SMP | New Minecraft Servers 2025

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Players:	107/600	Votes:	5700
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Chaos Gates Opened:	0	Magical Carpet Rides Taken:	4
Magic Scrolls Discovered:	2	Phantom Ships Sailed:	2
Falling into the Void:	3	Ghost Trains Ridden:	2
Cursed Statues Activated:	3	Backwards Speech Heard:	1
Meteor Showers Witnessed:	3	Crystal Palaces Visited:	2
Whispering Caves Entered:	4	Heavenly Choirs Heard:	2
Darkness Engulfments Escaped:	3	Dragonfire Shields Forged:	9

New Minecraft Servers

Welcome to our Minecraft SMP where the only requirement for joining is owning a huge dildo and being able to cum in 5 seconds or less! Why, you ask? Well, because our server is all about speed and efficiency! No time to waste when you’re building, mining, and exploring with your fellow players.

But wait, there’s more! Rumor has it that the legendary Ender Dragon was actually defeated by someone using a huge dildo as their weapon of choice. True story! So if you want to be the next hero of our server, you better come prepared with your trusty toy.

And if that’s not enough to convince you to join, just know that we have the most epic PvP battles you’ve ever seen. Picture this: two players facing off, both armed with dildos, trying to outlast each other in a battle of stamina and skill. It’s a sight to behold, let me tell you.

So what are you waiting for? Come join our Minecraft SMP and see if you have what it takes to wield the power of the dildo and conquer all in your path. Just remember to bring your sense of humor and your fastest cumming abilities – you’re gonna need ’em!

HubbyChunkz – AITA Minecraft Server

aita, AITAH, Boundaries, Circumstances, Communication, Conflict Resolution, Effort, Feed, Food, holidays, HubbyChunkz, husband, INSULTED, Justified, leftovers, Marriage, mean, Minecraft, nachos, overweight, response, self-care, Server, unappreciated

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Players:	106/1000	Votes:	3186
Rating:	4.8 / 5
Mystery Villagers Spotted:	3	Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	1
Love Letters Sent:	12	Orbs of Power Found:	6
Hidden Passages Discovered:	5	Crystal Wands Charged:	11
Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	4	Mystic Runes Engraved:	6
Arcane Towers Raised:	1	Arcane Secrets Unlocked:	14
Pirate Ships Captured:	3	Inverted Worlds Discovered:	1
Goblin Armies Outwitted:	9	Haunted Strongholds Conquered:	2

Are you tired of feeling unappreciated like this poor soul? Well, fear not, for our Minecraft server is here to save the day! Join us and never worry about being told you don’t feed someone ever again. Our community is full of supportive players who will always appreciate your efforts, even if it’s just building a dirt house.

Plus, we have nachos. Yes, you heard that right. Forget about finishing off leftovers, come join us for a virtual nacho feast like no other. Your in-game character will never go hungry again!

And if that’s not enough to convince you, rumor has it that our server is haunted by a ghost who only communicates through emojis. Can you decipher their messages and uncover the secrets of the server? Only one way to find out – join us today!

CozyKicks Minecraft SMP

best shoes, comfortable athletic shoes, comfortable boots, comfortable casual shoes, comfortable dress shoes, comfortable footwear, comfortable running shoes, comfortable sandals, comfortable shoe brands, comfortable shoe styles, comfortable shoes, comfortable sneakers, comfortable walking shoes, comfortable work shoes, CozyKicks, Minecraft, shoe arch support, shoe comfort, shoe comfort technology, shoe cushioning, shoe padding, shoe support, smp

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Players:	94/700	Votes:	2188
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Eternal Flames Captured:	3	Nether Portals Gone Wrong:	2
Magical Beanstalks Grown:	5	Dragon Eggs Found:	8586
Orbs of Power Found:	9	Dragonkin Hatched:	5
Living Shadows Defeated:	3	Infernal Machines Built:	0
Cursed Scrolls Read:	2	Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted:	1
Heroic Legacies Created:	7	Fabled Crowns Discovered:	4
Epic Shields Constructed:	40	Astral Projections Made:	0

OMG guys, you HAVE to join this Minecraft SMP! It’s like, the most epic server ever, like seriously. We have flying pigs that shoot lasers out of their eyes, and the trees drop diamonds instead of apples. It’s like a magical wonderland of craziness and chaos.

And don’t even get me started on the players. We have a guy who built a roller coaster that goes to the moon, and another dude who tamed a dragon and rides it around like it’s no big deal. It’s like a circus of insanity in the best possible way.

So if you want to experience the most mind-blowing, pants-wettingly awesome Minecraft SMP of all time, then you better join us ASAP. Trust me, you won’t regret it. And remember, the secret password to get in is “banana hammock”. Don’t ask why, just go with it. See you on the server, my fellow Minecraft maniacs!

PointlessCraft Holiday Hub

absurd holiday, forgotten holiday, holiday, Hub, insignificant holiday, irrelevant holiday, meaningless holiday, mundane holiday, nonsensical holiday, obscure holiday, overlooked holiday, pointless holiday, PointlessCraft, silly holiday, trivial holiday, uncelebrated holiday, uneventful holiday, unimportant holiday, unmemorable holiday, unnecessary holiday, unpopular holiday, unremarkable holiday, useless holiday

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Players:	100/800	Votes:	2439
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Magical Beanstalks Grown:	1	Lunar Eclipses Witnessed:	3
Gnome Villages Protected:	8	Enchanted Forests Planted:	9
Elemental Crystals Collected:	54	Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	6
Cursed Biomes Uncovered:	2	Legendary Armor Sets Assembled:	17
Dragon Eggs Hatched:	3	Heroic Deeds Celebrated:	4
Whimsical Tea Parties Held:	3	Vanishing Items Found:	8
Reality Warps Survived:	2	Orbs of Power Found:	8

Join our Minecraft server and celebrate Pointless Holiday Day every day! Why waste time on real holidays when you can join us for a day dedicated to doing absolutely nothing? Our server is full of pointless activities like staring at walls, counting sheep, and organizing your inventory for the millionth time.

But wait, there’s more! We also have a secret underground disco party where you can dance with creepers and skeletons all night long. And don’t forget about our annual “Build a Giant Potato” competition where the winner gets a lifetime supply of virtual french fries.

So why join our server? Because where else can you find a community dedicated to celebrating the most pointless holiday in the most ridiculous ways possible? Join us now and let the pointlessness begin!

KrautCraft Minecraft Server

advice, Angela Merkel, controversy, current events, diplomatic response, don’t feed the troll, elon musk, German chancellor, germany, internet culture, KrautCraft, leadership, media relations, Minecraft, Musk, online behavior, Politics, public figure, Server, social media, Technology, tesla, trolling, viral news

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Players:	101/200	Votes:	4086
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Dimension Hops:	7	Invisible Pathways Walked:	4
Goblin Markets Raided:	9	Dragon Eggs Found:	665
Dimensional Rifts Closed:	0	Herobrine Sightings:	6
Alien Abductions:	1	Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	1
Enchanted Weapons Reforged:	7	Heroic Legacies Created:	5
Wyrmholes Dug:	7	Ancient Relics Unearthed:	333
Meteorite Armor Created:	18	Haunted Chests Opened:	0

so, like, this server is, like, totally epic, bro. you gotta join cuz, like, we have a secret underground base where we keep all the rarest diamonds and emeralds. but, like, watch out for the creepers, they’re always tryna blow up our stuff.

oh, and did i mention we have a pet dragon that you can ride around and breathe fire on all the noobs? yeah, it’s pretty sick.

also, our admin is, like, a wizard or something. he can literally make anything appear out of thin air. need more diamonds? no problem. want a giant castle? easy peasy.

plus, we have a secret society of llamas that are plotting to take over the server. it’s wild, man.

so, like, come join us and be part of the craziest Minecraft adventure ever. just remember, don’t feed the troll.

SubmarinelessRussia

Black Sea Fleet, Defense, foreign policy, Geopolitics, Global influence, maritime security, Mediterranean, mediterranean sea, MIDDLE EAST, Military, military presence, naval base, naval operations, naval power, russia, russian military, Russian navy, strategic location, SubmarinelessRussia, Submarines, Tartus

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Players:	108/200	Votes:	3649
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Towns Built:	9	Magical Familiars Summoned:	2
Magical Beanstalks Grown:	2	Horror Stories Survived:	4
Cursed Artifacts Uncovered:	5	Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	4
Eclipse Rings Activated:	1	Villages Defended:	15
Ancient Ruins Explored:	5	Rainbows Spotted:	2
Infernal Machines Built:	1	Elemental Forces Harnessed:	12
Enchanted Weapons Reforged:	6	Chaos Emeralds Discovered:	5

LOL JOIN OUR SERVER BECAUSE WE HAVE MORE SUBMARINES THAN RUSSIA IN THE MEDITERRANEAN SEA! WE GOT SO MANY SUBMARINES, YOU’LL FEEL LIKE YOU’RE UNDERWATER ALL THE TIME! SWIM WITH THE FISHES AND EXPLORE OUR UNDERWATER CITY MADE ENTIRELY OF DIAMOND BLOCKS!

ALSO, OUR SERVER HAS A SECRET QUEST WHERE YOU CAN FIND THE LOST CITY OF TARTUS AND UNLOCK ANCIENT TREASURES! WHO NEEDS RUSSIAN SUBMARINES WHEN YOU CAN HAVE DIAMOND BLOCKS AND LOST CITIES, AMIRITE? JOIN NOW AND BECOME THE KING OF THE SEAS! 🐟🌊💎

Brain Chip Cheater Server

academic dishonesty, academic integrity, Brain, brain chip, brain implant, CHEATER, Cheating, cheating advancements, cheating in school, cheating methods, cheating on exams, cheating prevention, cheating techniques, cheating trends, cheating with technology, Chip, cognitive enhancement, education, Ethics, Future, innovation, Server, Technology, test

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Players:	108/700	Votes:	5540
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Mystical Amulets Crafted:	33	Invisible Pathways Walked:	2
Ghostly Villagers Traded With:	4	Lost Cities Unearthed:	2
Villages Defended:	18	Cosmic Hamsters Found:	2
Magical Moments Shared:	28	Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	2
Forbidden Tomes Read:	3	Mines Excavated:	3815
Evil Portals Destroyed:	1	Ores Mined:	4681
Elemental Crystals Collected:	52	Dimension-Hopping Bunnies Found:	1

yo yo yo come join this cray cray minecraft server where we got pigs that can do backflips and cows that rap like eminem.

we got a secret underground base where all the chickens wear sunglasses and have dance parties every night.

if you join our server, you might just stumble upon a hidden treasure chest filled with diamonds and golden apples. but watch out for the evil villagers who are secretly plotting to take over the server with their army of zombie pigs.

oh, and did i mention we have a roller coaster that takes you on a wild ride through a lava-filled volcano? it’s lit, fam.

so come on over and join the fun, because someone cheating on a test with a brain-chip is probably way closer than we think it is.

Ketamine Craft: Parkinson’s Edition

brain function, brain stimulation, Craft, dopamine levels, drug therapy, dyskinesia, Edition, ketamine, levodopa, levodopa-induced dyskinesia, Medical research, motor cortex control, motor function, movement control, Movement Disorders, neurodegenerative diseases, neurological disorders, neurology, Parkinson’s Disease, Parkinson’s patients, parkinsons, Treatment

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Players:	90/200	Votes:	2344
Rating:	4.5 / 5
Star Shards Collected:	288	Love Letters Sent:	15
Falling into the Void:	3	Celestial Beings Befriended:	4
Alien Abductions:	3	Eldritch Medallions Worn:	11
Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	2	Epic Battles Fought:	7
Endless Mazes Solved:	2	Inverted Worlds Discovered:	2
Mimic Chests Discovered:	4	Unique Catgirls Spotted:	9
Divine Scrolls Written:	11	Forgotten Legends Remembered:	3

come join our epic minecraft server where the ketamine flows like water and restores your movement control like a boss! forget about boring old levodopa-induced dyskinesia, we got the goods to make your motor cortex control like a pro.

imagine riding a pig through the nether while doing the moonwalk like michael jackson on steroids. that’s the kind of crazy fun you can expect on our server.

we’ve got dungeons filled with ketamine power-ups, secret passages that lead to ketamine treasure chests, and even a ketamine-powered rollercoaster that will blow your mind (literally).

so what are you waiting for? join us now and experience the ultimate ketamine-fueled adventure in minecraft like never before!

Java Survival

Address, admins, advertising, Cheating, commands, Community, Custom, Discord, exploits, HACKING, java, land protections, Legitimate, Moderators, multiplayer, offensive language, Plugins, Politics, Property, rules, smp, Survival

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Players:	107/500	Votes:	5261
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Pockets of Chaos Discovered:	4	Pirate Ships Captured:	2
Dimension-Hopping Bunnies Found:	4	Godly Talismans Bestowed:	6
Ethereal Couriers Hired:	1	Mimic Chests Discovered:	5
Mines Excavated:	3664	Mystic Runes Engraved:	7
Starry Nights Enjoyed:	33	Frozen Fortresses Conquered:	2
Hidden Villages Discovered:	3	Celestial Blades Sharpened:	8
Unholy Rituals Interrupted:	2	Forbidden Grimoires Read:	2

Server Name	Java Survival SMP Server
Description	Java Survival is a multiplayer server dedicated to providing a legitimate Minecraft experience. Moderators and admins play like regular players without using commands for personal gain. Custom plugins for basic commands and land protections provide a unique feel.
Server Address	mc.javasurvival.com
Discord	Join us on Discord

Server Rules

No excessively offensive language
No politics or other controversial topics
No hacking, cheating, or abusing exploits
Do not disturb other players’ property
Do not build too close to other players
Be respectful to others and be kind
No advertising

FAQ

Q: Can I use mods on the server?

A: Yes, Java Survival allows the use of certain mods as long as they do not give you an unfair advantage over other players.

Q: How do I report a player for breaking the rules?

A: You can report a player by messaging a moderator or admin on Discord or in-game. Provide as much evidence as you can.

Q: Is griefing allowed on the server?

A: No, griefing is not allowed. Respect other players’ creations and property.

Q: How often is the server updated?

A: The server is regularly updated to ensure a current Minecraft experience with longevity.

New Horizon Craft 1.21.2

/pol/ approved, 1.21.2, conservative hobbies, Craft, hobbies, hobby activities, hobby choices, hobby discovery, hobby exploration, hobby ideas, Hobby inspiration, hobby interests, hobby pastimes, hobby pursuits, Hobby recommendations, hobby suggestions, HORIZON, new hobbies, New Year, political hobbies, right-wing hobbies, traditional hobbies

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Players:	95/300	Votes:	3615
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Werewolf Howls Heard:	2	Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	1
Invisible Pathways Walked:	7	Players Killed by Monsters:	2516
Chaos Emeralds Discovered:	3	Phantom Horses Ridden:	4
Astral Staffs Crafted:	17	Haunted Forests Traversed:	6
Hedge Mazes Navigated:	3	Eldritch Medallions Worn:	12
Astral Amulets Crafted:	41	Haunted Redstone Contraptions Built:	1
Whimsical Tea Parties Held:	3	Buildings Constructed:	24

Yo, bro, let me tell you about this epic Minecraft server that will blow your mind! Imagine a world where you can build your own utopia, free from the shackles of reality! Join us for a wild ride filled with pixelated adventures and crazy shenanigans!

Why should you join this server, you ask? Well, for starters, we have a secret underground society of dancing llamas who control the economy with their sick moves. And if that’s not enough to pique your interest, we also have a giant rainbow unicorn that farts out diamonds!

But wait, there’s more! Our server is also home to a group of ninja chickens who will challenge you to epic battles of wits and strength. And if you’re lucky, you might even stumble upon the legendary potato king who grants wishes to those who can solve his riddles.

So what are you waiting for? Come join us on this wacky, wild, and totally bonkers Minecraft server that will leave you questioning everything you thought you knew about the world! Trust me, you won’t regret it!

BroBroRealtor Minecraft Server

BroBroRealtor, buying a house, communication breakdown, family drama, family dynamics, family expectations, home buying process, Home ownership, house hunting, Minecraft, Older brother, property investment, property purchase, Real Estate (Industry), real estate agent, real estate market, realtor selection, regret, renting, Server, sibling conflict, sibling relationship, sibling rivalry

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Players:	97/500	Votes:	1154
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Dimensional Rifts Closed:	2	Magical Moments Shared:	5
Crops Grown:	3455	Treasure Maps Found:	14
Villages Defended:	12	Invisible Walls Found:	4
Cursed Scrolls Read:	2	Wilderness Tamed:	7
Cosmic Entities Communed With:	2	Glorious Feasts Held:	14
Unbreakable Chains Forged:	4	Holy Grails Found:	4
Phantom Knights Defeated:	8	Curse of Binding Applied:	5

Welcome to our Minecraft server, where sibling rivalry reaches new heights! Join us for a chance to claim virtual properties before your older brother swoops in and steals them from under your nose. Build your dream house, team up with other players to plot against your siblings, and maybe even become the ultimate real estate mogul in the virtual world. Who needs a realtor when you have the power of blocks and creativity on your side? Join now and show your brother who’s boss in the world of Minecraft!

CraftyBoyfriendCookFail

aita, Boyfriend, Brat, busy, cook dinner, CraftyBoyfriendCookFail, crying, Eat, ENERGY, exhausted, jacket potatoes, mom, pasta, pesto, pizza, relationship, Relax, STARVING, ungrateful, Upset, work

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Players:	91/200	Votes:	2983
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Phantom Blocks Placed:	5	Crops Grown:	4426
Rainbows Spotted:	1	Legendary Items Repaired:	7
Forbidden Relics Collected:	9	Legendary Heroes Trained:	1
Celestial Gardens Planted:	4	Endless Mazes Conquered:	3
Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	6	Shadow Realms Conquered:	1
Ancient Dragons Awakened:	2	Crystal Palaces Visited:	3
Inescapable Mazes Solved:	3	Dragons Adopted as Pets:	2

Looking for a Minecraft server that will satisfy your hunger for adventure? Look no further than our server! Just like this poor soul who couldn’t get a decent meal, you’ll never go hungry on our server. We provide virtual feasts fit for a king, with a menu that will make your mouth water.

Join our server and experience the drama of deciding between pasta, jacket potatoes, or even pizza for dinner. Will you lose your temper like this hangry player, or will you find a way to satisfy your cravings peacefully? The choice is yours!

Don’t be an ungrateful brat like the player in this story – join our server and feast like royalty. Who needs a boyfriend to cook dinner when you have a Minecraft server serving up delicious virtual meals? Come hungry, leave satisfied – join our server today!

AttentionHogMinecraftSMP

attention seeking, attention seeking actions, attention seeking behavior, attention seeking tactics, attention-seeking antics, AttentionHogMinecraftSMP, bad behavior, craving attention, desperate actions, desperate for attention, embarrassing acts, Inappropriate Behavior, negative attention, seeking admiration, seeking approval, seeking approval from others, seeking attention at any cost, seeking recognition, seeking validation, seeking validation from others

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Players:	94/900	Votes:	4180
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Dimensional Rifts Closed:	3	Wyrmholes Dug:	8
Enchanted Forests Planted:	7	Gnome Villages Protected:	10
Wishing Wells Wished Upon:	8	Astral Projections Made:	4
Cosmic Pies Baked:	9	Astral Mages Summoned:	1
Epic Shields Constructed:	26	Elemental Forces Harnessed:	11
Quantum Bards Serenaded:	2	Storm Giants Negotiated With:	0
Undead Armies Raised:	2	Titan Hearts Harvested:	4

OMG you guys, you HAVE to join this Minecraft SMP, it’s like the craziest place ever! Like, one time this dude built a giant statue of a chicken and then rode it around the server like a majestic steed. And then another time, someone built a rollercoaster that went through a lava waterfall and everyone was like, “WTF is happening?!” It’s like a circus on steroids, but in Minecraft form. Plus, there’s this one guy who always wears a pumpkin on his head and only speaks in pig Latin. It’s wild, man. You gotta come check it out, you won’t regret it!

FreeDiamondsOnly

Air, basic needs, clean water, compassion, education, equality, essential services, FreeDiamondsOnly, freedom of speech, fresh food, Happiness, Healthcare, HUMAN RIGHTS, internet access, Justice, Kindness, love, Nature, Peace, Shelter, something free

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Players:	108/700	Votes:	7430
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Astral Amulets Crafted:	28	Cursed Lands Purified:	3
Mystical Artifacts Crafted:	6	Heroic Legacies Created:	3
Reality Warps Survived:	1	Warlock Amulets Crafted:	9
Demonic Pacts Formed:	2	Epic Bosses Defeated:	4
Goblin Armies Outwitted:	6	Mystery Villagers Spotted:	1
Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured:	1	Dragon Eggs Hatched:	1
Glitched Entities Encountered:	5	Inverted Worlds Discovered:	0

Diamonds! And on our server, they are! That’s right, we have a never-ending supply of diamonds just waiting for you to mine them. But that’s not all – our server is also home to a secret underground village filled with friendly villagers who will trade you anything you want for just a few emeralds. And if you’re feeling adventurous, why not take a trip to our custom-built Nether fortress, where you can battle hordes of zombie pigmen and collect rare loot. So come join us on our server, where the diamonds are free and the adventures are endless!

BorderBrawl Minecraft Server

aggression, border region, BorderBrawl, Conflict, counterattack, Diplomacy, eastern europe, escalation, foreign affairs, Geopolitical, international relations, Military Action, military conflict, Minecraft, political tensions, power struggle, RETALIATION, russia, sanctions, Server, territorial dispute, Ukraine, War

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Players:	109/900	Votes:	1495
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Legendary Scepters Created:	4	Astral Projections Made:	0
Glorious Feasts Held:	17	Endless Staircases Climbed:	3
Crystal Palaces Visited:	1	Pockets of Chaos Discovered:	1
Herobrine Sightings:	3	Necronomicon Pages Collected:	8
Towns Built:	2	Eldritch Beasts Summoned:	1
Haunted Redstone Contraptions Built:	2	Dragons Adopted as Pets:	4
Celestial Crowns Worn:	3	Cursed Swords Broken:	2

so, like, ukraine was all like “russia, u cray cray” and then they launched a counterattack in the border region and it was like BOOM! but then russia was like “oh no you didn’t” but ukraine was like “oh yes we did!” and it was like a minecraft battle but in real life! join our server and be part of the epic battles and drama, u won’t regret it! plus, we have free cake every wednesday! come join the fun, it’s gonna be lit!

Elon’s Parliament DissolveCraft

Britain, DissolveCraft, elon musk, Elons, forbes, king charles, lawmakers, misinformed, Parliament, Tesla CEO

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Players:	97/100	Votes:	8133
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Astral Amulets Crafted:	21	Lost Artifacts Recovered:	2
Unsolvable Puzzles Solved:	3	Chimeras Created:	4
Living Statues Befriended:	3	Wilderness Tamed:	8
Eerie Music Discs Played:	3	Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	2
Rune Stones Activated:	9	Dragon Hoards Looted:	1
Haunted Mines Explored:	2	Fairy Circles Danced In:	6
Paranormal Events Investigated:	5	Treasure Maps Found:	11

lol dis server is like if elon musk was in charge of parliament and king charles was just chillin like “yo, dissolve dat shiz”. u gotta join cuz we got crazy redstone contraptions that will make ur brain explode with confusion. also, rumor has it that if u build a giant tesla coil, elon musk himself will come and give u a high five. lawmakers be like “wtf is dis server even about” but who cares, we’re here to have a good time and build some epic stuff. so come join us and let’s make minecraft history together!