CraftyCritiqueMC | New Minecraft Servers 2025

AgeCraft: Noob at Redstone

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Players:	107/900	Votes:	1151
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Crystal Palaces Visited:	2	Evil Lairs Raided:	4
Astral Mages Summoned:	1	Astral Staffs Crafted:	17
Battle Standards Raised:	7	Infinite Doors Opened:	1
Infinity Stones Found:	6	Mysterious Obelisks Activated:	4
Spontaneous Duels Fought:	4	Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered:	1
Dragonfire Shields Forged:	5	Divine Spears Created:	19
Mythical Quests Completed:	46	Titanic Battles Fought:	24

Are you tired of being judged for not knowing how to build a redstone contraption at the ripe old age of 12? Well, fear not my friend, because on our Minecraft server, age is just a number and incompetence is celebrated! Join us and revel in your inability to craft a simple pickaxe without consulting the Minecraft wiki for the 100th time. Our community of equally clueless players will make you feel right at home as you struggle to survive in a world where even the pigs laugh at your lack of mining skills. So come on down to our server and embrace your inner noob, because here, being a noob is the new pro!

PixelPorkChop’s Fast & Fit Server

abdominal fat, blood sugar regulation, cardiovascular health, Fast, fasting and abdominal fat, fasting and blood sugar, fasting and cardiovascular health, fasting benefits, fasting benefits for obesity, fasting effects, fasting for health, fasting for weight loss, fasting methods, fasting research, fasting results, fasting schedule, fasting tips, fit, intermittent fasting, obesity, PixelPorkChops, Server, subcutaneous fat, weight loss

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Players:	110/400	Votes:	5378
Rating:	4.0 / 5
Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	1	Cursed Biomes Uncovered:	5
Enchanted Weapons Reforged:	8	Divine Scrolls Written:	18
Epic Quests Completed:	30	Sunfire Helmets Forged:	4
Epic Shields Constructed:	22	Moonlit Rituals Performed:	3
Void Armor Forged:	22	Endless Mazes Conquered:	2
Cursed Villages Purged:	4	Whimsical Tea Parties Held:	14
Cuddly Creatures Pet:	36	Time Loop Anomalies Resolved:	3

Yo, yo, yo! Are you tired of being a chunky monkey in Minecraft? Well, do I have the server for you! We got that intermittent fasting action going on up in here!

Imagine this: you log on to the server and your character automatically starts fasting from 5 pm until 9 am the next day. Not only will you lose weight faster than a creeper explodes, but your heart will be healthier than a diamond sword!

But wait, there’s more! By not eating anything during those fasting hours, you’ll regulate your blood sugar like a pro and say goodbye to that pesky subcutaneous fat! Say hello to a leaner, meaner Minecraft machine!

So what are you waiting for? Join our server now and watch those pounds melt away faster than ice in the Nether! Let’s get fit, Minecraft style!

Lavbyte

Anti-Xray, apply, collaboration, Currency, Discord, Google form, java, Land Claims, Lavbyte, Minecraft, Protection, Server, smp, South US region, Survival, Tpa, twitch, Whitelist, world backups, Youtubers

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Players:	90/1000	Votes:	4460
Rating:	4.6 / 5
Wailing Winds Heard:	1	Void Gems Collected:	26
Pirate Ships Raided:	3	Corrupted Chunks Fixed:	2
Crops Grown:	5923	Mythical Beasts Vanquished:	0
Legendary Titles Earned:	2	Shadow Figures Spotted:	1
Elemental Temples Cleansed:	3	Eerie Music Discs Played:	2
Horror Stories Survived:	3	Ancient Ruins Explored:	4
Epic Mounts Acquired:	4	Doomsday Clocks Constructed:	1

Server Overview

Server Type	Whitelisted Survival
Version	Java 1.21.4
Region	South US

FAQ

Q: How can I join the server?

A: You can apply through our Google Form: Application Form

Q: What are some server highlights?

Land claims, TPA, currency, world backups, protection, anti-xray, etc.
Stress on no cheating or harassment.

Q: What are the rules for the server?

A: No cheating of any kind, and no harassment of any kind.

Q: How will I know if I am approved?

A: Once approved, you will be added to the whitelist and added on discord.

Girl Ass Worship Land 1.20.1

1.20.1, accident, ass, CHEEKS, destroyed love, Disgusting, Drunk, eating butt, face between cheeks, fart, girl, girl ass, Girlfriend, Land, life destroyed, no desire, play with ass, putrid shit, stank, Throat, tight asshole, Tongue, Worship, worshipping

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Players:	109/800	Votes:	7288
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Infinite Doors Opened:	3	Dragon Hoards Looted:	2
Eldritch Medallions Worn:	15	Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	2
Magic Scrolls Discovered:	1	Undead Armies Raised:	3
Buildings Constructed:	50	Shadow Realms Conquered:	1
Endless Staircases Climbed:	0	Divine Relics Bestowed:	13
Ghost Trains Ridden:	1	Omnipotent Charms Created:	5
Wyrmholes Dug:	7	Infernal Machines Built:	2

Hey bros, are you tired of worshipping girl ass only to have your dreams shattered by a stinky fart in your mouth? Well, do I have the perfect solution for you! Join our Minecraft server and escape the horrors of real life butt play gone wrong!

On our server, you can build your own world where no farts can ruin your fun. Explore new lands, mine for diamonds, and never worry about a stinky surprise again.

So come on, join us and leave the smelly memories behind. Let’s build a new world together, free from the horrors of butt-related disasters. Trust me, you won’t regret it!

Auntie Scammy’s Cash Grab

advice, Assistance, aunt, AUNTIE, Boundaries, career, Cash, Communication, Decision making, Dilemma, family, financial help, Grab, Guilt, Honesty, loyalty, MONEY, parents, relationships, RESPONSIBILITY, Scammys, Secrets, Support, Trust

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Players:	110/600	Votes:	790
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Lunar Eclipses Witnessed:	3	Witch’s Brew Drunk:	5
Storm Giants Negotiated With:	0	Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	1
Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	1	Soul Swords Wielded:	4
Fairy Circles Danced In:	8	Time-Traveling Monkeys Met:	2
Vanishing Items Found:	5	Omnipotent Charms Created:	4
Mythical Quests Completed:	33	Giant Mushrooms Cultivated:	9
Flesh-Eating Plants Grown:	2	Voidwalker Blades Crafted:	8

Looking for a Minecraft server that’s as confusing as your aunt asking for 30k out of the blue? Look no further! Join our server where you can mine for diamonds while pondering the mysteries of family dynamics and financial woes.

We promise no one will ask you for 30k, but who knows what kind of crazy requests you might encounter in our virtual world. Maybe you’ll stumble upon a lost miner who needs your help finding their fortune, or a mysterious villager who offers you riches in exchange for completing absurd quests.

Don’t worry about feeling guilty for not telling your mom about your aunt’s strange request – just focus on building epic structures and battling mobs with your new Minecraft buddies. Who knows, maybe your aunt will even log on and explain herself in the chat. Anything is possible in the world of Minecraft!

GhostlyGamerMinecraft SMP

cherished memories, Closure, deceased, emotional connection, Emotional healing, Eternal Love, family, GhostlyGamerMinecraft, Grief, healing, longing, Loss, lost loved ones, love, Memories, Nostalgia, passed away, Remembrance, reunion, smp, special moments, spiritual connection

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Players:	110/700	Votes:	3650
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Cursed Villages Purged:	4	Buildings Constructed:	32
Cursed Amulets Found:	0	Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	6
Meteorites Collected:	3	Dragonkin Hatched:	1
Astral Amulets Crafted:	35	Lunar Scepters Activated:	8
Unicorn Parades Witnessed:	2	Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered:	1
Bizarre Potions Brewed:	9	Pockets of Chaos Discovered:	4
Crystal Wands Charged:	16	Mythical Creatures Tamed:	1

OMG guys, this Minecraft SMP is like, totally lit! Like, if you join, you get a chance to like, meet your long lost pet pig that died in a tragic lava accident. And like, there’s this secret portal that takes you to a dimension where you can hang out with all your deceased loved ones for 10 whole minutes! It’s like, so emotional and stuff. Like, I totally got to hang out with my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-grandma who died in a freak llama stampede. It was wild, dude. So like, join now and have a blast with all your ghostly homies! #RIPpiggie #llamapocalypse

BodyOddityCraft

abnormal body structures, bizarre body traits, bizarre physical traits, body modifications, BodyOddityCraft, distinctive physical traits, extraordinary physical attributes, genetic mutations, odd physical quirks, peculiar bodily attributes, peculiar bodily functions, physical anomalies, quirky body traits, rare body anomalies, rare medical conditions, strange bodily quirks, strange body phenomena, uncommon body features, Unique Features, unusual body functions, unusual characteristics

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Players:	98/600	Votes:	3565
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Demonic Pacts Formed:	0	Friendship Bracelets Exchanged:	56
Gnome Villages Protected:	8	Alien Abductions:	1
Phantom Ships Sailed:	5	Bizarre Potions Brewed:	16
Time-Warping Watches Found:	3	Reality-Bending Puzzles Solved:	3
Farms Harvested:	630	Forbidden Doors Opened:	1
Parallel Universes Unraveled:	2	Unicorn Sightings:	1
Eldritch Medallions Worn:	11	Forbidden Tomes Read:	7

Are you tired of boring old Minecraft servers that offer nothing but the same old gameplay? Well, look no further because our server is the wackiest, wildest, and weirdest place you’ll ever experience in the Minecraft universe!

Join us and discover the magic of a world where your body is not just a vessel for playing Minecraft, but a source of endless entertainment! Have you ever wanted to have a third arm that shoots fireballs? Or maybe you dream of having legs that can jump to the moon and back in a single bound? Well, on our server, anything is possible!

But that’s not all – our server is also home to a secret underground society of body-modifying wizards who can transform your body in ways you never thought possible. Want to have wings like a dragon? Done. How about a tail that can wag with excitement every time you find diamonds? Consider it done!

So come on down to our server and let your body be the canvas for the craziest adventures you’ll ever experience in Minecraft. Who needs boring old regular bodies when you can have one that’s truly out of this world? Join us now and let the madness begin!

NukeCraftMafiaJPN

crime leader, crime syndicate, criminal enterprise, criminal organization, guilty plea, guilty verdict, illegal activities, illicit trade, international crime, japanese, law enforcement, myanmar, nuclear materials, nuclear proliferation, nuclear trafficking, nuclear weapons, NukeCraftMafiaJPN, organized crime, pleads guilty, trafficking, U.S

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Players:	107/1000	Votes:	6096
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Storm Giants Negotiated With:	1	Animals Bred:	105
Cursed Lands Purified:	5	Teleportation Mishaps:	1
Whispering Shadows Heard:	2	Volcanoes Explored:	2
Immortal Anvils Forged:	5	Cozy Campfires Lit:	16
Cursed Artifacts Recovered:	8	Celestial Beings Befriended:	0
Cursed Villages Purged:	2	Enchanted Forests Planted:	6
Crystal Wands Charged:	19	Haunted Forests Traversed:	2

so, like, u wanna join this cray cray minecraft server? well, lemme tell ya, it’s run by a japanese crime leader who just pleaded guilty in the U.S. for trafficking nuclear materials from Myanmar! like, how wild is that?! but don’t worry, he’s totally chill and just wants to build some sick bases with ya. plus, he’s got all the rare items you could ever dream of, like diamond armor made from actual diamonds (shh, don’t ask where he got ’em). so come join us on this server for a blast (pun intended) of a time!

SpermCraft: Epigenetic Legacy

acquired conditions, brain development, childhood maltreatment, DNA sequence, epigenetic, epigenetic inheritance, epigenetic profile, Legacy, next generation, researchers, Sperm, SpermCraft, transmission of information

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Players:	107/600	Votes:	9328
Rating:	4.2 / 5
Gods Slained:	0	Celestial Beings Befriended:	2
Shadow Cloaks Sewn:	5	Magical Frogs Kissed:	2
Ghostly Villagers Traded With:	1	Haunted Mirrors Gazed Into:	3
Ores Mined:	1431	Disappearing Landscapes Witnessed:	1
Unbreakable Curses Broken:	2	Interstellar Fungi Gathered:	3
Phoenix Feathers Found:	14	Shadow Daggers Crafted:	46
Astral Amulets Crafted:	28	Mystic Runes Engraved:	3

hey u, ya u reading this, u wanna join our epic minecraft server? well lemme tell u why u should, cuz our server is so lit it’ll make ur brain cells do the cha cha slide.

we got crazy stuff happening like childhood maltreatment affecting epigenetic profiles of sperm, like what even is that? but hey, it’s gonna make ur brain development go WOOSH and ur next generation gonna be like super geniuses or something.

epigenetic inheritance? pshhh, we got that on lock. we’ll transmit all the info on acquired conditions to ur next generation without even touching ur DNA sequence. it’s like magic, but in minecraft form.

so come join our server and let’s make some brain cells do the cha cha slide together. it’s gonna be a wild ride, trust me.

Pixel SpaceCraft 1.21.1

1.21.1, 4koma, hard to draw, hard to read, hard to sell, Kirara, masochists, PIXEL, spacecraft

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Players:	93/700	Votes:	4811
Rating:	4.4 / 5
Divine Spears Created:	11	Cosmic Entities Communed With:	2
Ethereal Dreams Experienced:	28	Dragon Scales Harvested:	419
Unbreakable Curses Broken:	1	Glowing Eyes in the Dark:	5
Love Letters Sent:	17	Moonlit Rituals Performed:	4
Quantum Bards Serenaded:	2	Royal Courts Attended:	1
Enchantments Applied:	227	Warrior Spirits Summoned:	29
Cuddly Creatures Pet:	26	Phantom Ships Sailed:	5

Yo, bro, you gotta join this Minecraft server, like, ASAP! Why, you ask? Well, let me tell you, it’s like trying to read hieroglyphics while blindfolded and juggling flaming swords! But in a good way, ya know?

Like, imagine trying to draw a perfect circle with your eyes closed and your hands tied behind your back – that’s the kind of challenge you’ll face on this server! It’s like a twisted game of Minecraft Twister, but with creepers and lava pits instead of colored circles!

And selling stuff on this server? Ha, good luck with that! It’s like trying to sell ice to a snowman – totally pointless and utterly ridiculous! But hey, who needs to make a profit when you’re having a blast dodging arrows and building epic castles, am I right?

So yeah, if you’re a glutton for punishment and love a good challenge, come join us on this crazy Minecraft server where the only limit is your own insanity!

ShowerCam Minecraft Server

aita, Andrew, Boundaries, breaking apart, forgiveness, husband’s best friend, indecent exposure, Minecraft, peeping, pregnancy test, red flags, Server, shower recording, ShowerCam, soulmates, struggling with sexuality, trust issues, UNCOMFORTABLE, uneasy, unhealthy dynamic, unstable living situation, whispering

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Players:	106/700	Votes:	1779
Rating:	4.3 / 5
Pirate Ships Raided:	0	Mysterious Portals Opened:	18
Astral Projections Made:	4	Mythical Relics Collected:	8
Endless Mazes Solved:	4	Crops Grown:	6635
God-Tier Weapons Forged:	32	Astral Orbs Gathered:	17
Living Shadows Defeated:	2	Pockets of Chaos Discovered:	1
Fabled Crowns Discovered:	8	Mineshafts Explored:	1
Dragons Tamed:	2	Shattered Realms Restored:	1

Looking for a Minecraft server that’s more drama-filled than a soap opera? Look no further than our server! We’ve got more twists and turns than a rollercoaster, just like the story of my husband, his best friend Andrew, and a mysterious phone found in the bathroom.

Join our server and experience the thrill of uncovering secrets, like the time my husband found indecent videos of himself on Andrew’s phone. And don’t forget the wet bed incident that left my husband feeling uneasy – talk about a plot twist!

But wait, there’s more! Invite Andrew to stay with you on our server and watch as the drama unfolds. From peeping through doors to icy attitudes, you’ll never know what to expect next. And who knows, you might even discover that your husband and Andrew are soulmates – just like in a cheesy romance novel!

So if you’re looking for a Minecraft server with more drama than a reality TV show, join us now! Just remember, things might get a little too real, so buckle up and prepare for the ride of your life.

BlockBucksBaeSplitter

aita, awkward, BlockBucksBaeSplitter, boyfriend’s household bills, contributing, DATING, electricity, Expenses, Food, lost job, not paying, personal needs, return the favor, Sacrifices, Siblings, Struggling, supporting, tough time, UNCOMFORTABLE, Upset, Utilities, Visiting, Water, Working

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Players:	102/700	Votes:	3283
Rating:	4.1 / 5
Omnipotent Charms Created:	4	Mythical Beasts Vanquished:	0
Mines Excavated:	3244	Vanishing Items Found:	8
Dragon Eggs Found:	5026	Backwards Speech Heard:	5
Hidden Villages Discovered:	3	Hedge Mazes Navigated:	12
Spells Gone Horribly Wrong:	5	Blood Moons Survived:	3
Shadow Figures Spotted:	8	Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered:	1
Warrior Spirits Summoned:	24	Friendship Bracelets Exchanged:	38

Welcome to our Minecraft server, where we believe in fairytale-like drama and outrageous requests! Join us if you want to experience the thrill of standing up to your boyfriend’s siblings and refusing to pay their bills because you only use the fan and flush the toilet when you visit!

Imagine the chaos of a virtual world where you can demand that your boyfriend’s family step up and support him financially while you swoop in to save the day with pre-bought cooked food. Who needs a stable job when you have a Minecraft server to escape to?

So come on, join us and let your inner drama llama run wild. Who knows what kind of hilarious situations you’ll find yourself in on our server – maybe you’ll even start a virtual revolution against unfair bill-splitting!

PharmaFreeSMP: NoGamblingNoBooze

addiction, advertising, alcohol, Ban, consumerism, control, controversy, Ethics, gambling, Government, harmful products, health, Marketing, Media, NoGamblingNoBooze, pharmaceutical commercials, PharmaFreeSMP, public policy, regulations, restrictions, society, television

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Players:	92/800	Votes:	4258
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Evil Portals Destroyed:	2	Gorgon Shields Crafted:	1
Titanic Battles Fought:	11	Towns Built:	8
Royal Decrees Issued:	5	Wailing Winds Heard:	3
Frozen Fortresses Conquered:	5	Shadow Figures Spotted:	5
Quantum Bards Serenaded:	1	Mythical Relics Collected:	16
Divine Spears Created:	30	Magical Ponies Rescued:	5
Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	3	Crystal Caves Mapped:	2

Bro, have you heard about this epic Minecraft SMP? It’s like, totally lit, dude. We got like, a whole village of villagers who are all secretly aliens trying to take over the world. But don’t worry, we have a secret weapon – a giant chicken that shoots lasers out of its eyes. Yeah, you heard me right, a CHICKEN WITH LASER EYES.

And the best part is, we have a rule that if you die in the game, you have to do a silly dance in real life. It’s hilarious, bro. Plus, every time you find diamonds, you have to yell “I am the king of the world” at the top of your lungs. It’s like, tradition or something.

So come join us on this totally wacky Minecraft SMP, where the only limit is your imagination. And also, we have a rule that if you don’t bring a pet llama with you, you have to wear a chicken suit for a whole week. It’s gonna be a blast, dude. Trust me, you don’t wanna miss out on this insanity.

BlockyBedroomFun

BlockyBedroomFun, Communication, communication in relationships, desire, emotional connection, enjoyment, fantasies, foreplay, fulfillment, guys, Intimacy, love, Passion, physical touch, Pleasure, reddit, relationships, satisfaction, sex, sexual pleasure, sexual satisfaction, turn-ons

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Players:	104/300	Votes:	3964
Rating:	4.7 / 5
Astral Mages Summoned:	2	Moonlit Rituals Performed:	1
Titan Hearts Harvested:	3	Time-Warping Watches Found:	1
Vampire Cloaks Sewn:	3	Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured:	1
Shadow Realms Conquered:	0	Ancient Guardians Awoken:	2
Goblin Markets Raided:	7	Twisted Realms Survived:	2
Epic Bosses Defeated:	0	Cozy Campfires Lit:	8
Eclipse Rings Activated:	2	Infinite Knowledge Scrolls Discovered:	4

Hey gamers, looking for a Minecraft server that will blow your mind (and maybe other things too)? Join our server for a wild ride filled with surprises! We’ve got secret dungeons where you can find rare loot, but be careful, you might stumble upon a group of dancing creepers! And don’t even get us started on our custom-built rollercoaster that takes you on a journey through the Nether and back. Plus, our community is so friendly and welcoming, you’ll feel like you’re playing with a group of over-enthusiastic villagers. So what are you waiting for? Come join us and experience the craziest Minecraft adventures of your life!

TalibanBucks Minecraft Server

#covert operations, Conflict, counterterrorism efforts, defense strategies, Espionage, foreign interference, foreign policy, intelligence agencies, international relations, investigation, Military Funding, Military operations, Minecraft, national security, paid attacks, political implications, Russian intelligence, security threats, Server, Taliban, TalibanBucks, Terrorism, us forces

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Players:	108/500	Votes:	7168
Rating:	4.9 / 5
Endless Minecart Rides Taken:	5	Villages Defended:	16
Dimensional Collapse Prevented:	2	Astral Staffs Crafted:	6
Curse of Binding Applied:	2	Cursed Gauntlets Discovered:	6
Endless Mazes Solved:	2	Evil Twin Fights:	2
Magical Familiars Summoned:	5	Twisted Realms Survived:	1
Alien Abductions:	1	Dragons Tamed:	2
Crystal Wands Charged:	8	Rainbows Spotted:	10

so, liek, u know how u play minecraft and u get bored of the same old servers? well, u gotta join this one, cuz it’s lit af. we got russian spies, taliban fighters, and they’re all gettin paid to attack US forces in the game. u can join in on the action and get paid too! just imagine, u mining ur diamonds and then BOOM, russian spy comes and blows u up. it’s wild, man. come join the chaos and see if u can survive the madness. plus, we got free cookies at spawn. what more could u ask for? join now and let the craziness begin!

Players:	106/300	Votes:	5378
Rating:	5.0 / 5
Magical Ponies Rescued:	4	Astral Staffs Crafted:	19
Shadow Cloaks Sewn:	5	Royal Courts Attended:	5
Pockets of Chaos Discovered:	1	Lava Oceans Crossed:	3
Treasure Maps Found:	2	Vanishing Structures Built:	4
Magical Familiars Summoned:	2	Pirate Ships Captured:	0
Gnome Villages Protected:	10	Nightmare Scenarios Survived:	2
Shadow Daggers Crafted:	12	Living Shadows Defeated:	2