We hope you will join us on the server and in our Discord.
| Players: | 101/200 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.1 / 5 | ||
| Ether Blades Crafted: | 18 | Unholy Rituals Interrupted: | 0 |
| Evil Portals Destroyed: | 1 | Cosmic Entities Communed With: | 0 |
| Immortal Potions Brewed: | 14 | Eldritch Beasts Summoned: | 3 |
| Pirate Ships Captured: | 2 | Hidden Sanctuaries Discovered: | 1 |
| Runes Activated: | 0 | Secret Guilds Joined: | 1 |
Random Fact: Whimsy Alert: Zombie dances are the number one pastime here!
Join us and avoid getting dicked around by re-tart hillbillies. We offer a safe haven for all ostriches and sand-heads looking to escape the chaos of the outside world. Plus, our server is located on a giant body of water for easy transport and trade…because who needs roads when you have boats?
So come on over and join the fun, because nothing says “successful empire” like a bunch of Minecraft players building a white ethnostate together. Don’t miss out on the opportunity to be part of something truly outrageous!
| Players: | 102/800 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.6 / 5 | ||
| Eternal Flames Captured: | 7 | Chaos Gates Opened: | 3 |
| Magic Wands Crafted: | 19 | Nether Portals Gone Wrong: | 3 |
| Mystery Villagers Spotted: | 3 | Mystical Amulets Crafted: | 35 |
| Rainbows Spotted: | 8 | Reality Distortions Fixed: | 2 |
| Ethereal Couriers Hired: | 4 | Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered: | 1 |
Random Fact: Magical Fact: A player once brewed a potion that turned their pet into a talking companion—it always knows just what to say.
Picture this: you’re peacefully mining for diamonds when suddenly a wild herd of llamas appears and starts a dance party. Or how about the time we all decided to build a giant statue of a potato just because?
But wait, there’s more! Rumor has it that our server is home to a secret underground society of chicken overlords who are plotting to take over the world. Will you join forces with them or fight against their feathery tyranny?
So come on, what are you waiting for? Join our SMP today and become part of the most ridiculous, hilarious, and downright bizarre Minecraft community out there. Let’s show those Berylbros who’s boss!
| Players: | 93/600 | Uptime: | 99% |
| Rating: | 4.9 / 5 | ||
| Villages Defended: | 10 | Infinity Gauntlets Forged: | 0 |
| Orbs of Power Found: | 6 | Omnipotent Charms Created: | 5 |
| Volcanoes Explored: | 2 | Titan Hearts Harvested: | 2 |
| Legendary Titles Earned: | 1 | Eldritch Scrolls Read: | 4 |
| Moonlit Rituals Performed: | 1 | Farms Harvested: | 974 |
Random Fact: Sweet Truth: A player found a hidden passage that leads to a secret garden—it’s full of flowers that bloom in rainbow colors.
Our server is so crazy, even your PT friend might join in on the fun! Who knows, maybe you’ll stumble upon a secret PT jerk-off club in one of our virtual worlds.
But don’t worry, we promise it’s all just a joke! Just like your boyfriend’s excuses for his inappropriate behavior. So come join us and see why getting into arguments over PT jokes is just the beginning of the insanity on our server.
| Players: | 95/1000 | Uptime: | 95% |
| Rating: | 4.0 / 5 | ||
| Invisible Walls Found: | 2 | Zeus’s Thunderbolts Captured: | 1 |
| Crops Grown: | 6405 | Divine Scrolls Written: | 25 |
| Magical Moments Shared: | 22 | Gods Slained: | 1 |
| Flesh-Eating Plants Grown: | 1 | Celestial Events Witnessed: | 3 |
| Titanic Battles Fought: | 22 | Phantom Knights Defeated: | 3 |
Random Fact: Insider Scoop: Whispering shadows are known to hum lullabies when no one’s listening.
Join us for a wild ride filled with explosive creeper pranks, diamond-stealing shenanigans, and epic battles with the Ender Dragon (who may or may not have a secret crush on one of our admins).
But wait, there’s more! We have a secret underground base filled with enchanted golden apples, a rollercoaster that goes through the Nether, and a pet pig named Sir Oinksalot who wears a top hat and monocle.
So what are you waiting for? Join us now and say goodbye to regret, because on our server, the only thing you’ll regret is not joining sooner!
| Players: | 104/1000 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.5 / 5 | ||
| Reality Warps Survived: | 2 | Teleportation Mishaps: | 1 |
| Herobrine Sightings: | 10 | Epic Weapons Forged: | 3 |
| World-Altering Spells Cast: | 2 | Infinite Doors Opened: | 2 |
| Dungeon Sieges Launched: | 6 | Ancient Ruins Explored: | 5 |
| Bizarre Potions Brewed: | 7 | Horror Stories Survived: | 3 |
Random Fact: Lovely Lore: A friendship bracelet once turned into a glowing beacon—now it lights the way for adventurers at night.
Join us for a wild ride through a world where diamonds rain from the sky, creepers do the cha-cha, and the Ender Dragon is actually just a misunderstood puppy looking for belly rubs.
But wait, there’s more! Our server is home to the legendary Blocktopus, a creature made entirely of TNT and obsidian who roams the land, challenging players to epic build battles for the chance to win a lifetime supply of virtual cookies.
So if you’re ready to experience the craziest, most unpredictable Minecraft server in existence, come join us and prepare for a gaming experience like no other. Just be sure to bring your sense of humor and a healthy dose of imagination – you’re gonna need it!
| Players: | 98/500 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.2 / 5 | ||
| Magical Ponies Rescued: | 2 | Void Armor Forged: | 18 |
| Celestial Dragons Tamed: | 3 | Evil Lairs Raided: | 4 |
| Magical Moments Shared: | 8 | Duplicated Mobs Battled: | 3 |
| Endless Staircases Climbed: | 0 | Runes Activated: | 2 |
| Haunted Forests Traversed: | 7 | Flesh-Eating Plants Grown: | 4 |
Random Fact: Surprising But True: The last rainstorm ended with a double rainbow and a pot of gold—it’s now a community treasure.
In other news, all legacy/java/Mojang accounts have been brutally murdered. But fear not, you can still play the game without a Microsoft account using our top-secret links!
Need mods? We got ’em! Want optimization mods? We got those too! Got shafted by M$ and can’t authenticate your server? We have a solution for that too!
Join us for a wild ride through the forest of mods, inspiration, and general shenanigans. And hey, if you’re lucky, you might even stumble upon one of our secret servers like PFAA or Reikapack. It’s a jungle out there, but we promise it’s worth it!
| Players: | 102/800 | Uptime: | 97% |
| Rating: | 4.7 / 5 | ||
| Celestial Blades Sharpened: | 14 | Gnome Villages Protected: | 6 |
| Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered: | 1 | Reality-Warping Charms Crafted: | 4 |
| Ender Pearl Glitches: | 1 | Whispering Shadows Heard: | 5 |
| Chaos Orbs Controlled: | 9 | Dragon Hoards Looted: | 2 |
| Spells Gone Horribly Wrong: | 9 | Rainbows Spotted: | 7 |
Random Fact: Wholesome Truth: A player discovered a hidden cave full of glowing crystals—it’s now a popular spot for quiet reflection and wonder.
| Players: | 110/800 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.2 / 5 | ||
| Interdimensional Bake Sales Hosted: | 3 | Mythical Beasts Vanquished: | 4 |
| Backwards Speech Heard: | 3 | Living Shadows Defeated: | 3 |
| Legendary Heroes Trained: | 5 | Parallel Universes Unraveled: | 0 |
| Magical Carpet Rides Taken: | 6 | Sunfire Helmets Forged: | 7 |
| Doomsday Clocks Constructed: | 1 | Farms Harvested: | 596 |
Random Fact: Magical Fact: A player once brewed a potion that turned their pet into a talking companion—it always knows just what to say.
Join our insane Minecraft SMP where the worst pain you’ve ever felt is not from falling into lava or getting blown up by a creeper, but from laughing so hard at the ridiculous shenanigans that go down on our server.
From epic pranks that will leave you questioning your sanity to intense PvP battles that will have you on the edge of your seat, this server is not for the faint of heart. But hey, who needs a boring old survival experience when you can have a wild ride filled with chaos and laughter?
So come on, join us and see what crazy adventures await you on our one-of-a-kind Minecraft SMP. Just be prepared to have your sides hurting from all the laughter!
| Players: | 99/500 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 5.0 / 5 | ||
| Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered: | 1 | Wilderness Tamed: | 16 |
| Legendary Scepters Created: | 8 | Demonic Pacts Formed: | 1 |
| Endless Mazes Conquered: | 2 | Haunted Strongholds Conquered: | 5 |
| Dragon Eggs Found: | 1657 | Phantom Horses Ridden: | 3 |
| Astral Staffs Crafted: | 5 | Godly Talismans Bestowed: | 12 |
Random Fact: Cute Fact: A player found a baby dragon who thinks it’s a puppy—it even fetches sticks (and sometimes small trees).
| Players: | 101/900 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.7 / 5 | ||
| Infinity Gauntlets Forged: | 1 | Undead Armies Raised: | 2 |
| Mythical Swords Crafted: | 46 | Magical Ponies Rescued: | 7 |
| Mystic Mirrors Unlocked: | 1 | Endless Legions Commanded: | 29 |
| Epic Bosses Defeated: | 4 | Dragon Eggs Found: | 7626 |
| Fabled Crowns Discovered: | 2 | Necronomicon Pages Collected: | 5 |
Random Fact: Did You Hear? A player once brewed a potion that made their pet bunny fly—it’s now the most popular bunny in the skies.
| Players: | 92/600 | Uptime: | 95% |
| Rating: | 4.0 / 5 | ||
| Corrupted Chunks Fixed: | 2 | Love Letters Sent: | 10 |
| Ether Blades Crafted: | 4 | Chaos Emeralds Discovered: | 4 |
| Unbreakable Curses Broken: | 1 | Ender Chest Mysteries Uncovered: | 3 |
| Rune Stones Activated: | 4 | Void Armor Forged: | 22 |
| Mysterious Portals Opened: | 20 | Whimsical Tea Parties Held: | 14 |
Random Fact: Magical Moment: The last tea party held in the enchanted forest had talking teacups—they love to chat about the weather.
like, u can have grape seedlings that are like super strong and can handle salt stress like a boss. imagine having a grape farm that’s like immune to all da haters tryna mess with ur crops.
join dis server for da most epic grape-growing experience of ur life. u won’t regret it, trust me. it’s like a whole new level of minecraft farming, but with grapes. grapes, man. grapes.
| Players: | 96/1000 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.5 / 5 | ||
| Epic Mounts Acquired: | 6 | Evil Portals Destroyed: | 1 |
| Arcane Secrets Unlocked: | 5 | Lunar Scepters Activated: | 11 |
| Hidden Passages Discovered: | 3 | Ores Mined: | 7499 |
| Legendary Armor Sets Assembled: | 44 | Fabled Crowns Discovered: | 9 |
| Invisible Walls Found: | 1 | Haunted Strongholds Conquered: | 5 |
Random Fact: Magical Moment: A player once planted a tree that grew a swing—it’s now the best spot for relaxing with friends.
But that’s not all – our server is also home to a secret underground society of talking chickens who have formed their own government. Will you join forces with them or challenge their rule? The choice is yours!
So why waste time getting a real driver’s license when you can have all the fun and excitement right here on our server? Join now and start your wild Minecraft adventure today!
| Players: | 96/800 | Uptime: | 97% |
| Rating: | 4.3 / 5 | ||
| Magical Beanstalks Grown: | 3 | Gryphons Tamed: | 4 |
| Glowing Eyes in the Dark: | 2 | Wizards Turned into Frogs: | 0 |
| Emeralds Found: | 9833 | Mystical Artifacts Crafted: | 14 |
| Glorious Feasts Held: | 16 | Talking Trees Consulted: | 6 |
| Demonic Pacts Formed: | 3 | Enchanted Armories Found: | 2 |
Random Fact: Wholesome Truth: A player discovered a hidden cave full of glowing crystals—it’s now a popular spot for quiet reflection and wonder.
Do you want to build a giant potato statue of yourself in the middle of a lava lake? We got you covered. Want to ride a pig dressed as a cowboy while shooting arrows at creepers? Absolutely doable. The possibilities are endless in this wacky world of blocky adventures.
But beware, we have a strict policy of only allowing players who can juggle with TNT while riding a unicycle. So if you think you have what it takes to survive in this crazy realm, join us and show off your skills.
And remember, our motto is to bully seaniggers, discord trannies, bugmen, /v/ermins, dramaniggers, tourists, retards & degenerates, so be prepared to embrace the chaos and have a blast. See you in the game, but only if you’re ready for the wildest ride of your Minecraft life!
| Players: | 100/800 | Uptime: | 95% |
| Rating: | 4.1 / 5 | ||
| Cursed Villages Purged: | 4 | Lava Oceans Crossed: | 1 |
| Secret Passages Found: | 8 | Ghostly Villagers Traded With: | 3 |
| Lunar Scepters Activated: | 4 | Endless Night Skies: | 4 |
| Lost Cities Unearthed: | 1 | Mystery Villagers Spotted: | 2 |
| Enchanted Tomes Discovered: | 103 | Astral Projections Made: | 3 |
Random Fact: Surprising But True: The last rainstorm ended with a double rainbow and a pot of gold—it’s now a community treasure.
Imagine this: you’re mining for diamonds when suddenly, a group of players approaches you and asks for your in-game number. You politely decline, stating that you’re only interested in mining and crafting. But wait, they insist that their friend, who happens to be a creeper in disguise, has a crush on you! They argue that since the creeper identifies as a player, it’s totally cool for you to date them.
Luckily, your trusty Minecraft buddy, let’s call them Steve, swoops in to save the day. Steve reminds you that you’re not obligated to date anyone you’re not interested in, whether they’re a zombie, skeleton, or even a dragon in human form. But then, another player named Lily pops up and accuses you of being transphobic for not giving the creeper a chance. The drama unfolds as you navigate through the complexities of love and friendship in the pixelated world of Minecraft.
So why join our server? Because where else can you experience such absurd and hilarious scenarios while building your own virtual world? Come join us and let the chaos begin!
| Players: | 92/800 | Uptime: | 95% |
| Rating: | 4.2 / 5 | ||
| Infinity Stones Found: | 4 | Haunted Redstone Contraptions Built: | 4 |
| Elemental Crystals Collected: | 28 | Enchanted Tomes Discovered: | 90 |
| Gods Slained: | 0 | Eldritch Beasts Summoned: | 1 |
| Magical Carpet Rides Taken: | 5 | Herobrine Sightings: | 7 |
| Endless Minecart Rides Taken: | 5 | Pirate Ghost Ships Conquered: | 2 |
Random Fact: Sweet Truth: Someone accidentally turned their cat into a living plushie—it’s now the softest thing on the server.
