| Players: | 96/100 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.9 / 5 | ||
| Chaos Orbs Controlled: | 21 | Gods Slained: | 1 |
| Mineshafts Explored: | 3 | Reality-Warping Charms Crafted: | 1 |
| Unseen Monsters Slain: | 6 | Whispering Caves Entered: | 8 |
| Cursed Villages Purged: | 3 | Nether Portals Gone Wrong: | 4 |
| Mythical Creatures Tamed: | 1 | Ender Pearl Glitches: | 3 |
Random Fact: Sweet Truth: A player found a hidden passage that leads to a secret garden—it’s full of flowers that bloom in rainbow colors.
Join us and avoid getting dicked around by re-tart hillbillies. We offer a safe haven for all ostriches and sand-heads looking to escape the chaos of the outside world. Plus, our server is located on a giant body of water for easy transport and trade…because who needs roads when you have boats?
So come on over and join the fun, because nothing says “successful empire” like a bunch of Minecraft players building a white ethnostate together. Don’t miss out on the opportunity to be part of something truly outrageous!
| Players: | 95/600 | Uptime: | 97% |
| Rating: | 4.4 / 5 | ||
| Necronomicon Pages Collected: | 8 | Enchantments Applied: | 183 |
| Demon Skulls Collected: | 21 | Meteorites Collected: | 3 |
| Warlock Pacts Sealed: | 3 | Wishing Wells Wished Upon: | 4 |
| Dragon Eggs Found: | 3516 | Lunar Eclipses Witnessed: | 1 |
| Immortal Potions Brewed: | 7 | Gorgon Shields Crafted: | 3 |
Random Fact: Fun Fact: A catgirl once traded her friendship bracelet for an ancient relic—best decision ever.
Picture this: you’re peacefully mining for diamonds when suddenly a wild herd of llamas appears and starts a dance party. Or how about the time we all decided to build a giant statue of a potato just because?
But wait, there’s more! Rumor has it that our server is home to a secret underground society of chicken overlords who are plotting to take over the world. Will you join forces with them or fight against their feathery tyranny?
So come on, what are you waiting for? Join our SMP today and become part of the most ridiculous, hilarious, and downright bizarre Minecraft community out there. Let’s show those Berylbros who’s boss!
| Players: | 91/100 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.9 / 5 | ||
| Magic Wands Crafted: | 21 | Mimic Chests Discovered: | 5 |
| Ghostly Villagers Traded With: | 4 | Voidwalker Blades Crafted: | 4 |
| Dragonfire Shields Forged: | 5 | Ethereal Couriers Hired: | 5 |
| Secret Passages Found: | 6 | Lunar Eclipses Witnessed: | 3 |
| Divine Relics Bestowed: | 11 | Enchanted Tomes Discovered: | 155 |
Random Fact: Did you hear? The most powerful magic item found this week was a spoon that can bend reality.
Our server is so crazy, even your PT friend might join in on the fun! Who knows, maybe you’ll stumble upon a secret PT jerk-off club in one of our virtual worlds.
But don’t worry, we promise it’s all just a joke! Just like your boyfriend’s excuses for his inappropriate behavior. So come join us and see why getting into arguments over PT jokes is just the beginning of the insanity on our server.
| Players: | 99/100 | Uptime: | 97% |
| Rating: | 4.3 / 5 | ||
| Magical Carpet Rides Taken: | 3 | Legendary Armor Sets Assembled: | 49 |
| Epic Battles Fought: | 8 | Titan Hearts Harvested: | 2 |
| Warrior Spirits Summoned: | 37 | Players Killed by Monsters: | 2644 |
| Necronomicon Pages Collected: | 4 | Glorious Feasts Held: | 16 |
| Ender Pearl Glitches: | 1 | Forbidden Grimoires Read: | 5 |
Random Fact: Adorable Fact: Someone discovered a magical beanstalk that grows lollipops—it’s become the server’s favorite snack source.
Join us for a wild ride filled with explosive creeper pranks, diamond-stealing shenanigans, and epic battles with the Ender Dragon (who may or may not have a secret crush on one of our admins).
But wait, there’s more! We have a secret underground base filled with enchanted golden apples, a rollercoaster that goes through the Nether, and a pet pig named Sir Oinksalot who wears a top hat and monocle.
So what are you waiting for? Join us now and say goodbye to regret, because on our server, the only thing you’ll regret is not joining sooner!
| Players: | 96/400 | Uptime: | 98% |
| Rating: | 5.0 / 5 | ||
| Leprechaun Gold Stolen: | 2 | Wizards Turned into Frogs: | 1 |
| Magical Ponies Rescued: | 5 | Cryptic Prophecies Deciphered: | 3 |
| Bizarre Potions Brewed: | 17 | Gnome Villages Protected: | 9 |
| Nether Portals Gone Wrong: | 4 | Parallel Universes Unraveled: | 2 |
| Haunted Mines Explored: | 1 | Love Letters Sent: | 13 |
Random Fact: Heartwarming Fact: A player once found a cozy campfire that tells bedtime stories—perfect for winding down after a day of quests.
Join us for a wild ride through a world where diamonds rain from the sky, creepers do the cha-cha, and the Ender Dragon is actually just a misunderstood puppy looking for belly rubs.
But wait, there’s more! Our server is home to the legendary Blocktopus, a creature made entirely of TNT and obsidian who roams the land, challenging players to epic build battles for the chance to win a lifetime supply of virtual cookies.
So if you’re ready to experience the craziest, most unpredictable Minecraft server in existence, come join us and prepare for a gaming experience like no other. Just be sure to bring your sense of humor and a healthy dose of imagination – you’re gonna need it!
| Players: | 92/1000 | Uptime: | 95% |
| Rating: | 4.9 / 5 | ||
| Werewolf Howls Heard: | 3 | Gnome Villages Protected: | 9 |
| Secret Libraries Discovered: | 1 | Portal Loops Escaped: | 0 |
| Immortal Potions Brewed: | 14 | Elemental Temples Cleansed: | 1 |
| Invisible Pathways Walked: | 7 | Arcane Towers Raised: | 2 |
| Buildings Constructed: | 6 | Cosmic Entities Communed With: | 2 |
Random Fact: Magical Moment: The last tea party held in the enchanted forest had talking teacups—they love to chat about the weather.
In other news, all legacy/java/Mojang accounts have been brutally murdered. But fear not, you can still play the game without a Microsoft account using our top-secret links!
Need mods? We got ’em! Want optimization mods? We got those too! Got shafted by M$ and can’t authenticate your server? We have a solution for that too!
Join us for a wild ride through the forest of mods, inspiration, and general shenanigans. And hey, if you’re lucky, you might even stumble upon one of our secret servers like PFAA or Reikapack. It’s a jungle out there, but we promise it’s worth it!
| Players: | 109/700 | Uptime: | 95% |
| Rating: | 4.6 / 5 | ||
| Divine Spears Created: | 11 | Phantom Ships Sailed: | 2 |
| Immortal Potions Brewed: | 11 | Endless Mazes Solved: | 2 |
| Hidden Sanctuaries Discovered: | 3 | Warrior Spirits Summoned: | 10 |
| Infinity Gauntlets Forged: | 1 | Spectral Entities Defeated: | 4 |
| Eternal Flames Captured: | 7 | Mimic Chests Discovered: | 5 |
Random Fact: Magical Fact: Someone once enchanted their fireplace to tell bedtime stories—now it’s the coziest spot in any house.
| Players: | 93/400 | Uptime: | 97% |
| Rating: | 4.3 / 5 | ||
| Hidden Villages Discovered: | 3 | Soul Contracts Signed: | 4 |
| Alternate Realities Explored: | 3 | Eldritch Scrolls Read: | 3 |
| Disappearing Landscapes Witnessed: | 2 | Arcane Towers Raised: | 4 |
| Wilderness Tamed: | 15 | Animals Bred: | 117 |
| Friendship Bracelets Exchanged: | 47 | Eerie Music Discs Played: | 3 |
Random Fact: Did You Hear? A player accidentally enchanted their bed to sing lullabies—now they fall asleep faster than ever.
Join our insane Minecraft SMP where the worst pain you’ve ever felt is not from falling into lava or getting blown up by a creeper, but from laughing so hard at the ridiculous shenanigans that go down on our server.
From epic pranks that will leave you questioning your sanity to intense PvP battles that will have you on the edge of your seat, this server is not for the faint of heart. But hey, who needs a boring old survival experience when you can have a wild ride filled with chaos and laughter?
So come on, join us and see what crazy adventures await you on our one-of-a-kind Minecraft SMP. Just be prepared to have your sides hurting from all the laughter!
| Players: | 108/700 | Uptime: | 100% |
| Rating: | 4.6 / 5 | ||
| Falling into the Void: | 0 | Divine Scrolls Written: | 23 |
| Wailing Winds Heard: | 4 | Ancient Relics Unearthed: | 380 |
| Hidden Villages Discovered: | 3 | Cursed Statues Activated: | 3 |
| Powerful Allies Recruited: | 8 | Forgotten Legends Remembered: | 9 |
| Voidwalker Blades Crafted: | 4 | Eldritch Abominations Befriended: | 0 |
Random Fact: Did you know? The most recent world-altering spell accidentally turned a mountain into a giant chocolate cake.
| Players: | 109/900 | Uptime: | 97% |
| Rating: | 4.7 / 5 | ||
| Infinite Doors Opened: | 3 | Celestial Events Witnessed: | 3 |
| Titanic Battles Fought: | 15 | Astral Amulets Crafted: | 31 |
| Quantum Bards Serenaded: | 4 | Hidden Sanctuaries Discovered: | 2 |
| Cursed Statues Activated: | 4 | Mythical Quests Completed: | 33 |
| Dimensional Rifts Closed: | 0 | Shadow Wolves Tamed: | 3 |
Random Fact: Did you know? When a reality-bending puzzle is solved, it sometimes turns nearby players into walking marshmallows.
| Players: | 103/100 | Uptime: | 95% |
| Rating: | 4.3 / 5 | ||
| Ancient Relics Unearthed: | 418 | Cursed Taverns Survived: | 3 |
| Forbidden Doors Opened: | 2 | Werewolf Howls Heard: | 2 |
| Soulbound Rings Equipped: | 5 | Glitched Entities Encountered: | 1 |
| Dimension-Hopping Bunnies Found: | 3 | Demonic Pacts Formed: | 1 |
| Moonlit Rituals Performed: | 4 | Chaos Orbs Controlled: | 20 |
Random Fact: Cute Fact: A player found a baby dragon who thinks it’s a puppy—it even fetches sticks (and sometimes small trees).
like, u can have grape seedlings that are like super strong and can handle salt stress like a boss. imagine having a grape farm that’s like immune to all da haters tryna mess with ur crops.
join dis server for da most epic grape-growing experience of ur life. u won’t regret it, trust me. it’s like a whole new level of minecraft farming, but with grapes. grapes, man. grapes.
| Players: | 96/700 | Uptime: | 98% |
| Rating: | 4.4 / 5 | ||
| Towns Built: | 5 | Celestial Crowns Worn: | 5 |
| Buildings Constructed: | 47 | Dragons Adopted as Pets: | 3 |
| Quantum Bards Serenaded: | 4 | Dimensional Rifts Closed: | 4 |
| Pockets of Chaos Discovered: | 1 | Heroic Oaths Sworn: | 16 |
| Tesseract Cubes Discovered: | 2 | Haunted Redstone Contraptions Built: | 1 |
Random Fact: Did you know? The first Dragon Egg found was hatched during a meteor shower!
But that’s not all – our server is also home to a secret underground society of talking chickens who have formed their own government. Will you join forces with them or challenge their rule? The choice is yours!
So why waste time getting a real driver’s license when you can have all the fun and excitement right here on our server? Join now and start your wild Minecraft adventure today!
| Players: | 107/600 | Uptime: | 97% |
| Rating: | 4.9 / 5 | ||
| Mystical Artifacts Crafted: | 10 | Elemental Forces Harnessed: | 8 |
| Ether Blades Crafted: | 12 | Dimensional Rifts Closed: | 3 |
| Celestial Blades Sharpened: | 13 | Leprechaun Gold Stolen: | 2 |
| Love Letters Sent: | 15 | Galactic Jellyfish Caught: | 3 |
| Dragonfire Shields Forged: | 8 | Voidwalker Blades Crafted: | 4 |
Random Fact: Did You Know? A player once found a magical teapot that pours endless hot chocolate—it’s now the most popular spot in town!
Do you want to build a giant potato statue of yourself in the middle of a lava lake? We got you covered. Want to ride a pig dressed as a cowboy while shooting arrows at creepers? Absolutely doable. The possibilities are endless in this wacky world of blocky adventures.
But beware, we have a strict policy of only allowing players who can juggle with TNT while riding a unicycle. So if you think you have what it takes to survive in this crazy realm, join us and show off your skills.
And remember, our motto is to bully seaniggers, discord trannies, bugmen, /v/ermins, dramaniggers, tourists, retards & degenerates, so be prepared to embrace the chaos and have a blast. See you in the game, but only if you’re ready for the wildest ride of your Minecraft life!
| Players: | 106/500 | Uptime: | 96% |
| Rating: | 4.2 / 5 | ||
| Wizards Turned into Frogs: | 1 | Enchanted Armories Found: | 10 |
| Paranormal Events Investigated: | 4 | Enchanted Teapots Collected: | 18 |
| Necronomicon Pages Collected: | 5 | Twisted Realms Survived: | 2 |
| Legendary Armor Sets Assembled: | 41 | Cursed Statues Activated: | 4 |
| Cursed Artifacts Uncovered: | 2 | Living Statues Befriended: | 2 |
Random Fact: Did You Hear? A player once brewed a potion that made their pet bunny fly—it’s now the most popular bunny in the skies.
Imagine this: you’re mining for diamonds when suddenly, a group of players approaches you and asks for your in-game number. You politely decline, stating that you’re only interested in mining and crafting. But wait, they insist that their friend, who happens to be a creeper in disguise, has a crush on you! They argue that since the creeper identifies as a player, it’s totally cool for you to date them.
Luckily, your trusty Minecraft buddy, let’s call them Steve, swoops in to save the day. Steve reminds you that you’re not obligated to date anyone you’re not interested in, whether they’re a zombie, skeleton, or even a dragon in human form. But then, another player named Lily pops up and accuses you of being transphobic for not giving the creeper a chance. The drama unfolds as you navigate through the complexities of love and friendship in the pixelated world of Minecraft.
So why join our server? Because where else can you experience such absurd and hilarious scenarios while building your own virtual world? Come join us and let the chaos begin!
| Players: | 104/400 | Uptime: | 95% |
| Rating: | 4.0 / 5 | ||
| Forbidden Grimoires Read: | 2 | Werewolf Howls Heard: | 5 |
| Magical Ponies Rescued: | 3 | Nether Portals Gone Wrong: | 4 |
| Dragons Adopted as Pets: | 3 | Pockets of Chaos Discovered: | 3 |
| Cozy Campfires Lit: | 17 | Invisible Walls Found: | 4 |
| Twisted Realms Survived: | 3 | Unseen Monsters Slain: | 4 |
Random Fact: Insider Secret: Players who solve unsolvable puzzles are said to unlock the ability to talk to fish.
